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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Favorite comedians?
Who are your favorite comedians gigging at he moment? Mine are Doug Stanhope, Micky Flannagan and Don Biswas.

Alt: Longest time you been awake for?
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:30, Reply)
I don't have any favourite comedians

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:33, Reply)
or colour, or anything like that

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:33, Reply)
Yeah thanks for leaving me just hanging here Stibbins

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:35, Reply)

Miles Jupp, Reg D Hunter, that weird little fucker called Andrew with a squeaky voice.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:35, Reply)
I didn't know Battered's real name was Andrew.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:41, Reply)
Stop bullying him!

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:42, Reply)
Until I achieve full shit-smearing meltdown I consider myself a failure.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:43, Reply)
Is that the only thing missing from your life?

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:45, Reply)
This is funnier if you could see me, because I was waving a screwed up fiver at the screen.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:46, Reply)
That would indeed have been funnier.
4% funnier.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:47, Reply)
David Cameron

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:36, Reply)
Politic-lol

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:42, Reply)
and i was awake for 50 hours or more once

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:36, Reply)
I don't know who's gigging at the moment.
I like Reg D Hunter currently though.
Alt: Thursday morning to Tuesday afternoon. Would genuinely rather die than do it again.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:40, Reply)

Saw Reg D hunter onceat a comedy club in Ealing, he's proper funny.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:07, Reply)
Alt: four days and nights. I don't recommend it, it's fucking expensive and you go half mad.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:42, Reply)
See above.
Never, ever again. I was hallucinating like a loon by the end. Crouching down on a smoking balcony to avoid the dragons flying overhead.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:18, Reply)
My mate Paul McCaffrey is apparently on BBC3 at 9pm on Saturday
as a guest on that cunt Russell Howard's show. He's a fantastic chap. Vote for him.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:43, Reply)
Russell Howard's a fantastic chap?

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:44, Reply)
Hahaha fuck that shit, he's a bonk-eyed flid.
I'm talking about Caffers.

I apologise for my shit English RIGHT HERE.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:45, Reply)
Thank you, Monty 'little mouse with clogs on' Boyce.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:46, Reply)
i know the mccaffreys, i was really upset to hear about Ben :'(

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:09, Reply)
Someone put toilet roll in the sink and turned the taps on, in the toilet upstairs
I'm now trying to find the culprit.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:43, Reply)
It was Battered.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:44, Reply)
He didn't reckon on my super powerful statistical analysis.
No one can escape the excel worksheet!
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:45, Reply)
If I was Battered I would be quaking in my size 4 Start-Rites now.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:46, Reply)

and nipping off to change his pampers.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:47, Reply)
That's more Gonz's department, to be fair.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:01, Reply)
he's deleted his account again

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:47, Reply)
*worriedly checks news for Little Chef marketing suicide reports*

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:48, Reply)
:'((((

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:48, Reply)
No he hasn't you little scamp.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:49, Reply)
LOL
NOT REALLY YET HE AINT
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:50, Reply)
He must have been scared at the kicking
Gonz was going to give him.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:49, Reply)
Have you got much data modelling experience?

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:47, Reply)
Yeah, mainly in forecasting.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:48, Reply)
It's raining.
That's stand up - RIGHT HERE.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:49, Reply)
*pisses pants*

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:50, Reply)
*makes note*
I'm getting increasingly involved with modelling actuarial data, which is all a bit new to me.

Consider this a warning that I might one day ask you about SAS modelling techniques.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:51, Reply)
Just camo up and hold a gun.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:52, Reply)
*Goes off to buy Michael Ryan for Dummies*

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:53, Reply)
*shoots up the shops and gets a pint of milk*

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:04, Reply)
I'm sure the complete joke was something along the lines of
What was the last thing Michael Ryan said to his mum?
I'm just shooting up the shops to get a pint of milk....

'Over my dead body' she replied.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:08, Reply)
You are correct.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:08, Reply)
It's the only form of modelling outside of Airfix he's likely to have done.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:49, Reply)
I was a child model once,
for sausages, true story.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:50, Reply)
Choirboy, were you?

