I'm as serious as cancer,
When I say rhythm is a dancer
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 14 May 2015, 7:52, 116 replies, latest was 9 years ago)

Bit of a heavy topic for a morning thread

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 14 May 2015, 8:02, Reply)

only because your parents died of cancer suicide and it makes you do a sad.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 14 May 2015, 8:43, Reply)

my dick gave asscancer to YD

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 14 May 2015, 8:54, Reply)

there's nothing funny about cancer
humour only works if it contains racism or disability
(lol man river definite greek god, Thu 14 May 2015, 8:02, Reply)

stevie wonder is a comedy #ledge

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 14 May 2015, 8:04, Reply)

as ever, you are wrong. you forgot sexism.

( d.r._and_quinch when will you be famous?, Thu 14 May 2015, 8:06, Reply)

women are NEVER funny
not even as a joke
(lol man river definite greek god, Thu 14 May 2015, 8:30, Reply)

or deletion

(Baggenfrock get fucked, Thu 14 May 2015, 8:27, Reply)

or envee getting upset

(lol man river definite greek god, Thu 14 May 2015, 8:33, Reply)

I'm looking at "gift horse" on the fourth plinth at traf square as we drive past it
Better than a giant blue cock is the verdict
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 14 May 2015, 8:09, Reply)

was it ever a giant blue cock?

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 14 May 2015, 8:10, Reply)

y
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 14 May 2015, 8:13, Reply)

bit french.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 14 May 2015, 8:16, Reply)

Mais oui

( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 14 May 2015, 8:21, Reply)

You should probably concentrate on driving,
rather than gazing out the side windows and browsing the internet.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 14 May 2015, 9:09, Reply)

well, i thought i might let the driver do that bit
as it's HIS JOB
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 14 May 2015, 9:53, Reply)

You have your own driver?
Are you the Queen, or summat?
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 14 May 2015, 10:15, Reply)

gonna strike for the right to get into your cold heart

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 14 May 2015, 8:14, Reply)

sympathy reply

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 14 May 2015, 8:56, Reply)

^already farking bored

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 14 May 2015, 8:56, Reply)

Doesn't even rhyme

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 14 May 2015, 8:38, Reply)

not my words,
The words of John "Virgo" garret
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 14 May 2015, 8:42, Reply)

it does if you don't have garbled German vowels

(lol man river definite greek god, Thu 14 May 2015, 8:46, Reply)

maybe I like garbling German vowels, if you know what I mean.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 14 May 2015, 8:49, Reply)

my favourite garbled German vowels are the ones in Scheiße and Couchtisch

(lol man river definite greek god, Thu 14 May 2015, 8:51, Reply)

Zis vould never haf happened under ze Nazis

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 14 May 2015, 8:52, Reply)

Well this is good.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 14 May 2015, 9:09, Reply)

don't lie

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 14 May 2015, 9:10, Reply)

how do you something your favourite something of something?
Haha that's the worst sort and you're doing it wrong, loser.
(lol man river definite greek god, Thu 14 May 2015, 9:13, Reply)

Morning everyone
I'm at dangerously low peanut butter levels....
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 14 May 2015, 9:11, Reply)

they sell it in shops
hope this helps
(lol man river definite greek god, Thu 14 May 2015, 9:12, Reply)

It really does!
THANKS!
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 14 May 2015, 9:15, Reply)

no probs babe xx

(lol man river definite greek god, Thu 14 May 2015, 9:20, Reply)

It's this kind of support that keeps me coming back

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 14 May 2015, 9:24, Reply)

I'll stop doing it then.

(lol man river definite greek god, Thu 14 May 2015, 9:50, Reply)

Hi kids! Miss me?
I've been doing CIEH Level 3 Award in Health and Safety in the Workplace! Thats right! Level 3! Now I know you are already impressed but don't worry I'm not going to let my success change me, I'm just the same Peej I was before and I don't expect you to treat me any differently.
( Peej, Thu 14 May 2015, 9:21, Reply)

YESSSSS!!!!

