How to annoy your flatmate
If you really want to piss your flatmate off, eat their food, drink their drink, use their toothpaste, steal their shower gel and hair gel, don't flush the toilet after you piss, leave piles of freshly washed still-wet clothes on the sofa, forget to turn the iron off on a regular basis, never put the ironing board away after you use it, fail to close the fridge properly after you open it, borrow their CDs without asking and only give them back when they're noticed missing, go out without your keys and ring the doorbell at 2am to get them to let you in, only wash the dishes every third or fourth time it's your turn (and then only when there are more dirty dishes in your room than in the kitchen), stink the house up with so much Lynx it leaves a haze in the air, and, judging by the curly hairs I've just found, use my beard trimmer to shave your fucking pubic hair.

Sorry, did I say my beard trimmer? I meant "your flatmate's beard trimmer". Obviously.
(Paolo Nutini's Bikini Better than Frederick Fleet's optometrist, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 11:54, 6 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Would you like me to
shit in their cornflakes?
( Mrs Entity is in hiding., Mon 8 Jun 2009, 19:53, Reply)

I recommend this for ideas
www.b3ta.com/questions/revenge/
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 23:27, Reply)

Piss in the milk

(oneinthepink is at your cervix m'lady, Tue 9 Jun 2009, 13:54, Reply)

First ever post!
I've just ended a tenancy with someone like this. A fucking horrible position to be in - especially where money is involved. You can usually find though, that someone who has no respect for your stuff has no respect for their own stuff either. They're bound to have *something* good. Syphon it off, the cunt won't notice.
(django0909, Tue 9 Jun 2009, 23:01, Reply)

Eeesh...
tell me about it, I live with 3 other people and am forever being asked to help tidy up when there's none of my goddamn stuff in the room, it's all theirs! Then they moan that I never help tidy up! It's not my mess! i go to work from 9am till 6pm and spend most of my spare time out of the house either going out or going to my parents, they're all unemployed and spend most of their time in the house. If anyone is going to tidy up their mess it's them! They have all the time in the world to do it, the lazy bums!
(wehttamman via B3ta for microwave, Wed 17 Jun 2009, 16:04, Reply)

his name isn't Owen is it?
This rings far too many bells...
( wheresthefish Partly filled with wrong, Thu 18 Jun 2009, 15:07, Reply)