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eveninh

(

Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 23:13, archived)

hebbo!

(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 23:14, archived)

SSGH

(

Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 23:14, archived)

hello

(

mongychops, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 23:18, archived)

Alright hobbo

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 23:25, archived)

lol

(

djrich - Live from Houghton Regis got this thing for Clémence Poésy, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 23:25, archived)

Shall we have a pun thread?
Someone be entertaining and comeup with a mashup
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 22:55, archived)

that's a bit like asking if anyone wants a cup of tea,
and then telling someone else to go and make it.

so no. get bent.
(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 23:11, archived)

btw, does anyone want a cup of tea?

(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 23:14, archived)

Please

(

Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 23:15, archived)

It was a strategic move while I wait for my pizza to be delivered
I figured by the time it arrived there would have been an intellectual on here and would have come up with a cracking pun thread
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 23:25, archived)

Good evening.

(Good evening Good evening, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 21:54, archived)

alright alright

(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 21:56, archived)

ere look you could have this
www.b3ta.com/users/profile.php?id=23552
(

mongychops, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 22:00, archived)

i just naughty stepped for looking at that and trying to log in

(

mongychops, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 22:03, archived)

stupid coding that
s1.b3ta.com/host/creative/23553/1411852055/nawtey.jpg
(

mongychops, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 22:08, archived)

and sweet golden fanjita, how we miss you, sick cunt
www.b3ta.com/users/profile.php?id=23551
(

mongychops, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 22:12, archived)

all the greats are gone
sad times
(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 23:06, archived)

Get fucked Get fucked

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 22:29, archived)

its like the two ronnies when you post

(

mongychops, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 21:57, archived)

i wish i was in the pub right now

(

The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 22:21, archived)

hth x
www.google.co.uk/search?q=cab+numbers+to+pubs+whales
(

mongychops, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 22:24, archived)

If a certain amount of time elapses without movement on the Main Board
Do we get to invade?
(DolphinWhipperer, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 21:00, archived)

Give it a whirl see what happens

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 21:12, archived)

you made me look at /bored, and it was that stupid fucking forced meme face again, well trolled

(

mongychops, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 21:20, archived)

wot no squirrel tits?

(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 21:23, archived)

i only looked at the first bit, saw that, closed the tab

(

mongychops, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 21:27, archived)

it's a public messageboard and you've got an account
that'd be like "invading" your local library
(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 21:20, archived)

bloody liberians trying to over throw our librarians next, you mark my words

(

mongychops, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 21:26, archived)

good job the Tories have closed most of them down
always forward thinking
(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 21:37, archived)

You would love that wouldn't you

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 21:32, archived)

Anyone been watching House of Cards
Some times Spacey's character talks to camera like Garth does in Wayne's world. Makes you feel included.

When was the the last time you spoke to camera?
(DolphinWhipperer, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:09, archived)

NO PHOTOS, CUNT
I believe I may have said.
(

Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:10, archived)

I don't remember you saying that
When did you say that, was I there at the time? I might have not been there at the time. When did you say that. Was I there at the time? I might have not been there at the time?
(DolphinWhipperer, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:12, archived)

not much point speaking into a camera,
really you should try speaking into a microphone.
(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:11, archived)

Camera had a mix inside the camera.
Couldn't see
(DolphinWhipperer, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:12, archived)

don't know what that means, soz.
i only watched the proper House of Cards, the original, British one.
(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:14, archived)

Good?

(DolphinWhipperer, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:18, archived)

yeah i liked it,
i'd quite like to watch it again, actually. This is my favourite bit:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=JUWzN-OXLFo
(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:20, archived)

The original was far better than the Kevin Spacey / Netflix rehash
However they have had a decent go at it
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:21, archived)

i've still not seen the US remake of the prisoner,
i sort of want to but the trailer made it look like it was based solely on a description of the original according to someone's gran.
(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:29, archived)

I haven't seen that either
However I have seen your sig. Very nice
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:32, archived)

i wrote it myself

(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:32, archived)

LIES!!!
MODS!!!!
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:43, archived)

Did you see the US remake of Red Dwarf?

(DolphinWhipperer, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:33, archived)

i saw the beginning of it, up to the title sequence.
it was too American. It was like they just got a big jar of American Television and poured it out all over the place.

i think they actually had two attempts at that, though
(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:34, archived)

I just watched the first ten minutes
Displays a basic misunderstanding of the Rimmer/Lister dynamic turning into some kind of nerd/noble jock playoff.
(DolphinWhipperer, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:42, archived)

That has to be the worst attempt ever of a uk/us cross over

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:44, archived)

yeah i don't think the characters really translate well into US culture tbh,
they don't have the same class dynamic we have.

just watching it now. Kryten is still good in it though.
(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:45, archived)

Watching it is quite an odd experience
It's like a confused nostalgia like meeting your grandmother who's been dead for years. Terrifying but oddly reassuring.
(DolphinWhipperer, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:50, archived)

it's like dreaming of your grandmother who's been dead for years,
but she's being played by Shelley Duval for some reason.
(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:55, archived)

Yeah
That's works too
(DolphinWhipperer, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:58, archived)

camera means room

(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:11, archived)

ok when was the last time you spoke to room?

(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:12, archived)

Yeah, when was the last time YOU spoke to room?

(DolphinWhipperer, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:13, archived)

This is a normal post Yeah, when was the last time YOU spoke to a person in real life

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:20, archived)

the most normal post yet!

(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:32, archived)

Yeah', seen them a few times now, really liked them.
I think I ate American BBQ about 3 times a week whilst I was watching that.
(

G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:13, archived)

I like how everyone is clever and bitchy
And no one cares about important things apart from water charities, so far.
(DolphinWhipperer, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:15, archived)

I like that "Democracy, it's so over rated" line

(

G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:23, archived)

Newsroom was good too, not as good, but still good

(

G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:24, archived)

I'm impressed how Jeff Daniels manages such a serious dramatic role
and Dumb and Dumber.
(DolphinWhipperer, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:26, archived)

omg, didn't click before that they're the same.

(

G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 21:10, archived)

i don't know any cameras to talk to

(

mongychops, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:14, archived)

Chat roulette has lots of cameras on it
Sometimes people wave their gandoodles at them
(DolphinWhipperer, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:16, archived)

i don't have a camera tho

(

mongychops, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:16, archived)

Have you checked your phone
Phones sometime have them on them
(DolphinWhipperer, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:18, archived)

maybe I am talking to the camera all the time then

(

mongychops, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:20, archived)

There's always someone watching.

(DolphinWhipperer, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:23, archived)

good luck to them, its not overly exciting viewing i would think

(

mongychops, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:33, archived)

You haven't seen Big Brother
There are people out there who would lap it up
(DolphinWhipperer, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:45, archived)

What's for dinner?

