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This is a question Off Topic

Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.

(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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right. i am related to the beverley sisters.
and i totally met boris johnson once. brayndedd's aunt is married to pete burn's paedo [forgotten which relative].

obscure claims to fame. GO!!
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:22, 169 replies, latest was 12 years ago)
Someone I used to wrok with used to go on caravanning holidays with Gary Glitter.

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:25, Reply)
the kindle for travelling you made was a fair one, damn you
but i can't bring myself to do it. IT'S NOT A BOOK.

claims to fame? er. liam gallagher once signed my shirt. that is really as good as it gets.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:25, Reply)
you know it makes sense.
plus, you can download loads of porn and nobody need know.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:29, Reply)
i am the kind of spastic who would forget to charge it
and it would die when i had 3 pages left.

i say read your porn and be proud. bonus points if you get people to tut or to fall in the pool trying to read it over your shoulder.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:31, Reply)
oh, i do.
but i heart my kindle. it's much comfier for reading in bed as well.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:36, Reply)
you have downloaded fifty shades of mummy porn, haven't you?

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:41, Reply)
of course.
that and 120 days of sodom.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:18, Reply)
Went to the same school as an England rugby international, and the bishop that married Jug-Ears and Dashboard Face.
Also the same place a Walkers advert was filmed.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:26, Reply)
I once pissed on Noel Gallagher's shoe.
I have so many of these that I have trotted out too many times by far so I'll sit this one out and do you all a favour.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:27, Reply)
i decided a man was mark radcliffe last thursday.
it wasn't mark radcliffe.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:30, Reply)
I can't help myself.
MUST....DROP....NAMES........
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:32, Reply)

NAMES PANTS
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:32, Reply)

PANTS ACID
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:38, Reply)
yours is better
will be thinking of you on sat - am going to the uk's biggest vinyl shop!
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:42, Reply)
Oh aye?

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:52, Reply)
aye! is in manchester
near afflecks palace. where i haven't been since i was about 15.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:54, Reply)
My dad's cousin is kind of famous in America
and lives in Beverly Hills. Most excitingly she lived next door to Ozzy Osbourne.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:28, Reply)
oh and I was in a band with the bassist from Athlete
(the school band)
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:29, Reply)
I bet the school band was better.

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:29, Reply)
My Brother in Law is David Tennant's cousin

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:30, Reply)
My mate Gary shagged Melinda Messenger

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:31, Reply)
did he tell her he had a package for her?

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:37, Reply)
With the help of the boys from The Herbaliser, I once stole some hash off Grooverider.

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:31, Reply)
If only you'd stolen all of it he might not have been arrested.

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:34, Reply)
This will haunt me til the day I die.

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:35, Reply)
I once winded Prince 'Wills'

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:31, Reply)
Roger Taylor told me me band was great when I was 17

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:31, Reply)
My mate Tony won the ITF world DJ championships once

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:31, Reply)
Bob Holness told me off

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:32, Reply)
.....before playing a haunting sax solo

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:32, Reply)
Just to make it perfectly clear, the film I mentioned....
I did not in anyway download it using file sharing software from jaybob on isohunt.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:35, Reply)
Glad to hear it, that wouldn't be fair at all.

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:36, Reply)
ARRRRrrrrrrrrhhhhhhhh
Down with pirates
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:37, Reply)
this is my favourite internet lie of all time.

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:37, Reply)
What for?

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:45, Reply)
My brother is best mates with Neil Buchanan of Marseille fame.

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:33, Reply)
LIES

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:33, Reply)
OH FFS AA YOU FUCKIN LIAR.

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:36, Reply)
The wife is friends with Frank Turner

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:33, Reply)
...whose father eats his Xmas dinner at my mother's house every year.

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:36, Reply)
good.
can you get her to tell him that when he goes on stage at beautiful days friday week he is to tell all his wanky hipster fanboys to shut the fuck up?
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:39, Reply)
Me and Pete Wiggs from St Etienne once nicked a bottle of vodka from a bar in Camden
and then drank it in the street, wearing monkey masks.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:33, Reply)

I am Gail Porter's hairbrush.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:35, Reply)
I'm glad they cut this line from Fight Club, it would've been a bit insensitive

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:38, Reply)

book was shit, film was worse.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:41, Reply)
Film was shit ... there's a BOOK?
:(
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:51, Reply)
the woman from the new owners is ropey as fuck
i mean, she's got this growth on the side of her forehead, looks like a faceboob
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:35, Reply)
Not much of a claim to fame there.
Poor Q

:o(
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:39, Reply)
faceboob is the next big thing mont, you're so ancient

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:45, Reply)
my grandma once got pissed and fell on her stone fireplace
we went to see her in hospital and she had a big black cartoon lump that looked exactly like a dick. my mum and i could not stop laughing; poor old grandma got really pissed off with us.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:48, Reply)
you were still tempted to suck it, weren't you?