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:50, Reply)
The vicar wore his arse like a pinky ring.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:51, Reply)
Altar boy, yep.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:52, Reply)
Well that joke turned tragic
I'm very sorry for your bad experiences.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:56, Reply)
I knew I'd seen your legs somewhere before.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:53, Reply)
jo koy and nick swarsdon are pretty funny

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:47, Reply)
Free the Stibbins one.
Alt: 3 months.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:47, Reply)
Afternoon Stunned.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:48, Reply)
Good day, sir.
I am just off to dinner.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:49, Reply)
Anywhere nice?

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:51, Reply)
Home House.
Never been before. I hope so.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:52, Reply)
Have fun.
Any particular occasion, or are you just going because it involves food?
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:53, Reply)
Client dinner.
I could do without it tbh. I've got things I need to do tonight.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:54, Reply)
MY MUM!!!!!

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:55, Reply)
There are simpler ways of calling Stunned
a pussy, you know.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:55, Reply)
Not before dinner, mate.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:57, Reply)
It's a free feed.
Which is no bad thing.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:55, Reply)
Alt: Chinny reck-on

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:50, Reply)
Alt: you started it.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:50, Reply)
I think you'll find that as you denied it, you must clearly have supplied it.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:54, Reply)
Mickey Flanagan
has been peddling the same act for about 6-7 years now. I saw him in a tiny club in leicester square and it was the identical "out out" act that he did on his christmas DVD.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:55, Reply)
The 'Peter Kay Method', as it were

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:58, Reply)
Same with House Ass.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:59, Reply)
I have him filed under
'seems like the kind of chap who'd be hilarious 'dahn the pab' but lacks the material and wit for a long career'
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:05, Reply)
Ross Noble for me
Alt: The longest I remember was 30 hours, that was this year.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:55, Reply)
I thought this chap would be your favourite
www.youtube.com/watch?v=OISGykO6Z7U
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:59, Reply)
Without clicking, at a guess I'll say it's either Rhod Gilbert, or Jackie Stewart?

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:00, Reply)
:-(
It was Rhod Gilbert.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:02, Reply)
Hahahahahahaa

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:06, Reply)
There are 2 other comedians you could have assigned to me for the memes, really
Eddie Izzard for the crossdressing, and Alan Carr for the fact I'm clearly a gigantic queer(!)
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:24, Reply)
I find Rhod Gilbert quite funny.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:25, Reply)
Jimmy Carr, Russell Brand, Stewart Lee, David Baddiel and Peter Kay
They are all fucking excellent and very very funny. Oh and Andy Parsons from Mock the week is not shit in any way whatsoever.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:57, Reply)
Russell Brand?
Really?
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 16:59, Reply)
Fucking hilarious
I literally have to stick plasters to my sides when watching due to the splitting caused by my laughter.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:00, Reply)
*buys Arthur*

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:02, Reply)
THIS IS SARCASM EVERYONE, DON'T WORRY, I GOT IT

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:03, Reply)
*cancels Arthur purchase*

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:06, Reply)
Hahaha

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:06, Reply)

Stewart Lee is fantastic, I bought the Fist of Fun box set as a treat for myself.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:08, Reply)
I KNOW!
He just cracks me up!
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:09, Reply)

Have you the seen the gig where he talks about going to school with Richard Hammond? it had me going for my inhaler I laughing so much.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:11, Reply)
I saw the one where he mocks the Scottish
Soooooo clever!
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:13, Reply)
for your viewing pleasure when you can
www.youtube.com/watch?v=w0i0RXMvzMs
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:15, Reply)
GOD YEAH!!!
He's up there with JASPER CARROTT!!!!!!!!!
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:12, Reply)

I listened to the Jim Jones Revue earlier, when you're right you're right man and that was good. I also listened to Alabama Shakes, they were crap.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:12, Reply)
JJR are simply tip-top live.
If you're keen, check out his first band Thee Hypnotics. They were excellent too. Esp 'Live'r Than God' mini LP.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:17, Reply)
*Reads insurance claim form, gets 30 year career*

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:13, Reply)
WOW YOU LOVE JASPER TOO!
BFF!!!!!!!111111one!
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:14, Reply)
Jasper Carrott is Tangledupinblue Posterís dad. TRUFAXXXXXX

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:19, Reply)
tangledupinblue is Lucy Davies?