(

brb homonecrobatrachophile, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:39, archived)

Fucking meatballs innit.
I would have ordered a takeaway but someone forget to click a mouse and I didn't get paid.
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:42, archived)

lol povvo

(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:47, archived)

Lol watch buying spastic

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:48, archived)

don't wear a watch soz

(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:50, archived)

Fuck off nonce

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:59, archived)

i can prolly find one in a drawer and put it on if it'll help you stop crying?

(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:00, archived)

You keep a noose in a drawer?
Crack on pal
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:02, archived)

Toad in the hole.
Mini ones, at that. And onion gravy.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:45, archived)

sausage and chips

(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:46, archived)

in other news,
British politics really has gone weird lately, hasn't it?
(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:48, archived)

typical scotch

(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:49, archived)

not as scotch as last night

(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:50, archived)

8 super T on a park bench?

(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:50, archived)

haggis supper from the chippy

(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:51, archived)

roast and chips tomorrow

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:52, archived)

i got a guinea fowl

(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:53, archived)

So called because they can be bought for a guinea
Like penny sweets can be bought for a penny
(DolphinWhipperer, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:07, archived)

the fucker charged me a tenner!

(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:09, archived)

He was selling you Tenner Fowls under the guise of Guinea Fowls?
That's against the trades descriptions acts that is.
(DolphinWhipperer, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:10, archived)

yeah no

(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:10, archived)

Fucking QI wannabe.

(

Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:14, archived)

QI researcher actually

(DolphinWhipperer, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:17, archived)

I miss living in Glasgow.

(

Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:04, archived)

pork

(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:47, archived)

Fuck off back to /ignore

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:48, archived)

you're not really happy here, are you? do you need a cuddle?

(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:51, archived)

Fuck off homo

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:59, archived)

crass homophobia is very attractive

(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:01, archived)

Homo means man
Just like a Latin version of the dude,
(DolphinWhipperer, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:06, archived)

yeah ... he's scared of men
and women
and children
(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:08, archived)

I was calling him a homosexual just for the record.

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:22, archived)

crass homophobia is terribly attractive
shall we fuck now?
(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 21:30, archived)

I wouldn't go near you with a fucking cattle prod

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 21:33, archived)

toast

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:48, archived)

i love a bit of toast

(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:59, archived)

Had sandwich
Had salmon and cream cheese inside it
And has cheese and onion baked walkers crisps
And had small bag of chocolate buttons
Then had cup of blackest tea
(DolphinWhipperer, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:05, archived)

Pizza and wedges.
Well povvo.
(

Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:10, archived)

I may get round to cooking another pan of red onion and chilli chutney.
Got a load of chillies need using up in the greenhouse.
(

Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:15, archived)

I should jot the recipe down somewhere.
2 1/2 pounds of red onions
Chillies (4 Apache / 1/2 Scotch Bonnet / 10 Prairie Fire / 20 Jalapeno)
1/2 red pepper
1 bulb of garlic
1 tsp cinnamon
100 g brown sugar
150 ml malt vinegar

Cook veg down with 2 tbsp of olive oil until soft and sticky, add sugar, cinnamon and vinegar and heat until reduced to a thick paste. Bottle while hot in sterilised jars. Leave for two weeks (or more) to develop.
(

Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:21, archived)

would you need to sterilize the jars, I'd of thought the sugar and acid would deal with any bacteria ?

(

mongychops, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:24, archived)

I wondered, but it's a two-minute job while the chutney is welding itself to the pan so I might as well.
However, if you use sodium peroxycarbonate, the cheap shitty chrome-plate lids of the Ikea 200 ml jars catalyse decomposition of the sterilising agent, so only dip those.
(

Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:27, archived)

Spring Onion, Aspagous, baby potatoes and salmon - with a bit of jar-hollendaze sauce.
Well nice.
(

G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:14, archived)

Haha so gaycunt is Dr shambolic
And mongyspaz and the dovestain.

Can someone explain to me why the cretins of b3ta complain about the site dying when in reality it's because they get so very very upset on the Internet that their autism levels increase and they have to put 50% of the members on ignore?

The complete and utter spastics
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:23, archived)

Christ, will you just shut the fuck about qotw, no-one cares

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:26, archived)

it's important stuff

(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:30, archived)

Fill me in on the goss, looks like bare hass has kicked on the last week or soo
What's up with all the personal deets on QOTW, I got most of 'em lot on FB, they're safe 'nuff to me.
(

G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:26, archived)

What's going on gonzo?

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:33, archived)

Not much, doing an alternative economy.... I get all the free food and drink I want at a local cafe, and they get a kick ass website.
TAX THAT ONE GORDON CLOWN.
(

G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:37, archived)

SO THE CATERING COSTS FUCK ALL??
Champion. Free food for life
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:39, archived)

zackly, they're proper good 'n all, all kinds of posh stuff.

(

G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:39, archived)

Posh stuff? In a caf?
Please elaborate or I will start to think this is all lies to make you look good on an Internet site that takes catering very VERY seriously
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:41, archived)

They do their own salt-beef, have a girl come in every day to deliver home made cupcakes (like snickers, toffee crisps, orio).
Had a lovely meatball sandwich for lunch, I never finish meals in resturants - always take a doggy bag - but I finished this one off.
(

G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:45, archived)

That sounds like too nosh right there
Send me a doggy bag
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:47, archived)

Might spoil.
You been watching Ramsey do his thing in the Costa on the telly? I swear man, felt well rank seeing some of their stuff.
(

G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:58, archived)

I have seen bits.
In fact I saw it only on that gogglebox programme that in an odd way I find quite enjoyable
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:06, archived)

I ain't see that yet, but there is an advert with it on with some teenager who I want to punch in the neck with a baseball bat.
He goes something like "...merrrr merrrr, no sex before maridge, no kids out of wedlock, GOD, dad, you're like a THOUSAND YEARS OLD".
(

G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:12, archived)

He really is one annoying prick.
That whole family are fucking fat messes
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:30, archived)

I swear I was never that bad

(

G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:12, archived)

I am not sure I beleive this to be true

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:22, archived)

^upset^

(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:28, archived)

I am very very upset.
The whole thing is very upsetting.

I do believe though that those that have had to take the precaution of putting someone on ignore are most certainly more upset than I am.
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:30, archived)

if it really upsets you so much
that someone you don't know on an internet like this gets upset and puts you on ignore then i really don't know how to console you.
(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:38, archived)

I am not upset really...
I am no basil fawlty with a broken down vehicle.

