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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Thats a shit thread....
Morning OT, I hope you all had a good evening kiddy fiddling...

Ok so on the drive into work this morning listening to radio 2 they started going on about "The young brass of the year" I thought that was a badly thought out award. Edit: Any other badly worded radio or TV announcements heard recently

Alt: Guilty povvo food secret, last night the missus was out so rather than cook anything decent I did chicken and chips, eat it without cutlery and felt great. What's your povvo food secret
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 8:11, 124 replies, latest was 10 years ago)
I'm a big fan of Heinz baked beans.
Guilty food secret, right there.

Loads of cheese grated in, served over a toasted crumpet (buttered and spread with marmite) with a poached egg on top.

Yum yum yum.
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 8:20, Reply)
Oooooo Heinz beans
That's right posh, if they had been Aldi 1p beans you might have a point.
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 8:22, Reply)
Yeh! Fucking Heinz! Born with a silver dildo up his arse was he?!!

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 8:26, Reply)
I was actually

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 8:27, Reply)
Buzzin

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 8:28, Reply)
hahaha

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 8:28, Reply)
that is 137 different shades of fucking WRONG
baked beans are gross. with marmite? and a skeg on top?

i didn't think you could sicken me more than you already did, but.
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 8:53, Reply)
Marmite with beans is brilliant

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:00, Reply)
go cut out your filthy blaspheming tongue

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:00, Reply)
If you knew what I do with my tongue you wouldnt say that

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:02, Reply)
rubbish, i'd just keep it in a jar by the bed

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:03, Reply)
How would you clean a dogs bum with it there?

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:04, Reply)
i don't even own an dog

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:05, Reply)
Poor lonely spinster ^

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:07, Reply)
if that were the case, i could have one
there's too many people in my life demanding the attention that the dog couldn't get!
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:11, Reply)
Dreadful bullying of Froglet

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 10:21, Reply)
There isn't much that can't be improved by the addition of Marmite
Your missus taught me that when she spread some liberally over her chest
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:01, Reply)
That wasnt marmite
Cleveland Steamer Lulz
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:01, Reply)
haribo sweets
cheesecake
apple pie
lasagne
jacket potatoes
blow jobs
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:02, Reply)
Ooo Marmite Blow jobs for the win

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:04, Reply)
I think Rach is a traditionalist who insists on Bovril for blowjobs

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:05, Reply)
hahaha

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:06, Reply)
A creative chef could incorporate it into any of those things
Apart from maybe the sweets, which could be improved by discarding them and eating some Marmite on toast instead.
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:04, Reply)
I have put marmite into a bolognaise sauce before worked well
Also works in a Dahl
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:05, Reply)
Mmm... I'd spread Marmite on Sophie Dahl

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:16, Reply)
Baked beans are disgusting
Marmite - as a food additive is OK - on toast/bread/cheese it's concentrated hurl-inducing wrongness personified.
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:08, Reply)
a fair description of dozer

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:10, Reply)
Are you suggesting we use Dozer as a food additive?

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:14, Reply)

no, a human sacrifice
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:31, Reply)
Well, obviously THAT.
But should we use him as food afterwards? Seems a waste not to.
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:36, Reply)
christ, imagine putting that in your mouth
bleurgh
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:39, Reply)
Yhcciym

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:39, Reply)
Hi Gonz

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 10:15, Reply)
Sometimes when I'm in a hurry to get the kids supper ready I serve the caviar with shop bought blini instead of homemade.

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 8:25, Reply)
you fucken prole m8
I bet you eat at Pizza Express on special occasions.
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 8:27, Reply)
Only for the free bottle of prosecco

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 8:31, Reply)
plus 'vouchers'

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 8:38, Reply)
You Sir disgust me

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 8:29, Reply)
I eat my peas with honey,
I've done it all my life,
It makes the peas taste funny,
But on the whole the sweet/savoury contrast is quite agreeable once you get over the initial unusual nature of this particular combination of ingredients.
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 8:36, Reply)
honey and parmesan m8, it's the future

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 8:39, Reply)
The Sausage is a cunning bird
With feathers long and wavy
It swims around the frying pan
Until it is ultimately is cooked through and devoured by a nonfoodwrong.
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 8:44, Reply)
you and your fucking peas

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 8:53, Reply)
Don't pretend you don't like tiny green balls.

