kleenex
It might not seem like much, but one's passage into manhood is a powerful and significant event. I remember my first masturbatory event as if it were last night looking at Keely Hazell with a pen torch while my wife slept instead of 20 years ago with an illicit poster of Samantha Fox.

The other boys at school were al talking about it and I was a late starter. What did those curious hand movements mean, and what was 'spunk'? It took a tutorial of sorts from Richard Gummer (a funny-smelling boy who lived with his grandma in a caravan next to the sewage farm) for me to get the gist.

That portentous night, I readied myself with a boner, Sam Fox and some tissues. I whacked away at my virgin meat for what seemed like ages until a tiny drop of translucent liquid jumped forth - just a tiny amount and no doubt bereft of sperm from my hairless and still dormant testes. But I mopped that drop up and I have kept the tissue ever since, sealed in a glass box to remember my first sexual act.

I still look at that box sometimes and I plan to give it to my future son as a symbol of my fertility. "Here, son - here is the first squirt of jis I ever expelled. It could have been you, but Sam Fox needed it more." Since then, I must have squirted enough to repopulate Europe after WWII, but I'll never forget that first tentative tug.
(frankspencer, Thu 8 May 2008, 17:30, 6 replies)

I hate to say it
but I believe you.

Mainly as I did the same thing.
( disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Thu 8 May 2008, 17:44, closed)

Ah Memories.
I kept my first ejaculation too.
It was over Doreen from Tulse Hill in a copy of Fiesta Readers wives. I didnt mean to defile the publication quite like that, but my mother was coming up the stairs and I needed to hide the evidence quickly, so I opted for decorating the page, rather than ejaculating into my cupped hand and the ensuing penguin walk to the bathroom which would've rather given the game away.

Good to see you back, how was the chlamydia clinic?
(Vic Flange, Thu 8 May 2008, 18:57, closed)

Cheryl Ladd for me.
Or was it Misty Rowe? I watched both "Charlie's Angels" and "Hee Haw", so it could have been either...
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Thu 8 May 2008, 20:12, closed)

Aah, memories

My own first experience in the early 80's was with a copy of Razzle (classy) and contained some of the hairiest growlers ever seen.

I kept that copy for a good few years.
( Stu71 ....bad money dies, I love the scene, Fri 9 May 2008, 8:24, closed)

Yuck...
I hope you're joking......please be joking....

Clicks anyway.
(Pork2311, Fri 9 May 2008, 12:50, closed)

frankspencer


i missed your stories :D

be they true or fake.
(Kuja335, Fri 9 May 2008, 21:37, closed)