I just like posting these things because those pricks operate numerous puppet accounts and will undoubtedly see how very upset I am and then can all get together and rub one off over pictures of each other's mothers
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:41, archived)

it's ok to be upset you know,
you don't have to pretend to be brave, don't bottle it up just let it all out.
(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:42, archived)

I am worried that if I open up too much I won't be able to stop
I am more upset about the fact every other cunt I work with was paid on Friday. And I wasnt
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:45, archived)

^upset^

(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:49, archived)

Fucking damn right

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:06, archived)

It wasn't a 45p note they paid you last week, you know.

(

Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:59, archived)

It happens from time to time.
Either that or I will be collecting that 45p you speak of on Monday. What utter cunts
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:07, archived)

What?

(

Frisbee OG wanker, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:28, archived)

yay for frisbee!

(

brb homonecrobatrachophile, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:16, archived)

alright frisb

(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:30, archived)

Christ man, be your age.

(

Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:29, archived)

do you see this thread as maybe a tad childish?
Do you want to see my balls nestled cosily in your eye sockets?
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:35, archived)

post pics pls

(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:36, archived)

HAWT

(

Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:37, archived)

m.flickr.com/#/photos/cayusa/438289608/
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:43, archived)

Oh god, that almost looks like... like.... HIM.

(

Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:55, archived)

DVD?
Fairholme?
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:08, archived)

Fair... Fa... Fa... I can't even say it.

(

Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:11, archived)

you can't say fairer than that

(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:30, archived)

Fuck me.
And I have never even seen a picture of the twat
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:30, archived)

If they're that close, you'd not really get to see anything.

(

Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:37, archived)

You would be too busy chocking

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:47, archived)

Are you balls likely to make their own way down the taxi strip unless chocked?
Poor ownership right there.
(

Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:55, archived)

Fucking gaylord iPhone prick

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:08, archived)

I think I might just have to buy an iPhone now.

(

Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:12, archived)

I got the 6 yesterday.
Almost instantly regretted it
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:31, archived)

"Fucking gaylord iPhone prick"

(

Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:05, archived)

no gaycunt is momo
Frank's parrot
(

$$ ✅, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:34, archived)

Alright Scouse how's it going?
Blue or red?
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:35, archived)

red

(

$$ ✅, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:38, archived)

Jagielka is a prick

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:45, archived)

This might have been mentioned before, but
Ignore is fundamentally broken, and thus open to abuse, where a user can impair their victim's experience of the site by putting them on Ignore.
No doubt, that's what they've done to you, and now you're upset.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:43, archived)

it's the only possible use for it
amazing that it still works
(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:53, archived)

Maybe it's what the devs wanted, all along,
and they've been trolling the entire site, the whole time?
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 20:42, archived)

alright?

(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 15:52, archived)

You know what, I think I might just be.

(

G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 15:58, archived)

How's the norf lahndahn massive?
Weather's quite nice up here today. I've done the lawns and stripped a load of the old shit from the borders.
(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 16:00, archived)

Which one are you again?

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 16:15, archived)

I'm one of the ones you got terribly upset about when i put you on ignore
like what I just have done ... I'm terribly drôle
(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 17:17, archived)

It's aigh't really.
Lovely day, sun was shining, made a few notes, just about to put some scran on.....nothing to complain about ere.

You good?
(

G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:23, archived)

yerr ... prolly going to avoid qftw for a bit as they've started grassing to the mods

(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:43, archived)

Fill me in tho', what the gist?

(

G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:47, archived)

I was being a dick.
Turns out they can ban you for that sort of shizzle. Twice.
(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:54, archived)

C'mon, jazz it up a bit.... I wanna know what trolling is; I want you to show me.

(

G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:09, archived)

i made people cry while riding a motorbike backwards through a flaming hoop steering with my cock

(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:16, archived)

PHWOAR

(

Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Sat 27 Sep 2014, 19:21, archived)

alright gaycunt

(

mongychops, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 16:01, archived)

alright mongy

(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 16:03, archived)

yes, thanks

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 16:14, archived)

sweet as owt

(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 16:49, archived)

Fuck off you nosey cunt

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 16:15, archived)

Who are you?
Or is the name all I need to know?
(DolphinWhipperer, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 16:29, archived)

Mongy/ shambles / doveston
Any of the above, or as they are all semi autistic it could all be the same person
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 16:36, archived)

There is certainly a marked similarity in their approaches..
Perhaps with the exception of Doveston who might well be his own person,
(DolphinWhipperer, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 16:44, archived)

That's what it wants you to think

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 16:50, archived)

You're awfully chipper now Shambles has been banished.

(

Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Sat 27 Sep 2014, 16:53, archived)

he's like Georgie Porgie or sutin

(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 16:58, archived)

There used to be a chain of fast-food pie shops Called Georgie Pie after that.
MacDonalds bought them out so you now get a steak pie meal with chips and coke.
Sure, the above has absolutely no bearing on anything, but I liked the idea of a drive-through pie shop.
(

Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Sat 27 Sep 2014, 17:03, archived)

bit nosey mate

(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 16:49, archived)

....don't answer then
(DolphinWhipperer, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 16:54, archived)

ok

(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 16:56, archived)

where do you mine these old accounts from

(

mongychops, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 17:27, archived)

Dictionary attack on dead accounts?

(

Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Sat 27 Sep 2014, 17:43, archived)

there's shitloads that people registered and then never used
presumably because they realised that this place is a load of old wank
(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 17:54, archived)

or they died

(

mongychops, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:02, archived)

hopefully

(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:04, archived)

eww youre using dead people's threads

(

mongychops, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:14, archived)

ain't even washed them

(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:43, archived)

hiya

(

$$ ✅, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 16:50, archived)

such a flirt

(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 16:51, archived)

check em

(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 16:52, archived)

dubs

(

$$ ✅, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 16:58, archived)

quads is where it's at
I don't want no dubs
Dubs is a post that can't get no love from me
(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 17:01, archived)

Yes
Are you
(herman:D, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 16:50, archived)

yeah ta

(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 16:52, archived)

I'm not criticising you but that doesn't mean I'm OK with you

(

2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 17:08, archived)

Homophone.

