unsuccessful shopping trip
What's your favourite form of dementia?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 10 May 2014, 13:54, 50 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

I had a ribeye steak last night at the restaurant, with a blue cheese sauce.Stunning. When did you last truly appreciate a meal, as something other than fuel?

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Sat 10 May 2014, 10:43, 37 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

Get fucked, pricks.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 10 May 2014, 9:12, 64 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

Enough of that pish.
One song. Your favourite. What is it? Why?
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 9 May 2014, 19:50, 77 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

Just filled in a tenant application form
Can't believe the shit they wanted to know. Couldn't submit it unless I told them my next of kin - including address, and email address. My next of kin doesn't HAVE an email address but, unless I put something in the box I couldn't submit it.
What the actual fuck. It's precisely 3/16 of fuck all to do with the application. I rang them. They were cocknuggets of the first water and couldn't see past their 'procedures'. Cunts, the lot of them and I hope they all die of cancer after seeing their children die in a fire.
Alt: How calm are you? Ready for the weekend?
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Fri 9 May 2014, 18:50, 37 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

Fuckin Friday Danny dyer train can thread! Gettit you slaaaaaaaags
Alt: fire or ice?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 9 May 2014, 17:25, 60 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

Eurovision is shit and anyone watching it 'for a laught because it's so bad' is a cunt.
What else this weekend makes you a cunt?
Alt: Naked Ape touches kids on the cunt.

Altalt: Get fucked.
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Fri 9 May 2014, 13:06, 87 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

Cycling Ave.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 9 May 2014, 12:28, 62 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

Christ, is that still going?
Weekend plans etc. I've got an OU tutorial in Cambridge in the morning, then home for furious packing/tidying/giving keys to people so they can feed the cats, hopefully all done before Eurovision starts, then 5-odd hours on a coach that arrives at Gatwick at the hitherto undiscovered hour of 4.30am at Gatwick, then flying to Spain and staying there for a fortnight.

Top that.

Alt: Lunch? Is it that time?

AltAlt: Cast of Baywatch (classic), kill/shag/marry
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 9 May 2014, 11:11, 90 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

Morning tv is officially shite, Matthew Wright show with some woman. I think we have Kyle later. Whatannoys you on the box?

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Fri 9 May 2014, 9:27, 198 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

Possibly my first morning thread!
Definitely not my first moaning thread.
Think my cat is gonna be a vet job tomorrow. He's been very lethargic lately, eating and grooming habits have changed and his purring is intermittent. Poor thing.

It's FRIDAY!! Weekend plans? Aside from Eurovision of course.

alt.Fave news story of the minute?
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 9 May 2014, 8:10, 116 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

What's the worst repeated expression on the Internet or B3ta in particular?
Apart from 'lime & chilli chicken', 'YM' or 'alright'?

Alt: Who do you trust completely?
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 8 May 2014, 19:34, 76 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

Antibiotics, yeah!
Damned dirty bacteria, I'll claw you out with my bare hands if I have to.

*cramps, whimpers, curls up into ball*
( Kroney, Thu 8 May 2014, 17:30, 55 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

That thread was shit. Sorry. I'm taking family and sis in law for a meal tonight. Meat suggestions please, including dessert.
Alt, that McCann thing is back in the news, seriously, what do you think happened to the kid?
(DBT became a fruitarian on, Thu 8 May 2014, 12:25, 81 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

Best web browser?
Chrome takes up too much memory.
IE is shit.
Firefox is annoying me.

Any suggestions?
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 8 May 2014, 11:41, 70 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

Fuck it, joke thread
What's Whitney Houston's favorite type of coordination?
HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAND EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEYEEEEEEEEE

Alt: Best flavour crisps?
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 8 May 2014, 10:22, 120 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

Thread with actual questions needed I feel
Dream job. Go.

Alt: Job I could actually do vis-a-vis my unique (ie very, very sparse) skill-set.

AltAlt: Perfect occupation for any other b3tan of your choice
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 8 May 2014, 9:18, 96 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

Typical McBeef with his shit thread.
List out everything else that's wrong around here. Vent.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 7 May 2014, 21:22, 227 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

What do you prefer, Tangles cunt or his glans
alt: spots or stripes
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 7 May 2014, 17:02, 44 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

My site is closing in January
There's going to be an "individual consultation period" in which the options of relocation (nearest site: Newark, the only town in Britain to be an anagram of wanker with a population to match, also a fair trot from Norwich), working from home or redundancy.

Somehow I doubt I'm top of their "keep at all costs" list.

Anyone want a blowjob? £100 a pop.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 7 May 2014, 15:47, 147 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

So what do all think about 70's prog rock bands kidnapping Nigerian schoolgirls?
Definitely not a Whiter Shade of Pale there.

Alt: Lunch, obvs. I had a sloppy pulled pork bun and a doughnut.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 7 May 2014, 13:53, 176 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

Growing old gracefully.
m.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-27305701
How do you want to age?
Alt, sister in law is preparing a vegan picnic. Facepalms all round.
(DBT became a fruitarian on, Wed 7 May 2014, 11:53, 161 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

Hair
I'm going for my first haircut of the year in a bit.
Haha how about you post some hilarious suggestions for what I could have done?

Alt: Worst hairstyle you ever had? Pics please.

Altalt: Is this really the dawning of the age of Aquarius? And where the fuck is Frank Mills?
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 7 May 2014, 11:01, 113 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

UFOs and close encounters
Ever seen a UFO? Convinced of life on other planets? Are you David Icke? Go into really graphic details about anal probes. Otherwise, just tell us of your UFO sightings: You know - how you once saw a helicopter, thought it was an alien invasion and soiled your trousers.
( Peej, Wed 7 May 2014, 10:49, 11 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

Good morning my internet chums
I would like to know of your hidden talents please. Can you play an instrument, run very fast, count cards, gotta leave the table?

NYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

My Mum has no hidden talents. They are all on view (for a fee)
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 7 May 2014, 9:03, 139 replies, latest was 10 years ago)