I'd like people to stop being stupid pricks, Chompy.
I'd like HR to stop making me jump through hoops just to get maternity leave cover for one of my staff.
I'd like a lovely, happy world... oh, fuck that, I'd like a ton of excellent gin and a place by the sea.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 22 Aug 2012, 16:29, 3 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

which sea?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 22 Aug 2012, 16:29, Reply)

On that isn't cold
and has not many sharky cunts.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 22 Aug 2012, 16:30, Reply)

Technically I already live by the sea
but it's not a very warm sea.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 22 Aug 2012, 16:31, Reply)

I hear cyprus is nice.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 22 Aug 2012, 16:33, Reply)

Meh, not really my bag.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 22 Aug 2012, 16:34, Reply)

South of France or the Amalfi coast or

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 22 Aug 2012, 16:35, Reply)

I hear california is full of pricks.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 22 Aug 2012, 16:36, Reply)

YOURN MUST BE CALIFORNIA THEN!

( Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 22 Aug 2012, 16:36, Reply)

I reckon you're right.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 22 Aug 2012, 16:43, Reply)

Do you have to get her to piss in a pot so they're sure she's pregnant.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 22 Aug 2012, 16:36, Reply)

no, she is on a three year contract on one of my research projects.
I can't put a hold on the project. therefore I need a replacement for the period she is on ML. Even if I did put a hold on the project, the Uni is obliged to pay 3 years salary (the money from the grant) plus 6 months ML (from their own pocket) whichever way it works. So despite the fact not putting a hold actually saves them money on an inflationary basis, I still have to write a massive justification regarding why I want to do it, and then be grilled by a committee as to why it's "best for the university"

I don't think "it doesn't make a cock of difference, why are you wasting my fucking time" is an acceptable response, sadly.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 22 Aug 2012, 16:41, Reply)

what a selfish bitch
You should throw acid in he face, or put stem cells in her coffee
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 22 Aug 2012, 16:44, Reply)

If he puts stem cells in her coffee he'll just grow a new version of her
Then he'll have two preggo wimmin
( Theoban What of it, Wed 22 Aug 2012, 16:48, Reply)

But then they'll do twice as much work before maternity leave, saving the university money.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 22 Aug 2012, 16:51, Reply)

I suppose one can look after both kids too, meaning no maternity

( Theoban What of it, Wed 22 Aug 2012, 16:52, Reply)

Exactly, or they could alternate between work and home. most problems are solved by cloning.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 22 Aug 2012, 16:55, Reply)

Unless your problem is 'I can't stop cloning'

( Theoban What of it, Wed 22 Aug 2012, 16:57, Reply)

and overpopulation

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 22 Aug 2012, 16:59, Reply)

Well maybe a clone can help with that
Clone Hitler
( Theoban What of it, Wed 22 Aug 2012, 17:00, Reply)

i said overpopulation
not overpopjewlation
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 22 Aug 2012, 17:02, Reply)

I've saved the university, huzzah!

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 22 Aug 2012, 16:56, Reply)

It'll find a way to destroy itself again, don't worry

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 22 Aug 2012, 17:02, Reply)

gaz me if you need me

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 22 Aug 2012, 17:03, Reply)

I've got not a single problem with her
she's ace. It's HR being cunts that I'm objecting to.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 22 Aug 2012, 17:01, Reply)

just burn the place down.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 22 Aug 2012, 16:46, Reply)

kick her in the tummy, all your problems will be solved

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 22 Aug 2012, 16:49, Reply)