OK we need a new thread
A search is being launched for Britons whose ancestors fought at Waterloo
www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-30773030
So ancestors, have any of them done something you feel proud/bad/ idiotic enough that you could share with us?

Alt: I feel the time of year is fast approaching when you can actually start to do something constructive and stop hiding out in front of the fire, so what can you do?

Alt:alt: Cakes, what is the best and worse cake?
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:37, 115 replies, latest was 9 years ago)

cake is cake

( d.r._and_quinch when will you be famous?, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:38, Reply)

No....NO IT'S NOT
I'm more of a savoury than sweet person but a coffee and walnut cake is a little slice of heaven to me

I only added the cake bit because...well you know /ot being foodies and fat bastards = input
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:43, Reply)

bit needy mate

(old man river possible lesbian, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:46, Reply)

gosh coffee and walnut us actually my favourite but not those shop bought monstrosities.
I go out more in winter than summer.
( d.r._and_quinch when will you be famous?, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:47, Reply)

Home made or GTFO
See cake isn't just cake
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 16:01, Reply)

alright fella you cannot force me to watch choccywoccydodah

( d.r._and_quinch when will you be famous?, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 16:04, Reply)

Kroney relatives did.
I'm organising a stag do

I like a properly matured homemade fruit cake. I do not like sponge.
( Peej, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:38, Reply)

Stag do, nice one what is the plan so far?
alt:alt: I'm sure GJ will be glad to hear this
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:40, Reply)

I offered my wife £50 to do a strip
I even said she could keep her pants on but she told me to fuck off.

I have made no plan so far other than not to do what was done for the last few because I would like to do something a bit different to dress up stupidly and go paintballing/gokarting/brewery tour. I am also not going to do any of those stupid Stag weeks that seem so popular.

Any suggestions? I'm thinking get out of the county so its an all new night out find a good gig and stay overnight maybe with some sort of "activity" thrown in
( Peej, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:45, Reply)

Drinking is an activity
Just do that
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:47, Reply)

Good plan!
I enjoyed the paintballing at mine, it started early enough that we had plenty of time left for drinking.
( Peej, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:49, Reply)

Last time I went paintballing I'd accidentally worn a t-shirt with a target on

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:56, Reply)

worn a t-shirt with a target on got blinded by Debbie and Amanda after foolishly removing my safety goggles
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 16:02, Reply)

Blackpool or a Soho sausaging fest

( d.r._and_quinch when will you be famous?, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:48, Reply)

go somewhere interesting and get pissed
Dunno which cunt thought a stag do should be like a corporate team building event but they can fuck off
(old man river possible lesbian, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:50, Reply)

Fucking right they can.
Pricks
( Peej, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:52, Reply)

it was probably the owner of a paintballing and go-karting franchise in Doncaster

(old man river possible lesbian, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:53, Reply)

I once posted a link to a survival weekend thing in Cornland or North Devon
Sporters quite liked it, I suppose I could try and find it through search
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:54, Reply)

what does the stag like?
my colleague went caving on his. another went to one of those overnight murder mystery evenings in an hotel. festival? music gig? beer fest?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 16:01, Reply)

probably like drink drugs and whores like normal men. I like whores.

( d.r._and_quinch when will you be famous?, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 16:02, Reply)

Your colleagues sound like pricks.
Caving? Murder mystery? Fucking hell.
( Muns, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 16:23, Reply)

dweebier than psychochomp

(old man river possible lesbian, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 16:39, Reply)

you're a bit obsessed with him
just set up a profile with a female username, it'd be easier
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 16:47, Reply)

It's ok. I don't want to suck his dick or owt.

(old man river possible lesbian, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 17:00, Reply)

you must be properly fucking up his vanity searches

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 17:23, Reply)

Chompy sucks off the homeless for free copies of "The Big Issue"
HTH?
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 17:33, Reply)

I've certainly made the populol page a bit single track

(old man river possible lesbian, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 17:44, Reply)

My grandmother worked in Bomber Command.
Technically she's portrayed in The Dambusters.

My dad spilled soup on Francis Crick.

I once touched Britt Ekland's elbow.

Alt: I don't like to be indoors for too long - I get cabin fever after about 6 hours.

Alt: Lyle's Golden Syrup Cake.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:40, Reply)

So who was the blue hairy paedo old man wickers was crying about?

(Captain Give-A-Fuck #internetpals4eva, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:40, Reply)

his username was noonegivesatinyfuck

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:43, Reply)

You've confused him with Chompy.

( Muns, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:45, Reply)

it could apply to so many people

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:46, Reply)

Whoah! Free gobjob round the bins for noonegivesatinyfuck!
What a result for that paedo fuck
(Captain Give-A-Fuck #internetpals4eva, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:46, Reply)

confused him with noshed off
(old man river possible lesbian, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:47, Reply)

relay.cr3ation.co.uk/questions/offtopic/post2444236
(old man river possible lesbian, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:48, Reply)

Jaysus! How many names does this guy have?
I guess when the hounds are on the paedo hunt you gotta be on your toes with the fake identities and whatnot
(Captain Give-A-Fuck #internetpals4eva, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:45, Reply)

I like parkin and jaffa cakes.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:42, Reply)

hooray a food thread we haven't had one of those in AGES

(old man river possible lesbian, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:44, Reply)

my grandmother's family had a greengrocers in halifax that had the first motorised business vehicle in the town
that is as good as it gets for me.

alt: not allowed to light the fire any more, in case a budgie lands on it.

altalt: cake sucks. the only acceptable cake is lemon drizzle, preferably with a proper icing. other than that, no thanks.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:44, Reply)

my childhood budgie managed to land in the chip pan, the oil was cool but excess oil really is not good for a bird's feathers.

