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This is a question Where Did It All Go Wrong?

Woocfot asks: Tell us all about that turning point in your life when it started going downhill. Yeah, that drunken conversation with my dad when he suggested I become a civil servant. Dammit, I could have been an astronaut

(I helped save b3ta! Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 28 Feb 2013, 11:32)
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I gave up booze at the end of last year in an effort to lose weight
Here's my problem; it's working. Now what the fuck am I supposed to do?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 28 Feb 2013, 11:49, 20 replies)
White wine spritzers?

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 28 Feb 2013, 11:50, closed)
Man the fuck up?

(I helped save b3ta! CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Thu 28 Feb 2013, 12:24, closed)
That's your answer to everything
I hope Chuck Norris never asks you a question
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 28 Feb 2013, 12:27, closed)
Chuck Norris doesn't ask questions.
He only gives answers.

Or something.
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Thu 28 Feb 2013, 13:24, closed)
That's because it is the only answer.
eat less, excercise more, booze more. Says the man who's accidentally put on a stone in the last 2 years.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Thu 28 Feb 2013, 18:00, closed)
Write a book.

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 28 Feb 2013, 13:20, closed)
If you're confusing me, even for a second, with apeloverage
I will END YOU
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 28 Feb 2013, 13:31, closed)
I find it difficult to be intimidated
by the terminally scrawny.
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 28 Feb 2013, 14:46, closed)
Pahahahaha
There speaks a man who hasn't seen my profile page
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 28 Feb 2013, 15:02, closed)

Nice dress.
(I helped save b3ta! Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Thu 28 Feb 2013, 22:21, closed)
Go out and get pissed to celebrate

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Thu 28 Feb 2013, 13:28, closed)
Therein lies my conundrum, Reverend!
If I take up booze again I might get fat! And if I don't, I might be miserable!
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 28 Feb 2013, 13:31, closed)
What you need to do young Darth is to tread the middle ground
Less carbs, moderate exercise, no beer, more G&T. Piece of piss.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Thu 28 Feb 2013, 14:37, closed)
Do you freeze it and break chunks of,
or reduce your water intake until it comes out like jelly?
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 28 Feb 2013, 14:47, closed)
Not usually, no.
Your wife insists that I hose her down with it.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Thu 28 Feb 2013, 15:20, closed)
Kill yourself.

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 28 Feb 2013, 14:37, closed)
Find God.

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 28 Feb 2013, 14:44, closed)
Texas is as good a place as any to start lookin'

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 28 Feb 2013, 15:02, closed)
Order a pint and a bacon butty

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 28 Feb 2013, 16:08, closed)
Use the money you've saved
on extensive facial remodelling?
(I helped save b3ta! number5 has been fighting tramps and losing., Thu 28 Feb 2013, 17:49, closed)

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