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:20, Reply)
Yes.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:22, Reply)
i didn't like him in The Office

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:23, Reply)
I didn't like anyone in The Office.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:25, Reply)
I didn't like The Office.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:26, Reply)
You preferred 'Gavin and Stacey'

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:27, Reply)
*does dickhead gesture*
I remember that being hilarious when I was 10
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:31, Reply)

Stewart Lee is great, loads of comedians are copying him now.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:14, Reply)
Stewart Lee is nothing but a poor manís Carrott.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:20, Reply)

isn't that a wotsit?
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:22, Reply)
V good

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:22, Reply)
I've seen Jack Whitehall in Fulham twice.
As in once at a game and in the bookies last week. Both times I told him to stop doing comedy, he hasn't. I feel like I've let everyone down.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:20, Reply)
You are right to feel that way.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:22, Reply)

if you see Russell Kane, can you kill him?
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:22, Reply)
He is the worst 'comedian' on the 'circuit' today. I fucking hate that cunt.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:25, Reply)

same man,utter wank.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:32, Reply)
Peter Cook was better than any of the shit suggested so far

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:22, Reply)
I love you PhillieJoe.
You are so very right.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:25, Reply)
Awwww my heart's aflutter!

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 22:17, Reply)
Quite correct
And if you get hold of some of the bootlegged shows Lenny Bruce was 166% better than the whole lot put together.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:30, Reply)
He went shit after he married Dawn French, though.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:31, Reply)
Lenny Bruce getting married to Dawn French is a wonderful image to conjure with

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:35, Reply)
Bob Monkhouse
Was my favourite.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:26, Reply)

how old are you Jeff?
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:26, Reply)
Bit personal, isn't it?

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:28, Reply)

Is it? sorry.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:28, Reply)
Innit.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:28, Reply)

sorry man.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:29, Reply)
I think itís going to take a bit more than simply saying sorry, here.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:36, Reply)

Kiss my cherries gramps.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:40, Reply)
Why do you ask?

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:28, Reply)

I dunno I always pegged you as mid 30's but never sure.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:29, Reply)
He's 19.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:29, Reply)

yeah in 1n 1986
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:30, Reply)
I'm 37

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:30, Reply)
I'm 54

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:30, Reply)
I'm 17

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:30, Reply)
I'm 8

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:30, Reply)
Don't believe the badges on the cards you get

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:32, Reply)
I'm not a number

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:31, Reply)

you are a tit though.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:31, Reply)
Yes you are - you're a 'number two'

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:32, Reply)

as mid 30's but never sure

You dirty fucking bender
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:38, Reply)
Didn't we have this question the other week?
I seem to remember answering it before.

I enjoyed Mickey Flanagan's DVD, I suppose.
At the moment, I like Chris Ramsay, Daniel Sloss & Danny Bhoy. I wouldn't say they were 'great', but I like them.

Could somebody do something lolwacky to cheer me up? I'm in danger of a humour bypass tonight...
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:30, Reply)

sloss is gash
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:31, Reply)
I thought Sloss was on lead guitar in a Guns n Roses tribute band.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:33, Reply)
I thought it was a badly-spelt german castle in "where eagles dare"

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:34, Reply)
What a film, Mighters. What. A. Film.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:35, Reply)

WHen I have an essay to write in one day I set myself the task of writing the whole thing in the time it takes Stalingrad to play out in the background. I've only failed once.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:38, Reply)
Good technique.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:40, Reply)
You're gash.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:39, Reply)

no, you're gash... fucking stinks.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:40, Reply)
That makes very little sense Bob.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:41, Reply)
I'm going to punch his lights out on Saturday.
Assuming I can still make it, that is...
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:43, Reply)
Any news from the hospital?

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:44, Reply)
They look like they're going to keep him in overnight.
The procedure they wanted to do keeps getting pushed back, and they might end up doing it tomorrow morning now.

