Off TopicAre you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
(
rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
« Go Back | Popular
I Got Sent Here - You're A Good Man I'm A FoolNot just good "lager bombs", they have to be room-clearers. People stampeding the fire exits.
Say.... in the course of a day you polished off 8 pints of Newkie Brown Ale, coupla glasses of red, a coupla steak and onion pies, a takeaway curry, a 5 pound block of Hershey's, 6 coffees.... then you got on to the good stuff, if ya know what I mean and I think you know what I mean.... and it all got gummed up and stayed in there for 36 hours.
And you're at your Monday 10am physics lecture when all hell breaks loose....
(, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 13:52, 142 replies, latest was 9 years ago)
Woah, woah, what's all this Australian nonsense when everyone is enjoying a perfectly good McBeef thread?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 13:53,
Reply)
that would indeed have big ramifications (
GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 13:54,
Reply)
I reckon it already has, this has all the hallmarks of a drive-by(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 13:57,
Reply)
Our revenge must be relentless and unforgiving (
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 13:58,
Reply)
www.theguardian.com/business/2015/feb/05/coca-cola-makeithappy-gakwer-mein-coke-hitler
(, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 13:55, Reply)
Hello, I don't think we've meet. Tell me, what are your hopes and dreams? What gets your juices flowing?I'd invite you to put up a chair, but we're on the internet.
(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 13:55,
Reply)
You don't want to be in the middle of a shit, it means you've got it on both sides.(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:11,
Reply)
Oh, that was unintentional.I thought for a moment you were talking about my sig, which is based on Eminem; can't remember what song, but it's on his new album.
(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:25,
Reply)
SHIT OFF DICK NOSE(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:00,
Reply)
No, FarkwitI assume *ANY* subject can be funny if done correctly.
Hey, tough guy: give me your list of "British things that can never be funny". I'll file it for future reference.
(, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:09, Reply)
what's a farkwit?(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:11,
Reply)
That's true, but it wasn't so much a remake, more a reworking of the concept. Ricky Gervais in any event.
(
Muns, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:23,
Reply)
NiceI'll pay that. Never understood that show's popularity. And "Little Britian".
(, Sat 7 Feb 2015, 3:39, Reply)
Woah, we've bit of a live one here. Did you used to be Australian?
(
Muns, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:14,
Reply)
Still Waiting For Your List, Tough GuyLet me help....
1. Farts: out
2. __________
3. __________
4. __________
5.___________
(, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:18, Reply)
I Was Going To....But very recently, I spied an interesting multi-panel comic on the board that says the FAQs are completely useless.
Something about "where can I host my pictures on B3ta?"
Get with the program, sizzlechest.
(, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:25, Reply)
You can host them on popular image hosting websites such as imgur or myspace, then print them out, roll it up nice and tight and shove it up your farking ass(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:29,
Reply)
I'm enjoying the tough guy reference too much at the moment. Will you be suggesting that we meet up for a fight, despite the logistics behind this being completely ridiculous, in a misguided attempt to defend your manhood?
(
Muns, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:21,
Reply)
Quick mention that you do security then maybe he'll tell you he's a black belt and then it is like so fucking ON bro(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:23,
Reply)
Fark Me.... Have A Listen To You LotI love your little bitch signatures at the end of your posts espousing your little bitch beefs from gawd knows how many years ago.
What a pack of children.
"Drive by" indeed.
(, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:05, Reply)
I don't even have a sig. :((
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:06,
Reply)
Hooray someone really actually is upset on the internet \o/(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:07,
Reply)
Can we get a full Fairholme before I go home?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:09,
Reply)
Dunno, I'll google 'big ramifications spina bifida kids' and post the photos, see what happens. (
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:11,
Reply)
I think he might be "trolling" us for "lols"(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:11,
Reply)
I like things that are lol. Like you and tangles and dj smile. (
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:13,
Reply)
Why Do You Think I'm Upset?Why can't you imagine me larfing my ass off as I respond to your comments?
It's like I've tried to enter the secret cubby house with the wrong secret knock. Have a listen to you lot.
(, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:13, Reply)
You appear to find sigs offensive, that is why. (
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:14,
Reply)
I'd prefer not to imagine you at all(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:18,
Reply)
You do realise on this whole "I'm not upset" line of thinking, 'laughing your arse off' is just as phsycotic as being irate?Indifferent would be the best emotion to fraine.
