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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Aside from Thursday's sock update later, what will be the highlight of your day?
Alt: alright
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 8:17, 181 replies, latest was 10 years ago)
being mean to nobbers like you, online

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 8:19, Reply)
You might win todays round of the sock competition, mine are quite horrible.

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 8:20, Reply)
mine are Davidson tartan
I have this autistic thing where if I don't wear a Scottish themed item of clothing every day, I get anxiety attacks.
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 8:22, Reply)
You need to start entering the competition, you might be in with a shout with those badmen

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 8:24, Reply)
nah I couldn't take part in a sock competition
Foot fetish innit. I'd end up wanking myself into a Cranley lather.

That sort of event is frowned on in restricted advice firms.
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 8:27, Reply)
Ah just as well as your socks sound rubbish and I was trolling you.

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 8:28, Reply)
just as well my socks are plain black and I don't really have a thing for feet.
Except for Sian Williams' feet, I'm only human.

TROLLED AGAIN!!!!!
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 8:33, Reply)
I knew you were lying though, and trolled you into admitting it.
DOUBLE BLUFF TROLLED!!!
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 8:35, Reply)
I trolled you into suspecting I was lying, then set a troll trap which you fell into.
Feet first!
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 8:36, Reply)
The sooner the universe at large and b3ta qotw in particular
realises that this sort of exchange means you've both lost, the better things will be.
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:25, Reply)
^ upset

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:59, Reply)
I've just been phoned by the local rag to do an interview about the lack of gps and possible surgery .closures. Dunno how they got my details. If I do it, it'll be the secondary highlight of the day.
The main highlight will be giving the virtues a grape each. They played grape football yesterday, it amused us :)
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 8:23, Reply)
virtues
Cycling ave.
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 8:24, Reply)
Budgies=virtues in predictive text.

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 8:29, Reply)
What kind of ancient technology uses predictive text these days?

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 8:31, Reply)
Phone. It kicks in on certain websites, including B3ta.

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 8:34, Reply)
What kind of ancient phone still uses predictive text?

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 8:35, Reply)
Motorola Startac.

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 8:37, Reply)
what kind of tosser doesn't check what they've typed before posting it?
A bent tosser.
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 8:34, Reply)
Shut up dozer.

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 8:51, Reply)
What kind of fat-fingered prick assumes it's the phone's fault when he hits the wrong letter?

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 8:53, Reply)
Doctor Bent Troll

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 8:58, Reply)
Nakers

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:06, Reply)
our virtue is scared of grapes

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:52, Reply)
I dont believe anyone here has their virtue left intact

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:29, Reply)
Going to see two of Monty's favourite bands tonight
I just hope his brother doesn't give me drugsaids
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 8:47, Reply)
Who are playing?

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 8:50, Reply)
Two of Monty's favourite bands

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 8:54, Reply)
primal scream and arab strap?

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 8:50, Reply)
alice and head?

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 8:58, Reply)
aids and on the run

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:03, Reply)
elastic and brass?

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:05, Reply)
* does wanker hand gesture *

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:06, Reply)
Absolutely fuck all
Though I did have rather a good night's sleep
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:09, Reply)
I fell out of bed the other night
I wasn't even drunk for once!
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:10, Reply)
I keep doing the "jump" thing where you think you are about to fall out and wake yourself up

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:14, Reply)
That's a hypnic jerk
(and not your astral body leaving your mortal shell as the first hit on google suggested)
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:30, Reply)
YOUR a hypnic jerk

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:30, Reply)
myoclonic

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:36, Reply)
hypnagogic

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:41, Reply)
GREASED LIGHTNING!

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:41, Reply)
Hahaha!

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:58, Reply)
NDITB

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:42, Reply)
Anything other than plain black socks is "a bit gay mate"
I expect the highlight of my day will be chicken.
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:13, Reply)
*chicken fives*
Roast corn-fed chicken legs this evening
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:14, Reply)
How do you feed its legs?

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:20, Reply)
Its kneesy

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:22, Reply)
Thanks for that Mr Patel(la)

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:24, Reply)
I don't start work for ten minutes and I've already got on the wrong side of the payroll manager.

