That thread is crap.
Alright you bunch of bastards?

What's the best newspaper? What magazines do you read?

Alt: best roast meat? What do you accompany it with? I am looking forward to lots of delicious autumn food, particularly game.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:08, 117 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

alright BATTERED?
(waves)
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:10, Reply)

Quints!
Why U ignore me?
(Bazongaloid, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:14, Reply)

EXPERIMENTING

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:15, Reply)

with what?
And can I help?
(Bazongaloid, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:18, Reply)

thanks but its ok
i'll handle this one all by myself
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:20, Reply)

quinton?
you ignore me? that makes me sad.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:37, Reply)

soz double ewe pee
i'm ignoring everyone, so don't take it personal
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:39, Reply)

everyone?

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:42, Reply)

the whole damn site, WP
everyone
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:45, Reply)

Did you have to ignore each person individually, or is there a way to ignore the lot in one click?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:46, Reply)

everyone individually
it's a lot easier than i thought it would be, and i'm picking up everyone i've missed by replying to posts or starting new threads and ignoring anyone who replies
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:48, Reply)

I like that you're a complete fucking prick yet still keep trying.
wanker.
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:10, Reply)

Alright MMPS? You fucking shitcunt.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:15, Reply)

yeah innit, you wanking prickcunt

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:15, Reply)

I think the Guardian, even if it is a bit waahhhh lefty
it's the most readable without being patronising.
I don't read magazines.
I'm going to go with chicken, a boring choice but get a nice one and do it well and it's lovely. Plus you can make soup with it afterwards.
(PsychoChomp, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:14, Reply)

I also pick up the daily mail if I see it in a cafe, I like to tut loudly while I read it.

(PsychoChomp, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:21, Reply)

I am a member of the anti Daily Mail coalition.
I also prefer the Guardian over other papers
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:22, Reply)

The FT is good for world news.

(PsychoChomp, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:25, Reply)

As is the Economist

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:27, Reply)

I read there website but you're limited to 10ish articles a month I think.
which is slightly annoying.
(PsychoChomp, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:46, Reply)

Alright Quinten, I would like say I am heartbroken that you've 2.0'd me.
But I'm not.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:14, Reply)

nothing personal mister battered
xxxx
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:14, Reply)

oooh me too
the cheeky little fuckwit
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:15, Reply)

lol

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:15, Reply)

It's annoying to have to keep logging our and back in again on an IPad. Can't have more than one browser open at the same time.
I don't understand Q's experiement tbh.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:17, Reply)

probably best to carry on and just pretend i'm not here
like a ghost or something :/

oooOOOOooooOOOoooh!
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:20, Reply)

i think he wants to know what people say about him behind his back
the greasy neckless kebab machine
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:22, Reply)

I want to touch his winky with the end of my winky so we can do a cum up eath other's cockhole.

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:23, Reply)

I SO want to let you in on my TOP SECRET plan

(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:25, Reply)

there's a term for that
grinding, is it?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:26, Reply)

oh dear god swipey
STOP LOOKING AT PORN AND DO SOME WORK.
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:30, Reply)

gay porn helps my drafting
"your particulars are embarrassing in their want of specificity and twinks"
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:33, Reply)

RE: Statler vs Waldorf
Dear sirs,

This case requires immediate attention. We require to take a more bearish approach and really grab it by the balls....
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:38, Reply)

some barristers do that
they have bets with each other to see if they can get certain words into their statements.

solicitors are much more boring :(
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:40, Reply)

we play jargon bingo during meetings cause we're just that waki!!!!

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:41, Reply)

we do precisely nothing wakki
we do have good biscuits in meetings though. clubs and shit.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:54, Reply)

oh what? no wonder you fuckers charge so much.