(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:34,
Reply)
Good Farking GravySo we've reached the pinnacle of playground arguments: "I know you are.... but what am I?"
Seriously, champ?
(, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:37, Reply)
Are you crying? Oh emm gee he's actually crying! Gutted. (
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:39,
Reply)
I think you've misconstrued what I said, don't worry though, it's a common ailment for those on the autistic spectrum.But just to help you understand the social situation of the above conversation; I was not saying "I know you are, but what am I" - I was just helping you to to judge that if you're going to fraigne an emotion, your best bet would be indifference.
If you'd like, I can purchase some of these for you in order to help you in the future.
(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 15:01,
Reply)
So you have diagnosed me as "on the autistic spectrum"?
You absolute flogger. Loving your work.
(, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 15:16, Reply)
Thart would be the responsibility of a healthcare professionarl. Although it would explain a lot.
(
Muns, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 15:41,
Reply)
'ave a word, you're a wrongun you are. Just like your faggot father was, and just like your children will be.Now get out of my presence before I do something you'll regret.
(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:13,
Reply)
what's a block of her she's? (
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:06,
Reply)
That's BetterSome non descript hoo-har. Not playin' the man. Not suggesting BRITISH HUMOUR is the balls.
(, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:19, Reply)
do you want to have sex?my dick isn't massive but I'm excellent at rimming
(, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:22, Reply)
I think you'll find that us regulars here on premier british humour site b3ta know a bit more about humour than you do, someone who has only been a member for 11 days.(, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:22, Reply)
Yep, Secret Cubby House, Wrong Secret Cubby House KnockOnly been doing humour for 11 days.
You idiot.
(, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:32, Reply)
Words on the Internet can be hurtful friend. (
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:33,
Reply)
We take our posting seriously on here. You can't just come on here and insult our finely honed comedy stylings. I bet you haven't even read up who's who on the b3ta wiki.
Amateurish farcing Amateurish
(, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:35, Reply)
It's like you expect us to respect you even though you haven't reasearched the in jokes we've sweated on for a combined decades.(, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:37, Reply)
I bet he hasn't consulted the b3ta dictionary even once(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:39,
Reply)
ExactlyCan I get a witness!! [+upsidedown ? representing a rhetorical question ]
(, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:43, Reply)
No, but I can supply a 'fark off' if you need one.(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:44,
Reply)
I mean I bet you don't even know what the best beer to go with pizza is.COME BACK HERE WHEN YOU KNOW THE ANSWER AND MAYBE WE'LL TALK THEN K???
(, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:39, Reply)
ApologiesThe "11 days" thing was a p!sstake and I missed it. I feel much shame....
(, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:50, Reply)
I think you need to have a nice cup of tea to calm yourself down and re-read what I said. (
Muns, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:23,
Reply)
Why don't you re-read it *to* him tough guy?????(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:26,
Reply)
I just farkin watched WhiplashIts farkin great #farkingintofilm
(
Peej, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:38,
Reply)
I really enjoyed that. JK Simmons was pretty much being Vern Schillinger all over again though.(
Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:54,
Reply)
Yeah, it's good.It does feel a bit dated now though.
(
Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 15:19,
Reply)
I have to admit to being slightly jealous. Working all weekend so I can't touch a drop until Sunday evening.
(
Muns, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:47,
Reply)
No need m8, I'm not really having any carns, but it is farking payday so there.(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:50,
Reply)
I love a Friday. I've managed to find a plant room with a sofa in it. I am not doing any more today, and you farking know it.
(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:53,
Reply)
I've just got back from the pub.Can't really be arsed now.
(
Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:54,
Reply)
you and me are killing this country.(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:56,
Reply)
Oh this is farn.(
Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:54,
Reply)
I think she's gone already. (
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 6 Feb 2015, 14:55,
Reply)
I liked that he has developed his own swearing, like in the farq(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 6 Feb 2015, 15:00,
Reply)
A bit of new blood is no bard tharng. Ceptin when it's this cunt.
I hate Friday Ufternoons.
(, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 15:02, Reply)
LOOK EVERYONE DARKTOR BARST TRARLL IS HERE(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 15:05,
Reply)
YYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 6 Feb 2015, 15:10,
Reply)
where's MARRRRRK gone?I was just beginning to like him and he's farked off.
something something British Humor.
Oh and list of things not funny to a Brit...
Americans.
(
GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 6 Feb 2015, 15:14,
Reply)
« Go Back | Reply To This »