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 8:55, Reply)
I had shop bought Taste the Difficile fish cakes last night.
They tasted like YM.
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 8:50, Reply)
That buried taste for extra yummy

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 8:52, Reply)
lesson learned by the bbc, commas are important
but it was all over turdbook, so i won't repost it here.

alt: i don't really have any. but when i was at university and i couldn't be bothered to wash the sandwich toaster, i made cheese toasties by melting the cheese in the microwave and pouring it over toast. does that count?
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 8:54, Reply)
Why didnt you just use the grill?

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 8:58, Reply)
it takes longer and it's messier
microwaving the cheese takes 1 minute, whilst the bread is toasting. then pour it over the toast, hey presto, only one plate used.

but i think the main reason was that we had a ropey old death trap of a gas stove, and i was fucking terrified of it. i couldn't use the oven or grill unless oswald was there to risk his eyebrows and do it for me.
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:01, Reply)
Radio 2? What the fuck is wrong with you, grandad?
Alt: Ent had one for years, but I do quite like a pot noodle.
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 8:55, Reply)
Radio 2 or Radio 4
that's the only stations I ever tune in my car, Radio 1 is for cunts and local radio is shit...

Plus they played some Floyd this morning.

I do sometimes tune into radio 3 if its a composer I like
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 8:57, Reply)
'Radio 2 or Radio 4'
Agreed. I sometimes throw in a cheeky Radio 4 extra for the comedy shows.
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 8:59, Reply)
4 extra is for at work
Use their bandwidth not mine
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:00, Reply)
I half listened to that Viv Stanshall doc you mentioned yesterday.

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:02, Reply)
It was fucking brilliant
I just had it on in the background but every so often it would break through, and I would listen for a few minutes.
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:03, Reply)
That's exactly how I listened.
Love the Sir Henry stuff
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:06, Reply)
Great werent it
I think they are doing the Sir Henry stuff as a stand alone on 4 extra as well
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:08, Reply)
'When Sir Henry farted, you cursed double glazing'

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:12, Reply)
There was some fairly decent stuff on R2 in the evenings a few years ago, but then they seemed to have a bit of a reshuffle to push the likes of me over to 6Music.
Got a bit of a soft spot for Desmond Carrington and Jamie Cullum's jazz programme is alright.
But I wouldn't have anything other than Today or R3 in the mornings.
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:00, Reply)
I thought it was a bit odd that they put Mark Radcliffe on the R2 Folk show
Seems to work though. I quite like Bob Harris's Country show too.
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:06, Reply)
I think they were gearing him up for that for a while
He always reported from the Folk Awards and I suspect Mike Harding was a bit of a pain in the arse.
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:08, Reply)
I did hear that MH was a bit prima donna ish

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:11, Reply)
Well ginger werent he...
And we all know what they are like
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:19, Reply)
Just surfed around the web looking for info on Mike Harding
1: Yes, he is/was ginger - I was unaware of this previously, Explains a lot.
2: He's started a podcast/website where he does a show of 'The best in folk, roots and acoustic music' - sound familiar?
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:30, Reply)
I have a recollection of finding his songs funny as a kid
but I couldn't tell you a single one... That said I used to find Jasper Carrot funny as a kid so my judgement may not be reliable
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 10:14, Reply)
Things were different back then

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 10:14, Reply)
So dont tell anyone
and don't put it on the internet, but I have just been remembering Jaspers "Insurance Claims" skit... It is still funny.


But Shhhhhhhh Right
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 10:27, Reply)
Just in case anyone hasn't already realised this, you can disregard anything Swipey says about food.
Shes a massive foodwrong who HPCCIHM
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:02, Reply)
bugger off six toes

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:03, Reply)
Radio?
Alt: pizza base, can of spaghetti bolognese, microwave.
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:17, Reply)
Yes its quite an old form of entertainment

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:19, Reply)
Is that the thing in my car that talks to me when I forget to plug in my mp4 player?

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:21, Reply)
No
That's the Mrs
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:21, Reply)
It's a click from me.

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:22, Reply)
A can of spaghetti bolognese?

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:23, Reply)
That is what I said.

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:28, Reply)
I don't even...

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:29, Reply)
You'd love it.

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:34, Reply)
Dinner of the gods
Pack of smoked back bacon, chips and HP Fruity Sauce. That is all.
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:25, Reply)
Good Lord, has it really come back around to your once a year post on here, b3tz?
Don't forget to start a new thread and then disappear again
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:26, Reply)
Nope it was a one off

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 10:50, Reply)
Pic of Dinner as proof
goo.gl/kDwCl7
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 10:57, Reply)
It was worth coming back just for that

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 10:59, Reply)
my work here is done...
IThankYou
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 11:06, Reply)
There is some algorithm or saink within Spotify radio, where you pick a track you like and it plays others based on that first choice, that somehow always throws in fucking Dodgy.