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:57, Reply)

Is Quints posting? He must have blocked me too.
This is quite possibly the worst day of my life. I can't believe he'd do that to me, on today of all days.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:40, Reply)

He's conducting a secret experiment.
I may have said too much.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:41, Reply)

He must be putting our bonding at risk in the name of socio-sience.
Sociolololololologie must be more important =(
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:43, Reply)

I read Empire and Classic Rock

(Bazongaloid, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:15, Reply)

I might get a subscription to a gardening magazine. Hello middle age.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:21, Reply)

Odd name for a gardening magazine

(Captain Give-A-Fuck #internetpals4eva, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:24, Reply)

yet frighteningly accurate

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:32, Reply)

no, i've got a splitting headache from this stupid diet
self-inflicted wah wah wah.

i like the guardian; i think it's the best written and has the most unusual viewpoints, even though you know that sometimes they are scrabbling around for something to hate.

alt: nut roast, clearly
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:16, Reply)

It's not the diet
it's brain cancer
(Bazongaloid, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:18, Reply)

so i have AIDZ and brain cancer?
that's one unlucky diagnosis
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:20, Reply)

If the diet is giving you a headache then it cannot be good for you.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:19, Reply)

it is most definitely not good for me
but it's v short-term, so will be fine. my all or nothing mentality is such that i need a quick kick-start boost, to incentivise me to carry on.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:21, Reply)

Alright
Razzle

Alt: Leg of Lamb
(Captain Give-A-Fuck #internetpals4eva, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:16, Reply)

Do they still print Razzle?

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:18, Reply)

Yeah, the scud mag industry is still going strong surprisingly
There were a good three rows of them at the corner shop I was in t'other day.
(Captain Give-A-Fuck #internetpals4eva, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:19, Reply)

Thought the web woud have put paid to printed grot

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:20, Reply)

you always seem to see them in petrol stations
which is a bit odd, because surely the one time you can't read them is whilst driving?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:23, Reply)

What do you think those truck drivers are doing in laybys?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:28, Reply)

Sutcliffe excluded, obv.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:30, Reply)

each other
was my assumption

that and pissing into empty coca-cola bottles
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:32, Reply)

You haven't lived till you've had a sly one off the wrist at Toddington services
Makes up for paying almost double the usual cost for a Bacon Double Cheeseburger
(Captain Give-A-Fuck #internetpals4eva, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:28, Reply)

Alright?
Newpapers are all a bit shit. I read the Metro and Standard on the tube because they are free.

The only magazine I read is Record Collector. I don't know why I do, as it just upsets me. Oh yeah, I remember, one of my staff gives it to me for nothing, that's why. I used to get Classic Rock but my sub expired and I didn't renew it. It's pretty shit anyway apart from Lee Dorrian's column.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:21, Reply)

Not bad ta. Pissed off with the weather, I want to finish landscaping the back garden, but if I do it whilst the soil is wet it will end up looking like the battle of the Somme took place.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:24, Reply)

Newspapers? I dabble in the broadsheets but don't buy any paper regularly.
The only magazine I buy regularly is Private Eye, occasonaly I'll get the Acoustic Guitar magazine.
Alt: Roast pork. Has to be accompanied by stuffing, roast potatoes, roast parsnips, at least three types of veg and good gravy.

Mind you, I'm looking forward to the autumn foods. An ex colleague has just been invited to assist in a deer cull so I'm in for some nice venison soon, already got a few rabbits in the freezer.
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:23, Reply)

G S
(Captain Give-A-Fuck #internetpals4eva, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:24, Reply)

Edited
Although 'Acoustic Sitar' magazine could be a new venture.
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:27, Reply)

I don't have sufficient time to read a daily newspaper.
I used to read the Guardian when I did. The writing is pretty good, although despite being of a similar political leaning, I do find its bias a little annoying sometimes.
In magazines, I read Mojo, which is a bit old-man and dull, but is the closest to my demographic I can find - Wire is too clever and esoteric; Q is a shite, FHM-style music mag; the weekly music mags are too young and too shit.
Other than that I read Razzle (for the articles), or online I occasionally read The Quietus.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:24, Reply)

I'm alright Battered, how are you?
I don't know which newspaper is best, i always get the Times, because I like the crossword, but it's a bit bollocks.