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 14 May 2015, 9:23, Reply)

1) Don't fuck about on the mezzanine

( Muns, Thu 14 May 2015, 9:23, Reply)

+ when Monty is angry about breaking one of his high heels

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 14 May 2015, 9:25, Reply)

#womensproblems #MENopauase #MENstruating

( Muns, Thu 14 May 2015, 9:26, Reply)

cor! those safety goggles really bring out the pink of your eyes

(lol man river definite greek god, Thu 14 May 2015, 9:30, Reply)

So slide over here
And give me a moment
Your moves are so raw
I've got to let you know
HR have received a number of complaints
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 14 May 2015, 9:28, Reply)

Hey - we wanna look each other in the eye.
We wanna high-five.
We wanna whisper, we wanna whisper sweets things in our ears.
I wanna tremble your earbones.
Open your trembling earbones.
Listen.
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 14 May 2015, 9:36, Reply)

Fuck me. I just read the Emvee Saga on QOTW
I'm not sure if I should let him continue making himself look shit or use my Supersecretultramodpowers to ban him for "AIDS-riddled spastic child" Maybe I should start a poll
( Peej, Thu 14 May 2015, 9:38, Reply)

It's important to remember that, although everyone is very upset,
no one is upset.
Also racism/sexism/disablism/all other -isms are unacceptable when other people are using them.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 14 May 2015, 9:41, Reply)

C'MON GUYS LET'S MAKE THESE LAST 48 HOURS COUNT
b3ta.com/links/1197151
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 14 May 2015, 9:40, Reply)

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 14 May 2015, 9:40, Reply)

Now is probably a good time to talk to rob about buying b3ta

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 14 May 2015, 9:45, Reply)

B3ta wise I want for nothing
I would pay Rob about ten times the minimum requirement, plus transfers to two trusts for UsVsThem and a saving scheme for /Talk.
( Peej, Thu 14 May 2015, 9:50, Reply)

I earned £400 (before tax) for a one hour meeting today. Trufax.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 14 May 2015, 9:52, Reply)

I'm going to use this time to get upset online

( $$ ✅, Thu 14 May 2015, 10:08, Reply)

( Slippery Mick ‏, Thu 14 May 2015, 10:17, Reply)

beautiful

( $$ ✅, Thu 14 May 2015, 10:22, Reply)

Navy seals

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 14 May 2015, 10:22, Reply)

I remember reading something about both Russia and the US trying to train dolphins to find/mine ships and submarines.
But these things usually failed because they were unable to get the dolphins to take the tasks remotely seriously.
( Slippery Mick ‏, Thu 14 May 2015, 10:26, Reply)

I'm confident that the adverts at the top of the page, that absolutely no one ever sees,
are providing sufficient revenue to keep this site afloat.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 14 May 2015, 10:18, Reply)

La hu-aracha, la hu-aracha
Ya no puede caminar.
Porque no tiene, porque le falta,
una correa de talón.
Una hu-aracha pinta,
Le dijo a uno colorado,
"Vamonos para mi tierra,
A pasar la temporada"
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 14 May 2015, 9:53, Reply)

i don't want to see a ghost
it's the sight that i fear most
i'd rather have a piece of toast
watch the evening news
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 14 May 2015, 10:15, Reply)

When I was a kid I heard a song, the first line was...
Of all the Men at News at Ten I got the biggest spots
They say I have the perfect face for playing join the dots.

However the internet has failed me in identifying it.
( Peej, Thu 14 May 2015, 10:17, Reply)

i heard this "song" on the radio once
scarred me for life. google tells me it's an actual thing. I can't believe it.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=6EWWI4ikV6g
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 14 May 2015, 10:20, Reply)

You hoovered my head last night

( Peej, Thu 14 May 2015, 10:24, Reply)

you wish

( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 14 May 2015, 10:24, Reply)

I can help, it's by The Electric Head Funk.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 14 May 2015, 10:22, Reply)