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:32, Reply)
it's good enough with two, but frog likes it with three...

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:33, Reply)
But how do you get to Dodgy from Joyous? I don't get it :(

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:34, Reply)
Do you have dyed hair like sporters?

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:38, Reply)
No.....
See:
www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post2247286

That's me under the parrot.
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:38, Reply)
do you wear blue eye makeup like Darth does?

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:40, Reply)
Practice!

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:39, Reply)
Looks like I have mastered it.

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:40, Reply)
Beans with chilli flakes, fried nommy chorizo and cheese on a buttery baked potato

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:37, Reply)
I had a great evening kiddy fiddling, thanks.
I've had to dismantle half the car to swap a small 90p rubber grommet. At night! Oh, the lols.

Alt: I don't have any, you grotty little man.
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:37, Reply)
I have never had to do that cos I buy modern cars that work all by themselves

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:38, Reply)
Its been a very good purchase that car

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:47, Reply)
It's been an excellent purchase. I haven't enjoyed a car so much in ages.
But then I like tinkering :)
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:51, Reply)
I agree it would be fun to tinker
However reliable transport is also very useful
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:56, Reply)
Well, it's never broken down on me, so I'd consider that reliable.

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 10:15, Reply)
wasnt it off the road for a month?

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 10:27, Reply)
For an engine replacement, yes.
You fail to acknowledge that I was going to do that anyway.
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 10:30, Reply)
I fail to acknowledge nothing

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 10:48, Reply)
Sounds really boring.

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:51, Reply)
Povvo food guilt
KFC. There. Now I've said it.
I stay away from them because I LOVE KFC. Don't know why, I know it's the most greasy, additive-laden mutant chicken in the universe but it tastes so good!

I'm going to shower now, I feel dirty.
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:40, Reply)
I LOVE KFC, TOO.
I have to restrict myself to twice a year.

I might have it for lunch today.

Thanks, Cap'n!
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:42, Reply)
DON'T DO IT!
That's how it starts! First the KFC, then the track suit, then it's a spiral down into baseball caps, ropey tattoos and Lizzie Duke jewellery.
You'll be ending every sentence with 'Innit' or 'Yeah tho blud' within a week.
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:46, Reply)
I swear down, bruv.

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 9:55, Reply)
Austrian smoked cheese added a supermarket pizza.
Also chicken Kievs with tinned sweetcorn
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 10:12, Reply)
I used to like supermarket pizzas
and pizzas in general, but I cant stand the smell of them now... for my shame the only ones I can eat are from a vegetarian restaurant in Ambleside with pesto and pine nuts :( sad times
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 10:28, Reply)
Come over to the yurt side

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 10:36, Reply)
Its actually a place I would recommend for all food wrongs
got a cinema attached and they do a deal for ticket to a film and 2 course meal for about £16 and the food is very good
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 10:48, Reply)
Aren't them chicken things susceptible to the bottom part being stolen?

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 10:44, Reply)
topical

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 10:49, Reply)
I will sit and eat a jar of pickled onions in one sitting.
See also: Coleslaw, packet deli meat, pot noodles.
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 10:49, Reply)
Oh, and blow jobs. I didn't realise they were a povvo thing?

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 10:50, Reply)
Only if you are selling them for a fiver

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 11:00, Reply)
Ohhh... Ok.

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 11:06, Reply)
inflation is a terrible thing

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 11:06, Reply)
McDonalds, KFC, Burger King, you name it
I'm a fan of terrible greasy food, so I make sure I eat it as little as possible.

EDIT: Alternatively, until I was 17, I used to only eat steak well done.
(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 10:55, Reply)
I had a greasy egg, bacon and sausage bap today. I feel dirty.

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 11:06, Reply)
Nothing wrong with them every once in a while

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 11:28, Reply)
Alt. For breakfast, lunch and dinner?

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 11:07, Reply)
you're still 17 aren't you?

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 11:07, Reply)
+ stone

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 11:12, Reply)
12 at the moment, want to drop another stone in the coming months

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 11:28, Reply)
No, that's just how old I was when I learned how much better steak was when you didn't cook the shit out of it.

(, Wed 26 Mar 2014, 11:28, Reply)

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