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:19, Reply)
That doesn't rhyme

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:21, Reply)
Perhaps if you'd gone to gay poetry college for gay poets
you'd recognise a deconstructed rhythmic verse when you saw one.
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:32, Reply)
sounds a bit Pynchonesque m8

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:34, Reply)
Theres a guy are work who calls everyone "mate" it sounds a bit passive agressive.
I prefer FRIEND!
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:37, Reply)
I prefer 'Good evening *wanker hand gesture* bankrupt payroll fraud patron wine stowford press restraining order anger management terrified wife'

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:39, Reply)
Yeh well I googled Gay poetry rules for gay poets on the googles and it said poems don't have to rhyme
it also awarded me an A*+ for my world changing Baggenfock poem!
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:34, Reply)
Poems don't have to rhyme.
However yours was trying and failing. There's a world of difference between those two poles, daddio.
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:37, Reply)
I can't have been trying to rhyme, the words clearly didn't rhyme you said so yourself
they were as different as jam and cream.
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:46, Reply)
I jammed my cream in YM last night

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:47, Reply)
Yeh well I marmaladed my cock up YM's arse last night!

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:50, Reply)
Oh, the old back-pedally back-pedal.
You were trying to rhyme, you didn't. You're a failure of a human being.
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:48, Reply)
No actually I think you will find that I was trolling the trolls

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:48, Reply)
METATROOL

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:52, Reply)
not in my top ten transformers

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:55, Reply)
Worst blues song ever

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:22, Reply)
Having dinner with my Dad at Buen Ayre this evening
lots of delicious meat.

And then dinner.
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:23, Reply)
What's the vegetarian option?

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:24, Reply)
A glass of water.

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:29, Reply)
Alright Lusty, do you do vegetarian food at your place?

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:31, Reply)
At the bar I'm in now?
Not really. It's not the most inspiring menu though.
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:32, Reply)
I'll just have a pint then

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:34, Reply)
When are you there?

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:37, Reply)
Oh I'm not, I'm just imagining I'm not here

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:38, Reply)
Oh right,

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:40, Reply)
I'm not at your bar either, FYI

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:54, Reply)
Neither am I.

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:56, Reply)
I think we're all far more well-rounded people for having this knowledge.
Well done, everyone.
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:04, Reply)
and a punch in the face
Hi Lusty!
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:43, Reply)
alright.

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:49, Reply)
Fuck you ranga!
www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/10082592/Mathematician-solves-the-great-scone-debate.html
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:32, Reply)
Finally science starts doing something useful.

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:34, Reply)
Maths will always prove Cornwall>Devon

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:35, Reply)
You're all Dumnonian hill-billy six-toes to me, m8.

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:38, Reply)
You say Dumnonian like its an insult.

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:39, Reply)
I do. I do, indeed.

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:40, Reply)
Same thing innit?

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:39, Reply)
Except for the scones, yeh.

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:40, Reply)
Do you need special socks to accomodate the extra toes?

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:41, Reply)
Contrary to popular belief I'm afraid I have just 5 toes on each foot,
Have never fucked my sister and know nothing about farming.
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:45, Reply)
Or spelling

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:50, Reply)
^overpowering lack of self-awareness^

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:51, Reply)
Who puts a layer of jam down first when building a sandcastle?
This is all clearly nonsense
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:37, Reply)
This will be why your sandcastles wash away

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:40, Reply)
No I think it's the sea

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:41, Reply)
Bob Marley made good sandcastles

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:45, Reply)
Thanks for voting for reply 2382000!

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:49, Reply)
trips

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:57, Reply)
FOBT4C

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:58, Reply)
totes hacking your 'cloud' for nudes now

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:00, Reply)
Please don't I have loads of nudes in my icloud

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:04, Reply)
check 'em

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:00, Reply)
university of sheffield?
SHEFFIELD?
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:54, Reply)
Oh, sorry, I didn't know you were one of the elitist pricks.
I mean I already knew you voted tory but I assumed that as you were with frog you couldn't be that bad.
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:58, Reply)
She's just desperate to convince people that she got her degree from somewhere posh.
If people realised that she went to one of the dodgy places that only exist to give Indians fake visas, her career would be fucked.
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:05, Reply)
I got a degree somewhere posh and its not helped me any

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:16, Reply)
something something healing something

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:20, Reply)
Yes my socks heal my feet, so fucking what? I learned about them in my posh uni

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:27, Reply)
which place?
i have 3 fake visas, from 3 different places.

in your face.
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:18, Reply)
You should be deported.

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:33, Reply)
Plain grey socks today, mate.
My life is an endless rush of excitement in choosing between plain black socks, plain grey socks of various shades, or black socks with a colored toe and heel.
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:33, Reply)
I have some black with a coloured toe or heal
but they said I was being racist so I have to call the coloured bit black as well. Its so confusing.
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:36, Reply)
They make your feet better?