( d.r._and_quinch when will you be famous?, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:52, Reply)

bloody lucky the oil was cooking though, imagine the trauma to quinch junior otherwise
they are not very bright. our childhood one saw something shiny at the bottom of my mother's thermos and squeezed itself inside. fortunately the coffee had all been drunk, but the drops at the bottom stained its head brown until its next moult.

at which point it stuck its head in some kind of cream and promptly dyed itself yellow.

#birddeathwish
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:59, Reply)

don't think that they are stupid, inquisitive is the word.

( d.r._and_quinch when will you be famous?, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 16:12, Reply)

i've had 2 in the past
one was inquisitive, you are right. the other was..... there are no words other than "fucking thick".
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 16:14, Reply)

"Birdbrained"

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 16:16, Reply)

youtu.be/eEIb5Xrf81g
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 16:18, Reply)

I had a great uncle who was a "driver in the SS". Course you were, sunshine.
The SS had loads of it's own drivers.

My Mum's dad was a carpenter and made Messerschmitt wings.

None of which is Waterloo-centric.

Alt: YM. Hard and fast in the dirt box.

Altalt: Pineapple cream cake BECAUSE IT IS.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:45, Reply)

you sick disgusting bastard
pineapple cream??????
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:46, Reply)

I'm calling bullshit on all of this
and I honestly believe you don't have a leg to stand on
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:48, Reply)

All true, mein Fuhrer.
Mt grandmother also cleaned Belsen when she was 18 or 19 when the Allies were approaching.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 16:02, Reply)

You misspelled it
BELLENDS it what she cleaned
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 16:05, Reply)

Nope, just a bunch of no bodies
alt: I have taught myself how to drystone wall, so I could repair the garden wall that was knocked apart by wild Exmoor ponies (fucking shits)

alt2: I like ginger cake best of all had Jamaican ginger cake as my wedding cake it had a lot of rum in it
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:45, Reply)

blah blah great etc grandfather is Admiral Thomas Cochrane, 10th Earl of Dundonald, blah blah another one in the charge of the light brigade blah blah boar war blah zulus blah blah mentioned in several books and on a stamp too blah blah
went on to lose all the family riches searching for gold in Chile, cheers
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:46, Reply)

Fucking hell one year older and you've turned into a right grumpy bastard
No wonder swipe got herself a new single bed for her half of the flat
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:49, Reply)

quarter

(old man river possible lesbian, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:50, Reply)

I though I'd said it all before, no need to bully me online m8 :(

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:51, Reply)

Sozz...you want a hug?

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:56, Reply)

Not from a bully, I know how they end. Either with my head being flushed down the toilet or male rape. Or both. I've learnt my lesson.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:58, Reply)

You really should stop hanging out with Monty and Stunned.

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 16:01, Reply)

They are the prototype 'Strangers' I was told not to talk to at school.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 16:04, Reply)

DANGER!

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 16:13, Reply)

Thomas Cochrane, inspiration for Jack Aubrey of Patrick O'Brien's Aubrey and Maturin series
itself inspiration for that Master and Commander film what had that gladiator chap in it.
( Kroney, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:56, Reply)

That's the chap.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:57, Reply)

I am surprised his head fit on a stamp!

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 16:03, Reply)

My mum kindly bought some baby pictures up at the weekend to show Swipe. Massive head was still intact. I guess I was about 9 when I finally grew into it.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 16:06, Reply)

you must have been a c-section baby

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 16:15, Reply)

Ouch!
The thought of that makes my minge hurt.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 16:22, Reply)

My dad purchased a guitar from Alvin Stardust.
Unfortunately, it didn't stop him.
( Muns, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:49, Reply)

My my

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:53, Reply)

Oh yeah.

(old man river possible lesbian, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:54, Reply)

My grandfather met general macArthur or Eisenhower or Patton.
Whoever it was, he thought him a god-awful, arrogant Yankee prick. He also met Rudolf Hess during his incarceration in Spandau; conversely he thought the Nazi was a thoroughly good chap, aside from "all that unpleasantness."
( Kroney, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:54, Reply)

I take it that was before Hess made good his escape through the barricades

(Captain Give-A-Fuck #internetpals4eva, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:56, Reply)

According to my Grandmother, Feild Marshall Montgomery was a bit of a prick

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 16:00, Reply)

not as much of a prick as Field Marshall Dozington-Smythe (Ret.)

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 16:01, Reply)

Dozer ent a prick
You take that back
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 16:03, Reply)

YOU take THAT back!

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 16:11, Reply)

It's simple logic, we all know the odd prick
but are they that bad to be compared to Dozer?........Yeah see, I told you so.
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 16:14, Reply)

No she said she enjoyed a bit of his prick

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 16:15, Reply)

my great grandad or sutin worked at the shipyard where Titanic was built
It was prolly his fault it sank lol
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 15:59, Reply)

FAO oldmanriver
Erasure are still recording, FYI
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 16:01, Reply)

Vince Clark also makes banging techno with Martin Gore

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 16:02, Reply)

needs less techno

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 16:04, Reply)

the world needs as much po-faced panel-beating techno as possible

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 16:05, Reply)

I have heard this

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 16:10, Reply)

VCMG
You wouldn't like it.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 16:13, Reply)

I like techno.
Surgeon and Lady starlight opened for Lady Gaga.
It was rather bangin'
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 16:35, Reply)

Surgeon is excellent.
Do you know his British Murder Boys stuff?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 16:37, Reply)

Is that before he became leader of the SNP

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 17:02, Reply)

you tell him.

( d.r._and_quinch when will you be famous?, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 16:09, Reply)

(I actually thought their last, Richard X album was superb)

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 16:10, Reply)

I was defeated, you won the war

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Mon 12 Jan 2015, 17:04, Reply)