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:49, Reply)
jesus
a new low, even for you.

well done.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:59, Reply)
I once kicked Ex-England international football player
Andy Cole in the bollocks, Trustory
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:36, Reply)
I like this.

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:37, Reply)
He didn't

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:38, Reply)
I am mates with a drummer
Who had a UK top 20 and two UK top 40 hits in 2004-05 as well and an album that reached number 14 in the UK album charts. I am Godfather to his niece.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:36, Reply)
feeder?
i thought he killed himself.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:38, Reply)
No, that's her parents job, surely?

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:46, Reply)
i used to be taught history by the bass player from The Jennifers,
After he left they went on to become Supergrass.

I'm in over my head here, they guy I'm here to be a witness for was proper on the steal, he didn't tell me half the stuff that has come out in this hearing, I really don't want to be associated with him in front of the boss here.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:38, Reply)
Shit, dog. That's not fair is it? Wot a cunt.

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:40, Reply)
'The Luggage' has broken out the badass ignore function, and is totally ignoring my ass
Remember kids don't remind him of his virginity, that causes upset
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:38, Reply)
How do you know?

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:46, Reply)
Shit, he's ignoring me too.
THIS NEW IGNORE SYSTEM IS SHIT!!!!
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:48, Reply)

I was lectured in petrology by the drummer out of Coldplay's dad...
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:38, Reply)
Cleavage ftw!

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 15:38, Reply)

yes, he was quite tubby
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 15:53, Reply)

Sorry, that was rubbish - I just got excited by you mentioning petrology!
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 16:31, Reply)
my dad's cousin was on a professional baseball team for a season
I met Gavin DeGraw a few times
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:38, Reply)
i am friends with Thom Yorkes wife,
We often go to parties at his house. He is a grumpy, but lovely man.
Jeremy Paxman used to sit at the bar in a restaurant I worked in and we'd do the crossword together.
My band did a brief tour of south england supporting The Birthday Massacre, and met a host of people along the way, including Nikki Sixx and Slash.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:42, Reply)
If you've never made an 'eye for the ladies' joke at his expense
then I'm not sure we can be friends any more.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:43, Reply)
i've been in a fight with the singer
from dry the river
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:42, Reply)
My grandfather was the star witness in the Sex Pistols 'bollocks' trial.


'WE KNOW, MONTY, SHUT UP PLEASE'
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:42, Reply)
I dated Kevin Whateleys daughter at lower school for like a week.

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:43, Reply)
Was she aware of this?

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:44, Reply)
Yes we held hands and EVERYTHING

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:45, Reply)
I was in the same class
as the drummer from Gorky Zygotic Mynci
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:43, Reply)
Chris Evans called me a cunt.
Feris Bueller is a cunt and his coked up agent tried to start a fight with me.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:44, Reply)
Apparently I served some guy
who was in Twin Town when I worked in a photo lab. I didn't recognise him. I think it was the one with sideburns
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:45, Reply)
I often invite simon weston over for dinner
*May not be true*
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:46, Reply)
Every night is Burns Night round the Weston's.

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:47, Reply)
I am the last person that Magnuss Magnusson said "I've started so I'll finish" to.
Well, on television, anyway. He might have said it to his wife at some point after that, I suppose.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:46, Reply)
I've sucked the tits of the frontman from Electric Head Funk's mum.

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:46, Reply)
I've revolted myself here.

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:46, Reply)
luckily it seems that everyone else is a flouncing whingebaby who has you on LOLIGNORE

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:47, Reply)
Phew.

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:47, Reply)
i'm pretty revolted too
everyone knows it's your mum's girlfriend with the decent rack
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:48, Reply)
Pfff, hardly. Fuck all there, Q - fuck all.

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:50, Reply)
was it a bad night?

