Wanking Disasters Part IIDespite the warnings contained in our previous question on The Act of Onan, you all still appear to be masturbating like monkeys in a zoo. Tell us your stories of jerking the gherkin and double-clicking the mouse.
Suggested by Mrs Entity and DaveExclamationMark, voted for by YOU
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Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 17 Feb 2011, 12:22)
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bank robbersyou know how you felt up jane hawkins when you were a young teen and ever since you've been able to pull her into your depraved fantasies while rubbing one out and then you see her in the real after 20 years and she is a bus. well fuck that. if you ask me people like jane hawkins the ex fantasy fwap queen of decades and now big lump of mashed potato shoved into a tiny onion bag should be arrested. wankbank robbers! trust me, you can not go back to that sexy ideal you had stored and lets face it someone should pay. thats a measurable loss of pleasure right there. thats a decrease in the quality of my life. thats a removal of my rights as a human being. worse than spiders. and something should be done. rob my wank bank, expect justice to be served.
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enoughblueskyforsailorstrousers, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 9:35,
7 replies)
Who?I tried searching for Jane Hawkins. Did you mean one of these?
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The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Tue 22 Feb 2011, 9:56,
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OH JESUS GOD *fapfapfap* YOU HAD TO POST THEM DIDN'T YOU*fapfapfapfapfap* AAARGH MY DEPRAVED FANTASIES *fapfapfapblort.
(, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 9:58, closed)
Out of curiositywho is the Jane Hawkins you referred to? Seriously, I have no idea.
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The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Tue 22 Feb 2011, 10:28,
closed)
random made up name like joe bloggs
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enoughblueskyforsailorstrousers, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 10:37,
closed)
D'oh!Thanks, mis-read the original post. Not enough sleep.
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The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Tue 22 Feb 2011, 10:42,
closed)
Oh yes you canThe first girl I fapped to, I also lost my virginity to. We were 13. I saw her again when we were 21, and again at 29. Still fit, and we both got better with experience.
However, I will admit that there's something disturbing about seeing the girl you slept with when you were 13 naked...and shaven. I like shaven, but that's the exception.
(, Tue 22 Feb 2011, 17:22, closed)
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