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:45, Reply)
heel

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:57, Reply)
Sporters already pointed that out you unoriginal bastard

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:59, Reply)
shut up worzel

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:19, Reply)
Fuck off back to your shit uni ranga

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:27, Reply)
My socks are black with some kind of blue fleur de lis on them
I've now had some bagels so all is good
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:35, Reply)
Typical Jew

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:39, Reply)
*checks foreskin*

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:41, Reply)
You keep it in your wallet?

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:42, Reply)
Of course, I'm Jewish
I dont give anything away
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:44, Reply)
M.O.T.
member of the Tribe
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:57, Reply)
My member is uncut, thank you very much

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:58, Reply)
What happens to the foreskins the rabbis trim off? I'm afraid to google it.

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:59, Reply)
The only bacon they'll ever eat....

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:59, Reply)
Jew bacon :((

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:05, Reply)
Jeacon

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:09, Reply)
Deacon

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:09, Reply)
shoe or blue?

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:12, Reply)
Joey.

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:14, Reply)
Shoe then

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:15, Reply)
?

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:20, Reply)
He famously threw his shoe in the sea on a Blue Peter episode

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:27, Reply)
They sow them together
and make luggage out of them. If you rub a wallet it turns into an overnight bag.
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:01, Reply)
baw+

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:02, Reply)

isitthursday.org/
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:51, Reply)
I like this

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:53, Reply)
I like YOU. Coming out to play?

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:57, Reply)
Yay!
*stops scripting work and runs around outside*
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:59, Reply)
*tigs* you're it!

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:04, Reply)
tgtigsit^

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:08, Reply)
Way to point out that it's not Friday, chap.
Now I'm miserable.
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:54, Reply)

isitfriday.org/
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 9:56, Reply)
heaven knows

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:26, Reply)
My ring's twitching. It feels funny.
Please help.
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:05, Reply)
Stand in front of a miror, and say 'Jaysums' three times.

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:07, Reply)
his anus is hungry for cock

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:08, Reply)
I don'tknow if he gives or takes. Gaz him will you?

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:13, Reply)
he dunt take

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:14, Reply)
:O

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:21, Reply)
mrs baggenfock
jezebel.com/white-mom-accidentally-gets-black-baby-stresses-out-s-1641191493?utm_campaign=socialflow_jezebel_facebook&utm_source=jezebel_facebook&utm_medium=socialflow
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:19, Reply)
typical black hating lesbo.

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:22, Reply)
she sounds like such a horrific woman
i hope her cunt dries up
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:25, Reply)
They all do swipey, they all do
#HRT #stillawoman #bloobloo
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:28, Reply)
#lols

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:38, Reply)
I hope 10 hard pipe smoking brothers gang rape her.

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:28, Reply)
in the cunt and mouth.

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:29, Reply)
hahah

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:29, Reply)
*jails stumped poster for 18 weeks*

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:29, Reply)
you'll never take me alive.

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:38, Reply)
moat poster^

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:43, Reply)
No sock update yet then :(

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:34, Reply)
hold onto your hat snakeypoos

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:38, Reply)


(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:40, Reply)
it's gone all big again...

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:42, Reply)
Fucking hell.
You've got Mr. Men shoes!
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:42, Reply)


(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:43, Reply)
has got style^

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:45, Reply)
He's naked apart from hat and shoes

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 11:00, Reply)
*winks*

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 11:00, Reply)
POW! WINTER PATTERN IN GHASTLY COLOURS

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:45, Reply)
i feel like I should take my shoes off for tomorrows input
I'm on the look out for some "fairisle" socks
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:46, Reply)
My favourite but sadly departed pair had a pattern described as 'pub carpet' on the packaging. They were brown and orange.

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:48, Reply)
cross channel ferry chic

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:49, Reply)
Might go with a bold stripe tomorrow, need to formulate my game plan for victory.

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:50, Reply)
On Friday's all bets are off
BRING IT BITCH
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:51, Reply)
Also congratulations on a fine orange cuff today.

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:51, Reply)
toes and heel as well of course
I wonder where everyone has gone?
(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 10:53, Reply)
Jelly of our sock skills, run away crying

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 11:02, Reply)
Once you've gone black, you never go back

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 11:03, Reply)
Too right. I'm not too keen on this homo erotic sock talk.

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 11:09, Reply)
Fucking twitching too much to sit still, ain't i.

(, Thu 2 Oct 2014, 11:13, Reply)

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