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:48, Reply)
My mate's sister's ex boyfriend
is the guy who played Loki in The Avengers
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:47, Reply)
My Mum's cousins' ex-husband's cousin
Is Craig McLachlan. But you probably already know that.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:49, Reply)
I've met Suede a bunch of times
Including one occasion when I threw up down myself in front of Richard Oakes and Neil Codling after an evening of Jaegermeisters.
I also met Sharlene Spiteri and Lars Ulrich. That's about it.
Oh, I met hardcore legend Mick Foley earlier in the year, but that because I was there to watch his show.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:51, Reply)
Brett Anderson turned up at my mate's party
at 5am wearing a dressing gown. Everyone was leaving.

He sat on the sofa being ignored and refused to take the hint that the party was over.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:53, Reply)
Ha, weird
I thought Suede were great.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:57, Reply)
My friend Kim roadied for them for a few years.
Apparently when Brett gave up cocaine, he tried to insist that all the crew did the same. They told him in no uncertain terms to get fucked.

I have to say I can't stand the band.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:59, Reply)
I did hear a rumour once that people like different things
I think it's bullshit myself. Everyone should just like what I like, then we don't need to argue.
Nah, they're not everyone's cup of tea. I guess I just preferred them to a lot of other contemporary british bands at the time.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:02, Reply)
As Arbiter of Taste for the whole world, I couldn't agree less.
I was into different stuff in those years, I suppose.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:05, Reply)
Life's rich tapestry

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:11, Reply)
Mick Foley is ace, a friend of mine sent me a picture of him shaking Mick's hand recently
I could have killed him.

My friend, obviously, not Mick. Any man that falls off a cell and gets back up is fucking insane
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:59, Reply)
I touched him with my mortal hand
I've got a picture of me, him and Mr Socko together. Oh so proud.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:00, Reply)
That's quite cool.

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:01, Reply)
I went to see his stand up with Internet Sensation™ and /talk mod Manolith
It was really good. You needed to have a bit of rasslin' knowledge, but it was still funny.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:03, Reply)
I was quite tempted, but I was very skint when he toured near me, sadly.

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:05, Reply)
Manolith toured near you???
Cool.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:06, Reply)
Mick Foley, I mean.

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:07, Reply)
Yeah, Manolith will only tour the Benelux nations
Tax dodge apparently
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:09, Reply)
My P.E. teacher was roommates with Seb Coe at Loogabarooga University

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:50, Reply)
SEBASTIAN COE? I HATE SEBASTIAN COE

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:51, Reply)
He signed autographs at school sports day back in t'eighties

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:52, Reply)
I heart Sebastian Coe.
He's done wonders for London and the UK as a whole.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:53, Reply)

www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/doctorwho/articles/At-Long-Last-Here-It-Is
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:07, Reply)
fuck off bollocks he's a cunt.

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:21, Reply)
Seb Coe used to be my MP
Cunt
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:03, Reply)
WHAT ABOUT BARRIPPER HARBOUR
FIX IT ITS FUCKED.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:18, Reply)
My friend Richard bullied Brian Molko of Placebo at a party, until he cried.

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:53, Reply)
I imagine it didn't take a lot of bullying to make him cry though

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:54, Reply)
Brian Molko cried, not my mate. Just to clarify.

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:55, Reply)
Are you the one who was at a party with someone from St Etienne as well?

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:56, Reply)
I sure am!!!!!
Wiggsy was quite the chum at one point.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:00, Reply)
Oh here's my most obscure
A guy I lived with at uni, his cousin was one of the child actors on Australian kids TV show "The Tribe" it was shown on channel 5 early weekend mornings and it was shit.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:54, Reply)
My Ex was obsessed with that show
and I mean proper mental obsessed, she used to make The Tribe scrap books and used to go to those meet the actors from the tribe things in London to get her picture taken with them.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:05, Reply)
My brother was taught by someone that was taught at Uni by J. R. R. Tolkien.

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:57, Reply)
My grandmother was taught by him at Oxford.

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:59, Reply)
My brother used to hang about with his granddaughter.
She died from smack.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:11, Reply)
I dreamt I'd written The Hobbit last night.
I was Tolkien in my sleep.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:30, Reply)
Fucking hell jeffers
I really should not be laughing
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:31, Reply)
My dad is Bruce Lee

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 13:59, Reply)

Lee Tuck
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:01, Reply)
Kris Needs once left some MASSIVE DRUGS in the DJ booth at Turnmills, which I immediately nicked.