(

Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Sat 27 Sep 2014, 17:09, archived)

no probs
if I ever have a cold and need an inappropriate prescription for antibiotics, I'll give you a bell
(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 17:15, archived)

hebbo

(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 17:28, archived)

albight

(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 17:54, archived)

no!
I was until you arrived
(

Firkinfedup last shat on your wife's tits at, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 17:44, archived)

soz

(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 17:55, archived)

Alright gaycunt
I'm glad you're here. I've been meaning to tell you for ages now that I think you're the best one here.
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 17:56, archived)

it's true

(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:04, archived)

I would be if I wasn't spending the weekend on job applications.
It'd be alright if they weren't all 20-page documents.
(

Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:07, archived)

I don't think I've ever filled in a job application, not sure I'd be very good at it

(

mongychops, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:16, archived)

It's a highly ritualised form of admin bullshit in this field.
Basically it scrubs out those who can't lecture, can't think of new research and can't take unlimited admin bollocks dog work, but it's fucking tedious.
(

Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Sat 27 Sep 2014, 18:29, archived)

Does anyone live right next to a corner shop?
Like within 109 yards or so?

I do and they are great people they just gave me free beer.

discuss your relationship with people that own shops near you
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 14:46, archived)

i only have appropriate relationships with them

(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 14:51, archived)

Well that makes you a very very
a VERY fucking dull person. Fuck off dullard
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 15:17, archived)

leave mgt alone

(

brb homonecrobatrachophile, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 16:57, archived)

Why are you two fucking or summat?

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 17:43, archived)

No I live in a nice house.

(

2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 15:22, archived)

n L
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 15:52, archived)

Lo?

(

2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 17:07, archived)

You know you fucking know

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 17:43, archived)

Our relationship is one of exchange and barter.

(DolphinWhipperer, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 15:47, archived)

You live in mid world

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 15:51, archived)

Liverpool 2 Everton 1
Balotelli first goal scorer! Get on me lads get fucking on me innit laaaa....
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 13:09, archived)

Everton 5 Liverpool nil
Balotelli to be subbed off for a small dog in the 95th minute.
(

mr horrible up yours, dickface, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 13:46, archived)

I googled the address in your sig as it sounded familiar
I got some address in Norwich. I guess bananaman is real.
You'll be b& soon... :(
(

$$ ✅, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 13:56, archived)

You want them to get on and fuck you?

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 13:55, archived)

bit fruity

(

vladimir, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 14:02, archived)

He must be talking about the under-12 team.

(

Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Sat 27 Sep 2014, 14:16, archived)

NONCE NONCE NONCE I AM A NONCE
I really am
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 14:16, archived)

Get on me and fuck me lads fucking fruity fucking fuck face

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 14:16, archived)

That's pretty much what I imagine professional football to be like.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 14:23, archived)

Nah there would deffo be more fucking

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 14:44, archived)

Sausage and Egg McMuffin....
GET IN!!!!
(

arsefez is back, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 8:40, archived)

pikey shit only fit for scousers and retards

(sock puppet 94980 your personal details here, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 9:05, archived)

mornin'

(

arsefez is back, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 9:08, archived)

alright
gonna mow the lawns and trim the hedges like some sort of middle aged weekend cunt
(sock puppet 94980 your personal details here, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 9:48, archived)

I've already dropped my daughter off orchestra practice, like some kind of middle class bellend

(

mongychops, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 9:53, archived)

Depends.
Was it in one of those enormous fucking SUV-type nonsenses where they're so high up you can't even see the kids you're running over?
If you qualify, you might be entitled to compensation.
(

Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Sat 27 Sep 2014, 9:55, archived)

nah I used my van, I prefer it to my car now

(

mongychops, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 9:56, archived)

Mine are at French school.
We're as bad as one another. I might buy a volvo and a labrador fucking retriever.
(sock puppet 94980 your personal details here, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 9:59, archived)

School on a Saturday?
I'll bet they love you.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 10:30, archived)

The youngest thinks I'm a "fucking idiot" ... dunno where she learned that but she says it with a distinctly northern accent.

(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 16:06, archived)

^banned for mentioning dogs

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 12:23, archived)

And yet the mods get away with far worse.
Ah well, another round to begin on Tuesday, no doubt. I hear they'll both be hiding behind seven proxies.
(

Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Sat 27 Sep 2014, 12:58, archived)

yerr ... should deffo wait for Tuesday or sutin

(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 16:09, archived)

gonna stick to cats and donkeys from now on
for a bit
(gaycunt is a gay cunt, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 16:05, archived)

I hope you find a McMuffin wrapper stuffed in your hedge.

(

Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Sat 27 Sep 2014, 9:53, archived)

Don't think there's a mcscrubber within a mile of here.
There's a proper burger van by the pub round the corner.
(sock puppet 94980 your personal details here, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 9:58, archived)

... the bin.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 10:29, archived)

up yours

(

mr horrible up yours, dickface, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 12:05, archived)

I hardly go into McD's chains, but when I do their staff always have a look of hatred
I don't blame them.
(

$$ ✅, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 12:23, archived)

Jew lover

(

Michael Ellis contributes nothing, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 12:48, archived)

Aaaarrrrrggggghhhhhhheeeeeeeooooooooooooorrrrrggggggghhjhhhhaaaaaarrrrrrr

(DolphinWhipperer, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 21:21, archived)

You can say that again.
I'm not admitting to watching Strictly..., but I think Claudia Winkleman might be on heroin.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 21:24, archived)

lol "winkle"

(

djrich - Live from Houghton Regis got this thing for Clémence Poésy, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 21:25, archived)

you still would though

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 21:26, archived)

Not often I'd say "no, I wouldn't,"
but I'll make an exception, this time.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 21:57, archived)

I wish I was on heroin
I hear it's supposed to be a good larf.
(DolphinWhipperer, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 21:28, archived)

typical jew her

(

mongychops, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 21:32, archived)

^misinformed

(DolphinWhipperer, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 21:34, archived)

she used to go raving back in the late 80's early ninties. acted like a jew

(

mongychops, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 21:38, archived)

Was she raving in a synagogue?

(DolphinWhipperer, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 21:39, archived)

yeah why not

(

mongychops, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 21:47, archived)

yeah

(

djrich - Live from Houghton Regis got this thing for Clémence Poésy, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 21:24, archived)

Where's the Newsletter?

(

spazzcaptain Misses Valin @, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 21:27, archived)

Here is the Newsletter
B3ta Newsletter...

Stuff made by people we like
Stuff made by people we know
Videos
Links
Funny name Corner
Image Challenge Results
What Happened next
With thanks
Top Tip

Content is on site
(DolphinWhipperer, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 21:30, archived)

Best EVER

(

spazzcaptain Misses Valin @, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 22:44, archived)

we have top men working on it right now

(

2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 21:36, archived)

~~men~~ cat
(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 21:38, archived)

typical officer drimble

(

mongychops, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 21:49, archived)

you have to download the app
it's £1 per issue
(

$$ ✅, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 22:12, archived)

Mary Berry is not Skeletor

(

the RAND corporation a.k.a. Kevin Saxe-Coburg-Gotha, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 21:42, archived)

She's a national treasure.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 21:59, archived)

Haha
Haha
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 21:58, archived)

Haha
H'
(DolphinWhipperer, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 22:00, archived)

abbreviated laughing?
L' why not just fuck all letters? ' ' ' ' ' ' so yeah
(

Firkinfedup last shat on your wife's tits at, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 22:53, archived)

''''''''''''''''''''?