Best roast meat is Lamb with a nice delicious mint sauce, taters, kale, beetroot, carrots and a fuck ton of good meaty gravy.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:26, Reply)

See above. Ever had an onion white sauce with roast lamb? Awesome

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:29, Reply)

yeah,
proper lovely that.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:37, Reply)

Viz and Private Eye
All the papers are shit, particularly the ones that think they aren't.

Best roast meat: a young anything.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:28, Reply)

I haven't read a viz in yonks...

but was clearing my loft out the other day and found an old annual. It didn't seem as funny as it did all those years ago.

Is it still any good?
(Mr Twisty Cheeky The worst kept secret in B3ta..., Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:37, Reply)

Curate's egg, as ever.
As my brother in law said, "You can't go wrong with a magazine that features a cartoon entitled 'The Vibrating Bum-Faced Goats'."

It seems to have taken a slightly darker bent over the past year or so, with the Drunken Bakers cartoonist, but the editorial is generally quite good.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:48, Reply)

'The Vibrating Bum-Faced Goats'...

Hahahaa!

I will take action to buy a copy this very afternoon.
(Mr Twisty Cheeky The worst kept secret in B3ta..., Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:50, Reply)

Good luck - it's now about £3-50 I think.
Or as they advertised once "Now even MORE expensive!"
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 11:01, Reply)

I would like the outsisde 1cm of an entire chicken, so I get all the skin and a tiny bit of the meat.
I reckon if I had a plate like that would be well good.

I don't really read papers or magazines anymore, I used to read a lot of magazines but I'm better off buying them online. I do read this one though: www.wonderpediamagazine.co.uk : it's so crap its good.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:28, Reply)

Wanting the healthy option as usual eh Gonz?

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:30, Reply)

Oh man, imagine if he had a severe bowel condition.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:36, Reply)

Going for the healthy option when being asked for the best roast meal, is a bit like going to a brothal and settling for wanking yourself off in the toilets.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:39, Reply)

Worst £100 I ever spent

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:40, Reply)

Magazines - I read When Saturday Comes
It's about FOOTBALL.

Angry claims that football is "shit" and "bent" in 3... 2...

(I also got a subscription to Good Food as a present).
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:30, Reply)

I tend to buy stuff like Good Food around Christmastime
when we're looking for new ideas for xmas dinner. Nothing much ever changes though as it's always 'well it wouldn't be christmas dinner without x and y'. Red cabbage done with port was the last thing we added I think. Only time I ever eat red cabbage it seems. Sorry, bit of a tangent there.
(Captain Give-A-Fuck #internetpals4eva, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:35, Reply)

Battered you fucking wanker.
What's happened to Harters, the doss prick? Hopefully fallen victim to an anal form of Anthrax.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:32, Reply)

On holidaying think

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:34, Reply)

Ayyy, mag-faaannns:
pdf-giant.com/

EDIT: APPARENTLY NSFW
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:34, Reply)

That is the best link I have seen here for some time. Well done. You fucking wanker

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:35, Reply)

Indeed, for quite some time now I have been trying to find some way of getting hold of back issues of the Slovakian edition of Playboy
pdf-giant.com/men/6946-playboy-slovakia-november-2011.html
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:39, Reply)

My antivirus blocked it for 'potentially damaging content'

(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:43, Reply)

I made the mistake of clicking the link above at work....

Somewhere in my office there will be little alarms going off and it's a matter of time before the internet poe-leece come and arrest me...again

:(
(Mr Twisty Cheeky The worst kept secret in B3ta..., Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:46, Reply)

How do I download that Barely Legal one? It's pushing me through to pay-to-download sites.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:45, Reply)

Cheers Boyce
"Site Blocked for Adult Content"
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:48, Reply)

Sorry mate
I only looked at the home page, looked like mainly US interiors magazines.