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:01, Reply)
Worse than Barry

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:01, Reply)
Awooga

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:01, Reply)
James Dean Bradfield has told me in detail about his masturbatory habits.

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:04, Reply)
We've all heard the first album.

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:04, Reply)
LOL!

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:06, Reply)
Twenty quick tugs on Blackpool Promenade

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:20, Reply)
I bought his solo album for 2p from Asda
When I text'd my friend to tell him about this amazing bargain, he replied by saying 'It just cost you 5 times that just to tell me'
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:12, Reply)
Your friends grammar is quite poor.

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:49, Reply)
Pensions are too low.

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:51, Reply)
One of my Lecturers at Uni was Dennis Leigh
AKA John Foxx from Ultravox.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:07, Reply)
That is a good one.

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:11, Reply)
I KNO RITE!

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:11, Reply)
I once crossed a road the opposite way to Richard Wilson
In Edinburgh.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:10, Reply)
Sarah Greene tried to sell me a pool table
Unsurprisingly, it was in poor condition.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:22, Reply)
Difficult brown?

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:24, Reply)
That's no way to talk about Mike Smith

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 15:30, Reply)
Ooh, one of my lecturers at college
Was shoulder barged to the floor of a pub by Joe Strummer. I wasn't there, so I cannot confirm the verisimiltude of this tale.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:23, Reply)
I knocked Craig Bellamy flying on Northumberland Street in Newcastle once
when he expected me to move out of the way
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:43, Reply)
i saw steve harris out of iron maiden in boots in harlow once.

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:45, Reply)
Continuing your theme of musicians in shops
I saw Beck in a vintage clothes shop in Dublin and Luke Haines in Topshop in Brighton.
Edit: Oh and Bobby Gillespie in Sainsbury's, also in Brighton.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:47, Reply)
i got barged walking through brighton station
by this long thin drink of piss with a bad dye job, loads of tacky gold jewellery and a past-her-prime trophy wife (with leslie ash troutlips) on his arm. called him a prick, told him to watch where he was going.
looked familiar though.
later saw him in a local news story. nick cave.
should have bought a limo instead of that look-at-me rolex, you cowboy-booted giraffe bastard.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:23, Reply)
I know Nick Cave
He's quite a nice bloke, in fact

When I first met him, I thought to myself, "Blimey, that guy must get sick of people telling him he looks like Nick Cave." Luckily I didn't say that to him...
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 15:23, Reply)
John Craven bought me a pint of Guinness in Banbury
I win
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:25, Reply)
I once did the dying fly next to Chris Tarrent

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:29, Reply)
Im related to the Huguenots
as I found out once when i was on the phone... the guy on the call discovered my name and proceeded to say i was pretty much royalty from where he was, and the church he went to. He was extatic and saw it as a sign from god... to say i was confused was an understatment.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:26, Reply)
I bumped into Prince Harry in a toilet
Tripped over Maureen Lipman in Boots, nearly walked into Neil Morrissey in an airport and was held down by the ankles by Kris Akabusi at the tender age of 8.

AWOOGA.

All of these are absolutely true.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:33, Reply)
I helped Lesley Garrett with her luggage on a train

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:42, Reply)
The Luggage off here? The virgin?

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:44, Reply)
Yeah
He was quite heavy and pink
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:45, Reply)
you need to be more careful

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:44, Reply)
i made another thread
this makes me famous
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:48, Reply)
I once posted in a thread started by Captain Cavy off of the internet.

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:49, Reply)
you are honoured

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:51, Reply)
Woah, I once read that thread

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:52, Reply)
I didn't mean that one.

(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 14:54, Reply)
I was once interviewed by Lorraine Kelly
I saw her last night on Never Mind The Buzzcocks, being all filthy-mouthed and rude. Made me feel a bit strange.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 15:33, Reply)
Couple of mates are named in the credits of a Levellers dvd.
Also my missus snogged Mark Chadwick. I used his hat as an ashtray.
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 15:35, Reply)
I supplied the 1980s video camera used by the boys in the film "Son Of Rambow"

so I'm in the credits, too
(, Thu 2 Aug 2012, 15:50, Reply)

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