(DolphinWhipperer, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 23:23, archived)

pointing at hens' bums

(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 22:02, archived)

Superb Bumholes

(DolphinWhipperer, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 22:06, archived)

Is that fucking Thykarann or Xaczik or some shit? I only speak Shyriiwook, soz.

(

brb homonecrobatrachophile, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 23:24, archived)

The 'j' is silent.

(DolphinWhipperer, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 23:31, archived)

So what's the etiquette with sock puppets?
Also what's haooened to gloves?
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 19:41, archived)

haooe

(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 19:43, archived)

Twice

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 19:45, archived)

oaedophile oonce

(sock puppet 94980 your personal details here, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 19:44, archived)

And I always thought the best ever DJ Dr Fox was dead

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 19:45, archived)

Is one of the aliens in Skagra's time-travelling mental meltdown?

(

Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Fri 26 Sep 2014, 20:08, archived)

Surely oaedoohile oonce you spastic
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Sat 27 Sep 2014, 13:38, archived)

Massive drugs

(

arsefez is back, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 19:57, archived)

To not let the audience see your arm entering the puppet.
Otherwise you lose the suspension of disbelief vital to the audience ascribing a character to the puppet.
HTH
(

Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Fri 26 Sep 2014, 20:07, archived)

unless it's a cow puppet,
and you're playing a vet.
(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 20:10, archived)

This idea is good.

(

brb homonecrobatrachophile, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 20:14, archived)

I know.
I'm extremely clever.
(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 20:18, archived)

As the inventor of the Egg Unit
you must be.
(

djrich - Live from Houghton Regis got this thing for Clémence Poésy, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 20:25, archived)

yeah i still don't know why that didn't catch on

(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 20:26, archived)

Not enough egg cups to go round I suspect.

(

djrich - Live from Houghton Regis got this thing for Clémence Poésy, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 20:30, archived)

surely egg cups are already round,
i never saw a square egg.

long egg, yes, square, no. good idea, though. would go with square sausage.
(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 20:46, archived)

If eggs were square
imagine what a hen's bum would look like.
(

djrich - Live from Houghton Regis got this thing for Clémence Poésy, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 20:50, archived)

i'll be honest i don't actually know what a hen's bum looks like anyway

(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 20:51, archived)

There used to be a usenet group devoted to it

apparently

(

djrich - Live from Houghton Regis got this thing for Clémence Poésy, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 20:54, archived)

God's sake, don't suggest a new sport for the mods.

(

Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Fri 26 Sep 2014, 21:04, archived)

Well played there.

(

Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Fri 26 Sep 2014, 21:05, archived)

sockpuppet 94980 has sex with children

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 17:58, archived)

fuck off dozers

(

mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 18:16, archived)

mr horrible

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 18:22, archived)

All these dodgy accounts confuse me

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 18:27, archived)

spanishfly is a child-fucking racist

(spanishfly 2, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 18:37, archived)

SpanishFly once put his cock in his dog's mouth for a dare

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 18:38, archived)

SpanishFly once snorted a line of talcum powder off a baby's bottom

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 18:43, archived)

SpanishFly...
once laughed at a sad looking cat, which made the cat feel bad about himself until tea time that day.
(

arsefez is back, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 18:45, archived)

SpanishFly goes along to BNP rallies 'ironically' but secretly enjoys it

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 18:49, archived)

is the BNP still a thing?
i thought everyone went over to UKIP now and they'd all packed up.
(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 19:42, archived)

Dunno, my social media is all 'Look, a photo of a really thin dog, join Britain First and by unspecified means we'll totally put a stop to all this sort of thing'

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 19:49, archived)

In terms of membership numbers, the SNP is now the UK's third biggest party.
Imagine that.

More people signed up in the last week than UKIP have in total.
(

Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 20:15, archived)

dozers has sloppy seconds

(

2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 18:19, archived)

my favourite.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 18:20, archived)

Stealing my fucking limelight? I think not.
I am in the juicer...they have Amstel.
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 18:25, archived)

shit beer for shit cunts

(sock puppet 94980 your personal details here, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 19:05, archived)

Alright mongy

(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 19:37, archived)

Simon's sitcom flopped,
so he's working behind the bar?
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 19:08, archived)

Fuck you for reminding me of that shitcom.

(

brb homonecrobatrachophile, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 19:22, archived)

spanishfly likes a jewish queer in his mouth

(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 19:30, archived)

Now now
He doesn't have to be queer. Or Jewish
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 19:37, archived)

Fucking hell. Are you in the bar at Buckingham Palace?

(Baggenfrock get fucked, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 19:29, archived)

Christopher Robin went there with Alice...
then roofied her pinot
(

arsefez is back, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 19:31, archived)

You are about as shit as me.
Please try harder
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 19:38, archived)

Get fucked you tragic mess

(Baggenfrock get fucked, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 19:42, archived)

Now now baggedaguyinafrock
Can we not be civil about this
(

spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 19:45, archived)

'civil'?
Sounds a bit gay to me.
(Baggenfrock get fucked, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 19:52, archived)

It's a close call in the desperate attention seeking crybaby stakes, to be fair.

(sock puppet 94980 your personal details here, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 19:45, archived)

You can get fucked as well.
I've had it up to here with you cunts today.
(Baggenfrock get fucked, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 19:54, archived)

i47.tinypic.com/29ysjgy.jpg
(

drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 19:56, archived)

You're upset with us every day, treacle.
I assumed that was why you kept coming back.
(sock puppet 94980 your personal details here, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 19:56, archived)

CALL THE COPS

(

brb homonecrobatrachophile, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 18:43, archived)

called 'em..
apparently kiddie fiddling is ok round here... just don't put addresses in your sig or they'll go all night stick upside your head
(

arsefez is back, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 19:01, archived)

ok

(

mongychops, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 18:53, archived)

alright mongy

(sock puppet 94980 your personal details here, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 19:06, archived)

'Show me on this sock puppet where the sock puppet touched you'

(

Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Fri 26 Sep 2014, 19:06, archived)

Are newsletters no longer a thing?
I kinda miss them.
(

I smash things in my sleep uruk-hai ...and I'll look low. Now where'd they go?, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 16:36, archived)

hahahahahaha

yeah
(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 16:36, archived)

You do not prefer Havant to portsmouth
It's not possible.
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 16:41, archived)

It's true.
I mean I'm aware it's like saying you prefer shoving nails up your bum to wanking with razorwire, but it still applies.
(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 16:43, archived)

But there's nothing there. At least portsmouth has some actual shops

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 16:44, archived)

When was the last time you were in Havant?
This might explain why you're so drastically wrong
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 16:44, archived)

10 years ago.
maybe.
(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 16:45, archived)

Ah
There's nothing there. It has an Argos, a wilco and a pound land. Oh and a greggs.
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 16:46, archived)

Anyway, I'm going
Bye x
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 16:46, archived)

cunt

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 16:47, archived)

I'd say it's the things that havant lacks that pompey has that makes it a better place.

