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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Oh my dayz, I was out getting my haircut from my local hair dressers who gave me a hair cut when it was all nice and sunny.
So then I thought "I will put my jacket into my local cleaners" and they charged me 」6.50 and I can pick up my item on thursday. I then went into my local waitrose where me me me, i i i, blah blah blah.... ended up walking home in hail storms and getting cuts from them.
(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:03, Reply)
I got hit on the ear three times in exactly the same spot by hail
it's like it was aiming for me.
(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:16, Reply)
or you have massive ears?

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:21, Reply)
I do have an elephant like feature,
but it's not my ears.
(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:23, Reply)
Grey tail?

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:23, Reply)
I never forget.

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:24, Reply)
Forget what?

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:33, Reply)
You have a huge, grey arse?

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:23, Reply)
Indian men use me to move logs.

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:25, Reply)
Is this not Kroney?

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:25, Reply)
Tusks?
It's tusks, right?
(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:24, Reply)
Flat feet?

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:24, Reply)
One of your closest evolutionary ancestors is a manatee?

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:25, Reply)
Oh, the huge etc....

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:26, Reply)
Is you African?
Or is you Indian?
(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:25, Reply)
Hannibal led a load of you over the Alps?

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:26, Reply)
I love it when a plan comes together

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:26, Reply)
You're scared of mice?

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:26, Reply)
You're all wrong,
I was heavily implying I have a large penis.
(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:29, Reply)
NSFW
www.youtube.com/watch?v=rEGVH4IQ2nA
(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:29, Reply)
Upon the death of your mother by a hunter,
you were chased by the hunter. You escaped, and in the process left the jungle, visited a big city, and returned to bring the benefits of civilization to your fellow elephants. Just as you returned to your community of elephants, your king died from eating a bad mushroom. Because of your travels and civilization, you were immediately appointed king of the elephant kingdom. You married your cousin, and you then had children and taught them valuable lessons???
(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:29, Reply)
I used to love barbar

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:30, Reply)
With your heavily implied large penis, no doubt.

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:31, Reply)
There's something about a green suit that does it for me.

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:32, Reply)
Hang on!
That was blue a minute ago!
(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:34, Reply)
You must be colour blind.

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:35, Reply)
You in your lucky green suit.

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:38, Reply)
*sings*
Goodbye my Coney Island girrrrrrrrrrl
(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:33, Reply)
OMG
You too?
(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:30, Reply)
Babar?

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:30, Reply)
Babar

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:32, Reply)
ba-barber-anne

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:38, Reply)
I fucking love that record.

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:39, Reply)
You have catastrophic taste in music.

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:41, Reply)
No I don't.
Not like you with your Sacha Distel and Serge Gainsbourg shit.
(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:42, Reply)
Vanessa Paradis
reinvented music. All of it. What a woman. Joie le taxi hahahaha classic.
(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:44, Reply)
I'd reinvent her music if you know what I mean.
She'd have to call 'Joe le Taxi' because she'd be unable to walk.
(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:48, Reply)
I'M SAYING I WOULD LIKE PHYSICAL CONGRESS WITH HER.

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:50, Reply)
I'VE CHANGED MY MIND. YOU CAN HAVE HER.

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:51, Reply)
mmmmmm
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Vanessa_Paradis_24-01-2012.jpg
(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:50, Reply)
Oh Jesus Christ.
*withers*
(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:51, Reply)
Yeah, I won't if you don't mind.

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 17:09, Reply)
I'm sorry, you're committed now. You have to.

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 17:21, Reply)
A new low.

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 17:23, Reply)
Jimmy Hill.

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 17:25, Reply)
my gf is a massive beach boys fan
i got her some of their original records for christmas, framed em and put them up in her place
(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:42, Reply)
I love their earlier surfing stuff.
The vocal harmonies have the same effect on me that choral music does on Christian gaylords.
(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:43, Reply)
i like good vibrations, she likes god only knows
we've reached an impasse
(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:44, Reply)
Punch her in the clopper.
Did you know that the 3-odd minutes of Good Vibrations was edited and revised down repeatedly from what was originally about 9 mins of music?

I think this is true, mind you I was told this by my father in about 1982 and it might be bollocks.
(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:46, Reply)
just looked it up, a lot of work went into it either way
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Good_Vibrations
(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:51, Reply)
Indeed:
'The production of the song is reported to have spanned seventeen recording sessions at four different recording studios, and used over 90 hours of magnetic recording tape, with an eventual budget of $50,000'

Worth every cent I reckon.
(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:53, Reply)
Nick Kent's Brian Wilson interviews are very sad indeed to read.
He was not a good advert for LSD.
(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:54, Reply)
WOWIE!!!

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:51, Reply)
No, his was 'Ziggy Stardust'

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:53, Reply)
I love how with all the stories you know, _this_ is the one you question it's validity on.

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:55, Reply)
hahaha, clicking dis

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:58, Reply)
:(

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 17:04, Reply)
<3 u !!!!!

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 18:19, Reply)
Ah, that's how Stunned broke your sofa, then

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:45, Reply)
What, 'sofa surfing'?

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:47, Reply)
Is it your penis that you're implying? Because I reckon thats why elephants have trunks, so they can get blowjobs.
A guraff once tried to go down on me, couldn't get all the way in.
(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:34, Reply)
They wouldn't need such long trunks if they didn't have such small cocks.
Thought for the day, there.
(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:35, Reply)
I was implying the size of my penis yes.

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:38, Reply)
Say what you like about Gonz, he's fucking SHARP.

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:40, Reply)
I don't know how you expect me to compete with that, mine barely scales to a pony.
Would you promise me one thing, just one.... that you'll never go in beyond 10 inches, 12 on your birthday. I'd like some tire on the tracks when I take her out for a ride.
(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:45, Reply)
I'm going to link her to this post.

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:46, Reply)
Tred on the tire, not tire on the tracks.
Oh god, I hate to think what you think of me after that mistake =S
(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:47, Reply)
I never did see such a thing, it was bright and sunny and then KAPLOWIE, it was hailing like I've never seen it.

(, Tue 15 May 2012, 16:29, Reply)

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