I'll visit you in prison.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:55, Reply)

And yet I have no trouble viewing and even posting on this weeks QOTW
Madness!
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:56, Reply)

Bad Manners!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 11:00, Reply)

The Specials!

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 11:01, Reply)

Its a good job you dont work in IT

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 11:03, Reply)

There's a difference between database development
and being the glorified electrician who maintains the internet connection and its associated logs.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 11:24, Reply)

Newspapers? I don't really have time...

However, my local pub usually has a sprinkling of the standard tabloids dotted around so when I'm there I scan through them for as long as I can stand...which isn't very long TBH

Inversely, your 'Alt' question has required me to put more thought and effort into a response than my meagre brain has had to endure for quite a while. I just can't make my mind up! you really have hit upon a most perplexing conundrum!
(Mr Twisty Cheeky The worst kept secret in B3ta..., Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:34, Reply)

alright pooflake?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:38, Reply)

Hello!

(Mr Twisty Cheeky The worst kept secret in B3ta..., Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:39, Reply)

Not bad thanks, you midget fuck.
I don't tend to read papers much anymore, and if I read magazines now, it's usually music ones.

Alt: Beef, with yorkshires, roasties, carrots coated in honey and mustard, parsnips, etc.

Morning all, had an excellent holiday, thanks for asking. I even found Dozer's holiday home, will upload the pic when I can.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:49, Reply)

Hello gayboy.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:56, Reply)

Alright?
I don't read newspapers any more. I get my news from the BBC these days. And here, obviously.

I read a few women's glossies, but I get them on my iPad to save cluttering up the house with paper. Of course, women's magazines quite often tend to give away free shit on the cover, and you miss out on that, but First World Problems, eh?

Alt: Chicken is probably the nicest roast meat, but when there's pork I act like a proper lolfatty and gannet a load of crackling.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:55, Reply)

Boring answer is boring.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:56, Reply)

Please Miss! Monty is posting inappropriate links and getting people into loads of trouble at work.
And now I keep looking at pictures of boobies.
Can you give him a good modding?
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:58, Reply)

Listen, you knob-jockey.
Banning you is already item 3 on the secret mod meeting agenda, don't fucking push it.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 11:01, Reply)

Bully!
I'm telling b3th on you.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 11:03, Reply)

ITEM 3

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 11:03, Reply)

Why would I want to do that?

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 30 Aug 2012, 11:02, Reply)

'Cos 'e loves it, the slag.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 11:03, Reply)

Only one of the links was NSFW
and it was at least a link. But I'll give him a metaphorical slap on the wrist for not writing "NSFTANGLE'SW" on it.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 30 Aug 2012, 11:07, Reply)

Oh it's fine at my work
I look at naughty stuff all the time and no one ever says anything.
I'm just concerned for other people who are too afraid of Monty's terrible bullying to speak out.
It's the kids I feel sorry for.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 11:09, Reply)

I
...T
...E
...M
. ..3
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 11:09, Reply)

You mean Freefair?

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 30 Aug 2012, 11:10, Reply)

Nah, he's alright - he loves a bit of internet porn .
He's at that awkward age, y'know?
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 11:12, Reply)

This is exactly what we've been talking about isn't it?
That WOMAD prick has to go.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 11:06, Reply)

I don't read newspapers
because I often find that rather than report simple facts they then add their own opinions on the facts and tell idiots what they should or shouldn't believe. I generally read the bbc news site because though they may only report they news they wat to report they are very unlikely to follow up a story with some shit campaign to ban dogs/cats/drugs/sick filth.

I don't read magazines because they are overpriced and you're paying for the ads that take up over half the magazine.

Alt. Lamb though I am not a fan of roast meat and prefer it grilled or fried.
( Peej, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:56, Reply)

BBC News and various footy websites provide me with my intake of news
Alt:
Beef - cooked rare with gravy, roasties and Yorkshire puddings only. HEAVEN
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 11:02, Reply)

You cannibal!
How can you eat your sisters?
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 11:04, Reply)

Tasty tasty

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 11:05, Reply)