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 16:45, archived)

the things they havant got
AJAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAJAJAJA

so drôle
(sock puppet 94980 your personal details here, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 17:25, archived)

I Havant A Clue

(

$$ ✅, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 17:27, archived)

We'd need to donate a few grand, each,
to rouse the dog-botherers that own this site.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 16:46, archived)

too many people were shoving up there arses, it became a health hazard

(

mongychops, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 16:47, archived)

I don't know where Havant is.
Sounds like a fake place from Star Wars or sumink.
(

brb homonecrobatrachophile, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 16:59, archived)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Havant

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 17:02, archived)

You could have written that page yourself.
I still can't be sure it's a real place.
(

brb homonecrobatrachophile, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 17:46, archived)

if you told me you'd lived there your whole life, i'd believe you
it's that kind of place
(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 17:19, archived)

So it's an exciting, dynamic place with a thriving underground music scene, yeah?

(

brb homonecrobatrachophile, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 17:47, archived)

the exact opposite of that, yes

(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 17:49, archived)

you have to download the app
it's £1 per issue now
(

$$ ✅, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 17:14, archived)

here:
newsletter
(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 17:18, archived)

Let's talk about farts baby

(

brb homonecrobatrachophile, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:09, archived)

...mine smell of over ripe fruit today.

(

brb homonecrobatrachophile, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:10, archived)

were you drinking cider last night?

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:30, archived)

No, I'm 34.

(

brb homonecrobatrachophile, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:55, archived)

ha, old

(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:57, archived)

At least I don't have to drink cider any more.

(

brb homonecrobatrachophile, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:57, archived)

i'm 39, i drink cider
not the cheap plonky stuff, though. i just don't like lager.
(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:58, archived)

Haha manchild

(

brb homonecrobatrachophile, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 16:00, archived)

i'm neither a man nor a child

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 16:02, archived)

mind=blown

(

brb homonecrobatrachophile, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 16:04, archived)

wait, in that case I think it's probably okay to like cider, if you're a girl.
I'll have to check the rules.
(

brb homonecrobatrachophile, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 16:05, archived)

i'm pretty sure it's mandatory
like having a sneaky soft spot for babycham
(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 16:12, archived)

I'm trying to sing these two lines to Salt n Pepa's melody
and it just isn't working
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:33, archived)

it's like he doesn't even care

(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:52, archived)

And yet the mods do nothing

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:54, archived)

I was busy, shu'up.

(

brb homonecrobatrachophile, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:56, archived)

you get what you pay for

(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 16:02, archived)

I DONATED
an undisclosed amount of money....ahem
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 16:43, archived)

mine smell like a chemical explosion

(

Major Turd for tonight only, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:58, archived)

*nods*
There are lots of different smelling chemical explosions though. Bit vague. 2/5
(

brb homonecrobatrachophile, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 16:02, archived)

Haha
Haha
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:10, archived)

fuckingLOLOLOLOLhaHAAAA!!11111

(

brb homonecrobatrachophile, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:13, archived)

Disgusting

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:36, archived)

Whatever happened to Frisbee?

(

brb homonecrobatrachophile, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:59, archived)

He went mad so I shot him

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 16:44, archived)

haha

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:18, archived)

Haha yeah

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:36, archived)

I sometimes think about how great I could be, then remember that I had some food in the microwave
Just thinking of a duck, right now.
(

GrandmaOfShoes, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:18, archived)

we had duck the other day
I almost burned the cassoulet that I made from the leftovers last night

I'd never have been able to look my mother-in-law in the eye
(sock puppet 94980 your personal details here, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:26, archived)

just look her in the back of the head like the rest of us

(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:37, archived)

Savage

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:38, archived)

randy?

(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:51, archived)

Shagadelic baby!
Haha, classic
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:53, archived)

ooOOOohH yeehhhYAYRE

(

brb homonecrobatrachophile, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 16:03, archived)

boooooom!
fatality!
(sock puppet 94980 your personal details here, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:41, archived)

dunno ... seems a bit puerile ... I'm an adult and my digestion is quite healthy
can we talk about scalextric instead?

neeeeeeeeeeeoooooooooowwwwwwwooooooom!
(sock puppet 94980 your personal details here, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:22, archived)

there's two big micro scalextric sets in a local charity shop.
they've been there for ages.
£20 each
wasn't sure if they were really worth it
(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:28, archived)

Ones rally ones F1, or something

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:29, archived)

the mini ones are a bit rubbish
we had done in the office for a bit

get your wallet out and spend a couple of hundred on a proper set
(sock puppet 94980 your personal details here, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:32, archived)

Nah, it was just because they were there that I considered it.

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:33, archived)

"big micro" rubs me the wrong way.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:51, archived)

Oh, you know him too?
I met him in jail. You?
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:52, archived)

No, you've never met me in jail.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 16:21, archived)

Invented in Havant
One of the very few things to actually happen there
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:36, archived)

I went busking there once.
made about £2.40 enough to pay for my parking ticket
(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:36, archived)

Nice
That's the average hourly wage of people working there, so you did alright
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:38, archived)

I probably only spent about 30minutes there too

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:39, archived)

Christ
That's like four hours in the real world
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:41, archived)

I enjoy it more than portsmouth

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:42, archived)

U fucking cunt

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:44, archived)

yes I can.

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:44, archived)

No one prefers Havant to ANYTHING
I prefer diverticulitis to Havant
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:48, archived)

I prefer Havant to Portsmouth.