I'm actually a lot less calm than I thought I was. I may be back later tonight having a wobble.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:47, Reply)
I'm going out for a bite to eat later.
But let me know how things are going.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:47, Reply)
I seem to have missed something here
is hubby alright?
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:55, Reply)
Dicky ticker had a flid attack this morning.
He's been in chokey all day.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:56, Reply)
Oh shit!
but he's going to be alright, yes?

EDIT - although I thought chokey was slang for prison, where I assume he's not?
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:56, Reply)
Yeah, I should think so.
I'm going back in in a bit.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:58, Reply)
Bloody hell, though
are you alright?
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 18:00, Reply)

Sorry to hear that mate, hope it works out.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:57, Reply)
I'm sure it will.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:59, Reply)

Cool x
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 18:05, Reply)

It would have worked in the spoken word but I can't do that on here so did the best I could ok, you fucking critic!
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:44, Reply)
i just poured melted butter in my ears and cried tears of lard

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:31, Reply)
I wouldn't say you were 'great', but I like you.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:32, Reply)
Coming from one of the cool kids, that's very exciting.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:36, Reply)
Who do you consider the 'cool kids' to be.
(This'll be interesting).
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:37, Reply)
The ones that say they're cool.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:38, Reply)
Barry's clearly cool.
insofar as sunglasses purchase equates to cool.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:39, Reply)
First mistake right there....

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:39, Reply)
staple a budgie to a cat's tail.
Failing that, tie a bit of ham to your dog's tail.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:33, Reply)
Today is World Holocaust Day
World LOLocaust Day, I call it.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:43, Reply)
Reading that, I think *I'm* the best comedian gigging today.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:43, Reply)
I was going to say 'Monty Boyce' is my favourite.
But I went for Bob Monkhouse instead.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:44, Reply)
I imagine they *both* suffered prostate troubles...

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:45, Reply)
So we should have a holocaust to celebrate.
What nonsense is "World Holocaust Day?"
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:45, Reply)
It's where I drink 20 pints
then sneak into a Golder's Green cemetery and smear my shit everywhere.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:46, Reply)
Don't you do that every Thursday night?

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:47, Reply)
*sheepish face*
Yes.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:49, Reply)
i am still laughing at "bonk-eyed flid"
no idea why this has amused me quite so much
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:49, Reply)
As I keep saying, I'm the best comedian gigging today.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:50, Reply)
giggedy

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:51, Reply)
If you keep saying it, it'll happen.
I saw something similar happen in a film called Candyman.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:52, Reply)
i thought that was your wedding video?!

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:54, Reply)
^ Conclusive proof that Monty is the 'best comedian gigging today'

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:56, Reply)
I met him once
he's a bit squinty but he was actually very polite and pleasant.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:54, Reply)
oh now, berk
monty's lovely!
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:55, Reply)
Lovely teeth.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:56, Reply)
Did you make contact with the b3tan you was trying to contact?

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:56, Reply)
No.
it's no big deal, though.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:57, Reply)
Well it might be a big deal.
*worries*
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:58, Reply)
*worries too*

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:58, Reply)
It's alright.
Said b3tan is hard as fucking nails.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:58, Reply)
Robby Box lolz

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:59, Reply)
hahaha
Well edited.

I was confused before.

*Listens to the Bucks Fizz theme tune*
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 18:00, Reply)
Well, not on account of what I was trying to get hold of them for, anyway
It could be a big deal in that some kind of drama has gone on, but, like I say...I can't get hold of them to find out.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 18:00, Reply)
Did you try the other number I gave you?

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 18:00, Reply)
No, I wasn't sure if I should
as it might not be theirs. I'll give it a try if I don't see them at the weekend.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 18:04, Reply)
I'll try that number now and let you know.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 18:08, Reply)
A profound statement against repressive regimes everywhere
I expect that Idi Amin might have thought twice if he'd known that was to be his memorial.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:50, Reply)
Exactly.
It's a form of 'street theatre'.

Only with more poo.
(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 17:51, Reply)

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