What's the strangest thing you've ever been sold (or someone's tried to sell you)?
And did you buy it?

Alternatively: What's your craziest concert experience?
(philthemoose asbentee and/or-ed., Fri 26 Mar 2004, 3:31, Reply)

if...
b3ta closed today (blame me for that thought!) - how many suicides would we see tomorrow?...
(klingelfee, Fri 26 Mar 2004, 0:17, Reply)

Who shot Mr Burns?

(Lord Monkey of Yorkshire,OBE killed a gipsy on...., Thu 25 Mar 2004, 21:54, Reply)

who shot J.R??

(Market Man, Thu 25 Mar 2004, 15:54, Reply)

Why?
Why are so many of these questions not questions?
(Mortimer, Thu 25 Mar 2004, 10:48, Reply)

how do you play hopscotch
i've never understood that bloody game
( SiX and his hat, Wed 24 Mar 2004, 2:40, Reply)

When I was a young'un, my school
banned tennis balls in the playground, but those bloody girls were still allowed their huge whippy skipping ropes. bitches.

So, my question is: what's best; commie-left or nazi-right?
(Naughty Tortoise, Tue 23 Mar 2004, 23:44, Reply)

questions....
whats your favourite Jethro Tull album, and have you ever shot a seagull whilst listening to it and wearing a kiss me quick hat?
(Lord Monkey of Yorkshire,OBE killed a gipsy on...., Tue 23 Mar 2004, 21:14, Reply)

particularly good for radio
pearoasts that have a cracking idea/pun, and no pshop talent/effort
( The Lurker Plenty One, Tue 23 Mar 2004, 16:13, Reply)

New on B3ta: "If... Cub Scouts and Girl Guides turned to Terror."
B3ta's new documentary series (based purely on guess work) speculates on wildly unlikely predictions that scare you into staying indoors and watching TV.

This Week:

Is the nation prepared for Cub Scouts and Girl Guides turning to terror?
(microsaulxp, Tue 23 Mar 2004, 10:07, Reply)

Reality T.V.
I want to host a reality t.v. show in which I smack any celebrity I want. Justin Timberlake would be a recurring guest. What is your idea for a reality t.v. show?
(CactusZack Shaved his coin purse on, Mon 22 Mar 2004, 22:59, Reply)

It happens to all of us...
So you're sat on the bus/train/whatever and some nutter sits next to you and starts talking absolute bilge and acting *inappropriately*. What's your best nutter on the bus story?
(clapper, Mon 22 Mar 2004, 17:06, Reply)

If you had 5 minutes on stage...
and the whole world was listening, what would you sing?
( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Mon 22 Mar 2004, 16:36, Reply)

When Good Deeds go Bad
A friend was driving to work one morning when, sitting waiting at traffic lights, he saw a very large seagull, (the skinheads of the bird world), smash head first into a shop window, and fall to the ground lifeless.
Not wanting to leave the poor thing alone and dying in the street, he decided to pick it up and take it to the nearest RSPCA centre which was close by. He put the inanimate flapper on his back seat and drove off. Within minutes he was alerted by the screetching and flapping to his rear, that the bird had done a Lazarus, was absolutley fine and fighting fit, but in no mood to thank him for his concern. It began pecking at his head and face, shitting all over the place and trying to fly out through the windscreen. He did managed not to crash the car, and eventually got rid of the bastard thing without too much blood loss. Still needed an anti-tetnus jab, and much cleaning of both face, and upholstery. Must've been brilliant for the guy in the car behind him.

There must be more tales of regretfull Samaritans out there.

(sorry for the length..oooh-errr)
(Chillumm, Mon 22 Mar 2004, 14:34, Reply)

i think it should be
on best friends?, those people who claim to be your best friend but at the last minute disown you/ shoot you. or strangest moment in a public place
(Limited IQ, Mon 22 Mar 2004, 13:58, Reply)

what
is the greatest blag you have ever tried/done/got away with?
( Dave - KneHigHbOb talks, Sun 21 Mar 2004, 21:24, Reply)

Unusual wanking behaviour
I was once travelling with a band when the drummer told me about how he used to dress up his pillow in his mother's lingerie and jerk off over it... He thought that we would all have admitted to similar experiences and spent quite some time saying "Oh come on, you've all done it but you're afraid to admit it."

We hadn't, but I bet there're plenty of people with other cringe making stories to give us a laugh.
(McGeorge, Sun 21 Mar 2004, 15:24, Reply)

Bleh Blah Bloh
Most uncomfortable traveling experience...
( SlimScabies, Sat 20 Mar 2004, 13:53, Reply)

How can I get...
...a loan for £2000-£1,000,000,000,000 even if I have been previously refused credit or have arrears and CCJ's?
( renegatus: i'm what willis was talkin' 'bout, Sat 20 Mar 2004, 11:02, Reply)

question of the week
strangest people you've come across in 'times of need' (for example: need to use the washroom, or need to get to a hospital, "please, help, Mister tattood-angry-wolf-man..")
(marlin hunter, Sat 20 Mar 2004, 5:20, Reply)

Mixing two of my favourite passtimes...
Relate interesting stories of drunkeness at a sporting event.

Pitch invasions and vomit score bonus points.
(Greatest Bloke, Fri 19 Mar 2004, 20:38, Reply)

"have you ever lied to the police?"
or maybe just amusing police related stories...?
( ginmakesamanmean Few and far between, Fri 19 Mar 2004, 9:33, Reply)

my question
if any, how many, and what kind?

my answer:

four, green ones.
(Angle Grinder, Thu 18 Mar 2004, 23:44, Reply)

Daft nickname
Whats the most daft nickname you or a mate have ever had?????
I wanna find out if anyone can beat my old one.... PumBum!!
(NotSaying lurking is fun, Thu 18 Mar 2004, 13:59, Reply)

Have you ever...
masturbated and started thinking of someone you really didn't want to think about while masturbating? Like your mother or co-worker? Aaah, get of my head, get out of my head!
( kingjay umpfh, Thu 18 Mar 2004, 12:12, Reply)

Hows about
The best prank phone calls. Just for a laugh
(Mr. Roboto, Wed 17 Mar 2004, 23:09, Reply)

What should we ask for a question of the week?
As someone who works with the public I think that the question should be:

Just how stupid are the general public?
(Burt Reynolds, Wed 17 Mar 2004, 12:41, Reply)

B&Bs and odd holidays
i can rember when i when to blackpool one year to see the lights , we stayed in a b&b its was like a surrelist nightmare the beds had no sheets , the landlandy could only make Minestrone soup , and she had a tash and a glass eye it was class
(waikiki, Wed 17 Mar 2004, 12:28, Reply)

instructions and what went wrong.
instructions are shit most of the time; or sometimes you're shit cos you can't read, spazzer.

you know those heinz lunchbowl things?, instructions are:
remove plastic lid
peel away metal lid
replace plastic lid
microwave for 1 minute

i followed them implicilty, apart from the peel off metal lid one.
the microwave exploded and scalded the fridge with hot mexican chilli.
ah, i can still smell the smell. from my pants, when mum found out.
( KittyWaste lives at Sleepingplanet.com, Wed 17 Mar 2004, 11:59, Reply)

Crazy things found in the park,
grocery store, ect.
( tolin its me, Wed 17 Mar 2004, 8:46, Reply)