Stockport (aka: Grotport, Chavport, 12th worst town in UK according to The Idler's 50 Crap Towns)
is Manchester's runty, ginger, younger sibling, despite having both a larger surface area and a greater population. The fact that Stockport is so overlooked compared to its richer, more glamorous neighbour despite this is testament to just how unrelentingly mediocre it is in every respect.

Its huge number of suburbs range from the snooty, mock-Tudor John-Lewis-ness of Bramnhall to the run-down, bombed-out hell-hole of Brinnington (where bicycles are burnt out because there simply are no cars)

Its major landmarks include the Stockport Viaduct (2nd largest Brick structure in Britain donchaknow) and the Co-Operative Bank Pyramid; a massive glass corporate eyesore.

It's also home to the Hat Museum alongside other unattractive attractions.
( Fitznicely into a thimble, Fri 30 Oct 2009, 13:41, 10 replies)

I live in Stockport
I'd agree with 'mediocre' and yep, it's a bit dull, but you know what, after reading everyone else's mutterings about how shit their towns are, it makes me appreciate it a bit more :)

Yeah, it's a bit boring, and you wouldn't catch me going anywhere near the town centre on a Friday or Saturday night, but you can say that about 90% of UK towns.

Here's a new phrase for the town that I've just made up now:

"Stockport - you could do worse."

You ever been to the Hat Museum? I went once with a mate of mine from Wiltshire and we spent a lot of the time on the guided tour trying not to giggle for some bizarre reason :)
( Mike Fishcake teamfishcake.co.uk - better than your mum's face, Fri 30 Oct 2009, 14:03, closed)

^ This
That phrase should be added to the Welcome sign
( ERG1008 is climbing in yo windows & snatchin yo people up, Fri 30 Oct 2009, 16:56, closed)

The main thing I've noticed from my infrequent shopping trips to Stockport
is that its just like going shopping in Manchester, but with all the non-scallies removed. I've never felt threatened there, just a bit disappointed.
(The man with the flan swashed his buckle on, Fri 30 Oct 2009, 14:43, closed)

It's got Toy-R-Us
And The Nelson, and The Thatched House :0)
( SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Fri 30 Oct 2009, 14:57, closed)

Stockers
I love the place! Loads of history, some decent booze venues as noted above and er... We had a Heaven and Hell night club!
(The Boy Monders I have ginger bits in my beard., Fri 30 Oct 2009, 15:56, closed)

Night clubs
Is the Bamboo in Hazel grove still going ??
(Betty Boothroyd's Love custard Tourettes at the KOB, Tue 3 Nov 2009, 16:10, closed)

haha
i went to school in stockport. it's a dump but it's harmless.

however, all the chavettes have now migrated to wilmslow, trying to catch a rich footballing boyfriend. this really fucks me off as you can't go to the pub any more without having to beat anorexic orange bleached blonde 12 year olds out of the way!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 30 Oct 2009, 19:23, closed)

moved away from Wilmslow to the Heatons (stockport suburb)
in Feb this year: It is now nice to be able to go for a pint without someone parking their ferarri on double yellows outside the pub and having to watch the mad rush of tangerine women run towards them.

Having said that, I lived in wilmslow for 11 years and it wasnt a bad place to live at all!
( hygor gyrates with animatronic emptyness, Sat 31 Oct 2009, 9:41, closed)

It does have the Egerton Arms though, which tries to make up for a lot of it.
Also, no Stockport=No Craig Cash, and he's ace.

On the whole though I will have to agree. Stockport is shit...and I can't believe you forgot to mention Adswood. It's worse than Brinny by miles.
( Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Fri 30 Oct 2009, 23:56, closed)

oh the memories !
Born and Bred in stockport, but moved away a number of years ago to down near cambridge,but on the odd visit back "Up North" to Stockport I have to agree with all of the sentiments mentioned. When you pull off the M60 it just feels a bit grimy and dirty, and the population are a cross between a meeting point for the Jeremy Kyle show participants, and the reject contestants from and early edition of Bullseye, all waiting for their chance to win a toaster from Argos, and half a caravan. Played football over many years in all the "Luxury Suburbs " mentioned, Adswood, Brinny, Reddish, all complete sh*tholes.
On a brighter note, spent many a happy time in the Emmigration on Hall st, Offerton, Tennants Extra and loose women, those were the days !
(Betty Boothroyd's Love custard Tourettes at the KOB, Mon 2 Nov 2009, 13:14, closed)