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 16:03, archived)

yeah, but you have a track record of ridiculous opinions

(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 16:10, archived)

citation required

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 16:19, archived)

nah

(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 16:32, archived)

cool

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 16:34, archived)

Made in the factory in Margate
where Hornby built all those little electric trains
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:37, archived)

It's facts like these that keep this board going

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:38, archived)

BORED more like!
LOL
(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:39, archived)

Haha yes

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:41, archived)

yawn

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:42, archived)

Sorry, are we boring you?
Erm...haha....erm...ha.....ERM.
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:44, archived)

haha

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:45, archived)

the Hornby/Scalextric website is excellent if you want to spend all your dinner money on toys

(sock puppet 94980 your personal details here, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:43, archived)

they're great when you've got gut ache

(

Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:30, archived)

Someone dropped their guts in a meeting once and I had to leave
it smelt like burning electric
(

$$ ✅, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:36, archived)

what
like ozone?
(

brb homonecrobatrachophile, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 16:08, archived)

I've been doing some big horrid farts today

(

Major Turd for tonight only, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:49, archived)

Put them in jam jars

(DolphinWhipperer, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 16:05, archived)

haha farts

(

brb homonecrobatrachophile, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 16:07, archived)

EVENING!
I... I'm so sorry. This... this... this has never happened to me, before.
Oh. Oh, the shame.
You won't tell anyone, will you? Maybe... maybe we could try again, another time?
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 13:54, archived)

i guess i'll just abort my thread

(

The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 13:56, archived)

It's not like this one'll be a massive improvement.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:02, archived)

YEAH HAHAHAHAHA AMAZING

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:03, archived)

Why must you keep picking on me, MONO!?

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:07, archived)

I think he fancies u

(

mongychops, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:13, archived)

jealous?

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:56, archived)

nah I'm not that sort of person

(

mongychops, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:08, archived)

cool

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:08, archived)

He's possessed by the spirit of Shambolic.

(DolphinWhipperer, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:14, archived)

hes wel meen

(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:27, archived)

yeh wel shtup r I shnk u blud

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:55, archived)

Haha
Haha
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:04, archived)

haha

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:05, archived)

Ha

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:06, archived)

ha

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:10, archived)

Pfft

(DolphinWhipperer, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:16, archived)

christ, are you serious?

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:54, archived)

Disgusting

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:03, archived)

aight

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:08, archived)

that's why they call it an xbox 360!

(

$$ ✅, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:04, archived)

who wants to come on a cycling trip around Europe
visiting the continents best examples of escalators
(

GrandmaOfShoes, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:21, archived)

if it had been paternosters, then maybe i'd have been interested

(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:23, archived)

SHOVE IT POSH BASTID

(

GrandmaOfShoes, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:29, archived)

paternosters are the tits
i think they're illegal now but there used to be an ace one in the art building at my university
(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:37, archived)

I bet they're a great way to maim people.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:42, archived)

yeah, i reckon you could chop someone fully in half
imagine that
(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:48, archived)

i cycled around the uk once
i did not visit any escalators
(

The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:28, archived)

why did you even bother then?

(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:49, archived)

seems like this would be the perfect thing for you to visit
www.supercompressor.com/gear/norway-has-invented-the-trampe-cyclocable-bike-escalator
(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:29, archived)

what's wrong with good old British escalators, eh?

(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:30, archived)

They've replaced all the wooden ones in London
^{FUCK YOU ESCALATOR BIG WIGS}
(

GrandmaOfShoes, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:31, archived)

haha it's because haha they wooden work properly hahaha

(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:34, archived)

(wooden sounds a bit like wouldn't, go on, try it)

(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:34, archived)

OAK, THAT WASN'T FUNNY, BUT I BET IT MAKES IT ONTO THE POPLAR PAGE
HA HA _HA _HA
(

GrandmaOfShoes, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:35, archived)

fir sure

(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:37, archived)

haha I'm in mahogany with all these jokes.

(

GrandmaOfShoes, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:39, archived)

IT WAS ACORNY JOKE

(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:38, archived)

that old chestnut eh?

(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:40, archived)

I think the root of the problem is that it's very easy to branch out into more puns until someone barks at you to stop

(

GrandmaOfShoes, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:40, archived)

only a matter of time with manolith at the elm

(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:41, archived)

I don't want to be left in the larch on the naughty step
just for making a few easy jokes, maybe we should ash him if it's ok to make so many puns or if we should stop, I think he's just for evergreen with envy
(

GrandmaOfShoes, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:44, archived)

try some orchard material
see if that bears any fruit
(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:49, archived)

the worst std has to be pregnancy, am i right, fellas?
bitches be crazy
(

The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 13:42, archived)

Haha
Haha
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 13:43, archived)

Leave it a few months, and it sort of clears up by itself.
Bit of a messy discharge to contend with, mind.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 13:45, archived)

I don't know, let me ask your mum
...
she said "yes".
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 13:47, archived)

i don't think you really spoke to my mum

(

The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 13:55, archived)

she certainly couldn't have replied so promptly with all of our cocks in her mouth

(sock puppet 94980 your personal details here, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:02, archived)

why do people on the internet say such hurtful things :'(

(

The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:08, archived)

that's why i always pull out at the last minute and release myself into an empty nescafe jar

(

$$ ✅, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 13:47, archived)

congratulations

(

mongychops, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 13:50, archived)

well yea i know rite
hence why you exist, am i rite or am i rite?
(

Firkinfedup last shat on your wife's tits at, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 13:59, archived)

Apart from your use of the word 'hence'
Yes, you are indeed 'rite'
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:06, archived)

hence the recompense for my fence

(

$$ ✅, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:10, archived)

That makes sense

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 15:37, archived)

Sympathetic thread response in light of the above.

(DolphinWhipperer, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:02, archived)

Where's my sympathy, Dolph?

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:08, archived)

*slides brown paper bag across table*

(DolphinWhipperer, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 14:10, archived)

afternoon

(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:00, archived)

a mod approved post
i like it
(

$$ ✅, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:06, archived)

satisfaction guaranteed*
*not a guarantee
(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:14, archived)

You know what, it is 'n all.

(

G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:06, archived)

i'm very trustworthy

(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:13, archived)

yo

(

mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:10, archived)

'sup

(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:14, archived)

chilling, little bit of illing

(

mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:18, archived)

quantify your illing please

(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 13:04, archived)

On a scale of Wack to Def

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 13:13, archived)

Take me down to Welwyn Garden City
Where the grass is green / And the girls are pretty
(DolphinWhipperer, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:13, archived)

nah, bit busy

(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:15, archived)

Doing what?
We agreed this in advance. Why do you always pull out at the last moment?
(DolphinWhipperer, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:16, archived)

so i can spunk on your tits

(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:19, archived)

Oh, you're a charmer

(DolphinWhipperer, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:19, archived)

now put your knickers on and make me a cup of tea

(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:31, archived)

what will he strain the tea leaves with if he puts his knickers back on?

