From the New Sports for Toffs challenge. See all 248 entries (closed)

(hamchicken&peas works for nuts, Tue 22 Feb 2005, 15:31, archived)

Woo


Any one else got any suggestions?
www.b3ta.com/talk/344339

Cheers
(Ssco, Tue 22 Feb 2005, 15:33, archived)

just make sure you set your e-mail "out of office" message........

( Reckless_Rik, Tue 22 Feb 2005, 15:34, archived)

say how much
you have enjoyed working with everyone and wish them all lots of luck in the future.
In emails, no one can hear you being sarcastic.
( Vladimir, Tue 22 Feb 2005, 15:36, archived)

Just write
"Whilst you're reading this I'm fucking your wife"
(WARNING: This name may contain the word CUNT, Tue 22 Feb 2005, 15:37, archived)

I've shat in the cistern.
Enjoy!
( charliedontsurf, Tue 22 Feb 2005, 15:37, archived)

Surely, the coffee pot ...

( Hagbard - Mario Kart DS Code in profile, Tue 22 Feb 2005, 15:39, archived)

www.b3ta.com/talk/344354
(Ssco, Tue 22 Feb 2005, 15:42, archived)

Top deck the cistern.
It'll take them ages to find out, and they'll have brown water for weeks.
( charliedontsurf, Tue 22 Feb 2005, 15:45, archived)

"Dear former workmates

As i depart, i would like to relate to you a touching poem i stumbled across on the internet that i believe sums up our relationship over all these years.

'Badger badger badger badger,
Badger badger badger badger,
Badger badger badger badger,
Mushroom, mushroom
Badger badger badger badger,
Badger badger badger badger,
Badger badger badger badger,
Mushroom, mushroom
Aah, it's a snake, ooh it's a snake'

Thank you."
( Yeknom. Incontinence and Premature ejaculation? Easy come, easy go., Tue 22 Feb 2005, 15:43, archived)

Yes,
This

( Flowerpot watches through the railings as they play, Tue 22 Feb 2005, 15:47, archived)

OR
Vanish one day without telling anyone, don't clear out your desk, never contact anyone again, apart from one person you had a passing aquaintance with, send them the following e-mail.

"It may be too late by the time you recieve this, they're onto me, they're after you too. Trust no one, if they come for you, just run."
( Yeknom. Incontinence and Premature ejaculation? Easy come, easy go., Tue 22 Feb 2005, 15:48, archived)

i've asked this before but how do you stop eating custard creams?

( lemony, Tue 22 Feb 2005, 15:35, archived)

By moving on to bourbons

( tipassoi, Tue 22 Feb 2005, 15:36, archived)

But how
do you get off the bourbons?
( Chrico is a bounder and a cad, Tue 22 Feb 2005, 15:39, archived)

by moving onto crack

( Yeknom. Incontinence and Premature ejaculation? Easy come, easy go., Tue 22 Feb 2005, 15:41, archived)

Which sort?

( Rev. Cleo has a book shelf, would like another, Fri 25 Feb 2005, 23:47, archived)

mouth amputation
is the only way
( viperrr mostly comes out at night, mostly, Tue 22 Feb 2005, 15:37, archived)

share them with friends
nothing else will work. You're condemned to eat the whole packet.
( rob You should follow me http://twitter.com/robmanuel, Tue 22 Feb 2005, 15:37, archived)

It is unwise to do this
suddenly. Get a prescription from your GP to wean yourself off them - maybe two packets of Garibaldis a day.

EDIT - I love the fact that everyone has a plan for this one!!
( Vladimir, Tue 22 Feb 2005, 15:37, archived)

we all know from bitter experience
I started on the custard creams, but it was a slippery slope.
I thought I could take them, that I knew my limits.
But then, one day, a "friend" offered me a fig roll. And before long, fuig rolls led me towards gingersnaps, hobnobs, and even *shudder* McVitties Raspberry and white chocolate cookies. Oh, the shame...
( tipassoi, Tue 22 Feb 2005, 15:41, archived)

oh fucksocks
i've just realised that i have some chocolate hobnobs in the cupboard
( lemony, Tue 22 Feb 2005, 15:44, archived)

i've got some fucking jaffa cakes i my pocket
oh mummy, oh daddy, let's all play kabaddi
( clorey mcnuggety, Tue 22 Feb 2005, 15:49, archived)

Mmmm.
Raspberry and white choclate from Millies.
( charliedontsurf, Tue 22 Feb 2005, 15:48, archived)

Finish the packet
.... and don't ever go near them again!
(WARNING: This name may contain the word CUNT, Tue 22 Feb 2005, 15:38, archived)

cold turkey
takes the taste away
( spacehog see my photos at http://tinyurl.com/marks-snaps, Tue 22 Feb 2005, 15:40, archived)

imagine the middle is baby sick

(hamchicken&peas works for nuts, Tue 22 Feb 2005, 15:42, archived)

mmm, baby sick
*scoffs custard creams*
Damn, only custard flavour gunk.
( tipassoi, Tue 22 Feb 2005, 15:44, archived)

i used the baby sick tactic
to stop eating milky bars

it works for loads of food stuffs
(hamchicken&peas works for nuts, Tue 22 Feb 2005, 15:47, archived)

hmm
I used it to stop eating babies...
(TSGarp, Fri 25 Feb 2005, 21:50, archived)

pffft!

( twig has new glasses, Tue 22 Feb 2005, 15:37, archived)

compo it
woo
( Nonny Mouse. -- Scared as a Shitting Scorpion, Tue 22 Feb 2005, 15:37, archived)