(sock puppet 94980 your personal details here, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:33, archived)

mmm... yeasty

(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:38, archived)

it's how they invented Ovaltine

(sock puppet 94980 your personal details here, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:43, archived)

He's washing his beard

(

mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:19, archived)

38.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lp3i9ejsLh1qg39ewo1_500.gif
(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:42, archived)

You're right about the grass, anyway.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 13:42, archived)

my heart's just not in this 'working' thing, mano

(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:14, archived)

was it ever? be honest now

(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:15, archived)

I'm sure I was destined for something more along the lines of international playboy or drunken hobo, I dunno

(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:29, archived)

international hobo sounds more likely

(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:31, archived)

a Glaswegian tramp in St Pancras?

(sock puppet 94980 your personal details here, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:35, archived)

now you're talking
how do I apply?
(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:35, archived)

buy a single to Carlisle and then hide in the bogs

(sock puppet 94980 your personal details here, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:37, archived)

the Mods are all cunts
/ac
(sock puppet 94980 your personal details here, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:30, archived)

more of this sort of thing

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:31, archived)

all mods are cunts but not all cunts are mods
remember that
(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:35, archived)

deep, man
like your cunt
(sock puppet 94980 your personal details here, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:35, archived)

how deep is your cunt? (how deep, how deep is your cunt?) i really need to know

(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:43, archived)

why?

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:31, archived)

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Afternoon
(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:31, archived)

what's that?

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:32, archived)

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia
(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:36, archived)

I don't understand all this gibberish

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:42, archived)

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gibberish
(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:45, archived)

He probably needs it explained that he has to move his mouse cursor over the link and press the button on it.
(Baggenfrock get fucked, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:42, archived)

oh good, soon be evening then

(

MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:32, archived)

the hype for the 'evening' thread starts... NOW

(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:37, archived)

i love the build up, it's a great atmosphere, it's electric

(

MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:43, archived)

have you decided what you're wearing for it yet?

(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:45, archived)

I'm going to wear a single sock, same as always.

(Baggenfrock get fucked, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:47, archived)

oh god, syncubus confirmed

(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:50, archived)

YAY!

(sock puppet 94980 your personal details here, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 13:05, archived)

balloon hat, balloon pants and a spangly boob tube whatever that is, my stylist is sorting it

(

MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:49, archived)

hawt

(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 13:43, archived)

raargh....no one understands you, she-bear

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:57, archived)

hah, i love that

(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 13:04, archived)

It's gotten me out of more scrapes than you can imagine

(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 13:13, archived)

are you sure?
i can imagine at least 46 scrapes
(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 13:39, archived)

47
You're forgetting....you know...that
(

Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 13:47, archived)

WE AGREED NEVER TO TALK ABOUT THAT TIME

(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 13:58, archived)

raining too

(

mongychops, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 13:00, archived)

still warm though
the worst kind of weather
(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 13:05, archived)

playing havoc with my sniffles

(

mongychops, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 13:10, archived)

I can cope with morning, it's clearly defined
but what's with all this afternoon nonsense?
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 13:19, archived)

do i need to link the wiki page again?

(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 13:44, archived)

But the wiki says afternoon can end around 9:30 in the summer
which is outrageously wrong.
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 13:46, archived)

Morning

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 9:22, archived)

'ello poppet

(

M o D, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 9:25, archived)

'reet?

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 9:26, archived)

The Beeb are dropping by a little later to take my old kendo armour
to Japan for the F1 Japanese GP...

My shitty first set of armour, to Japan, the home of kendo, where you'll find a shop willing to lend you high quality kit for your telly program in every single town...
(

GrandmaOfShoes, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 9:30, archived)

cool.
you making much from it?
(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 9:31, archived)

A small donation to the British Squad

(

GrandmaOfShoes, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 9:35, archived)

cool

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 9:36, archived)

a i
(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 10:00, archived)

a e
(sock puppet 94980 your personal details here, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 10:03, archived)

I taught Mr Miyagi everything there is to know about Karate.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 9:33, archived)

bet you didn't

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 9:36, archived)

Nice one.
Sounds great.
(

GrandmaOfShoes, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 9:37, archived)

I'll take your patronising attitude over MONO!'s cynicism, any day.

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 10:11, archived)

oh, I thought... it's just you said you taught Miyagi Karate?
Were... Were you lying?
(

GrandmaOfShoes, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 10:20, archived)

pretty sure it's illegal to lie on the internet

(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 10:36, archived)

I'd never tell lies, especially not on here.
I'm just terribly upset by MONO!'s attitude.
(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 10:46, archived)

bet you're not

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 11:16, archived)

AM TOO!

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 11:31, archived)

nuh uh

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 11:42, archived)

I'M TELLING!

(

monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 11:53, archived)

ee oo

hur hur hur
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 9:38, archived)

ha!
boob
(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 9:38, archived)

only one though
but it's dropping by, ahahaha
(

Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 9:47, archived)

lol

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 9:43, archived)

roflmfaottylkthanksbye

(

2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 9:47, archived)

haha :)

(

GrandmaOfShoes, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 9:56, archived)

GPs in Japan have to wear armour?
Must be pretty rough out there.
(

2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 9:46, archived)

they do their prostate exams with a kendo stick

(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 9:51, archived)

hence the screaming

(

GrandmaOfShoes, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 9:57, archived)

Don't think I'd like working out there, I'd worry about having to commit Seppuku if I made a mistake.

(

2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 10:38, archived)

how do you know you wouldn't enjoy committing seppuku?
give it a try
(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 10:50, archived)

I'll try it on someone else first and see if they like it. Do you want to volunteer?

(

2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:03, archived)

i think you've fundamentally misunderstood the concept

(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 12:03, archived)

alright MONO!

(

mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 9:31, archived)

sup dawg

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 9:31, archived)

double morning!

(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 9:32, archived)

m-m-m-m-m-m-multi morning

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 9:36, archived)

morning spree

(

manolith hooray for me, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 9:38, archived)

Morntality

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 9:43, archived)

head morning!

(

2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 10:12, archived)

ultra morning!

(

2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 9:46, archived)

nice

(

$$ ✅, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 9:33, archived)

aight

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 9:36, archived)

I missed the first morning thread so I'm glad to see this here
morning MONO!
(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 9:42, archived)

Good Morning
Thank you for contacting B3ta /talk.

I'm afraid we're closed now, if your matter is urgent then please feel free to shove it.

Thanks and regards

You're Mum
(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 9:44, archived)

I'll try bugs and feature requests instead

(

tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 10:01, archived)

'reet?

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 10:02, archived)

MONO!

(sock puppet 94980 your personal details here, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 10:02, archived)

shambolo!

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 10:04, archived)

easy now ... I'm in deep disguise here

(sock puppet 94980 your personal details here, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 11:17, archived)

sorry

(

MONO!, Fri 26 Sep 2014, 11:22, archived)

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