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morning

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 7:03, archived)
fannies

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 7:42, archived)
woah hey there what about titties?

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 7:44, archived)
I like to vary it a bit, might say bottoms tomorrow, you never know, that's the crazy kind of thing I get up to

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 7:45, archived)
but tomorrow's the weekend

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:06, archived)
bottoms

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:07, archived)
hiya

(I helped save b3ta! The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 7:57, archived)
helloTheDovestone

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:07, archived)
alright

(I helped save b3ta! MONO!, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 7:59, archived)
alright
did you enjoy your day off yesterday?
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:07, archived)
yes
surprisingly
(I helped save b3ta! MONO!, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:20, archived)
BUMHOLES

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:07, archived)
any species in particular?

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:19, archived)
I just had breakfast with the the Dean of the college.
Nice guy. Paid for my breakfast too.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:10, archived)

with off
(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:11, archived)

the
of the college Gaffney
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:25, archived)
The dean Gaffney?

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:41, archived)
Because I'm a good person, I chose to ignore the superfluous 'the'

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:43, archived)
Thanx m8

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:45, archived)

breakfast grunty sweaty man-love
(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:32, archived)
Not after breakfast, can't do sex after a big fry up

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:42, archived)
Hullo Godby

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:25, archived)
but my name's not Godby

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:26, archived)
It's not Grrrmachine either, but Godby's got a nice ring to it

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:29, archived)
Ring. Like a bottom. Lol. Because of the fingerings joke from that other thread.
Good work.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:42, archived)
oh yeah!
hahahaha
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:43, archived)
You're a top comedian and you don't even know it.

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:45, archived)
I was ready for this one

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:29, archived)
how did you prepare for it?

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:30, archived)
simply by waking at a more appropriate time

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:38, archived)
+n
you're welcome
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:56, archived)
I knew you had it in you
so to speak
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:31, archived)
I couldn't have managed without the love and support of all my great internet chums

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:39, archived)
*loves & supports*
*farts*
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:39, archived)
I'm going out for lunch and drinks at my employer's expense today
unfortunately so are all their other employees
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:41, archived)
Ah yes
I've got my christmas lunch thing next thursday. It all comes down to who you sit next to. I've had a couple of good ones, and a couple of deeply boring ones. The people who like to talk about work while drinking are the worst.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:42, archived)
there is no one of interest

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:58, archived)
You could get your own back on the boring people of your workshop and just bang on about folk music or other dull bollocks

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:59, archived)
^this
or go on a 'meat is murder' tirade
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 9:00, archived)
oddly I'm not the only veggie

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 9:12, archived)
It's not fun if people agree with you
OK...what about "While I disapprove of their methods, I'm completely behind what ISIS stand for"

y/n?
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 9:16, archived)
Actually, Windy should try this
I reckon his mates would be interested to hear more, and propose a considered and measured retort.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 9:17, archived)
Please don't call them mates

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 11 Dec 2015, 9:25, archived)
sorry
I meant it more as in workmates, rather than friends.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 9:29, archived)
I don't have a workshop
but you're right, I have nothing to offer that they would find interesting either.
It's like we speak different languages or summat
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 9:01, archived)
they're probably greek

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 9:17, archived)
Get drunk. Vomit on HR

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:43, archived)
we don't have an HR, but I shall certainly get drunk

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:55, archived)
You don't?
Then who do you have to be careful who you say things in front of?
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:56, archived)
wait, did that sentence make sense?

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:56, archived)
Y

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:58, archived)
I understood it, which I think is the key thing with communication of any kind
to answer your question, I don't have to be careful in front of anyone.
I'm a maverick, a firebrand, I get drunk and shoot my mouth off and no one cares
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 9:00, archived)
^wild eyed loner who plays by his own rules
god, I'm so hot for you right now
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 9:01, archived)
I know x

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 9:02, archived)
I was planning on going to mine an hour early
taking a book with me and getting a couple of pints down me before the others arrive.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 9:05, archived)
I'm going to get stoned first

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 9:11, archived)
Man, I wish I could do that
There will be so many people there I don't think they'd notice!
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 9:15, archived)
same here
but since 6 people were fired or have quit this month, it'll hopefully be a sombre, miserable affair
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:47, archived)
+ and a happy new yeeaaaar!

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:52, archived)
This is terrible, but I appear to be craving a sausage & egg mcmuffin

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:54, archived)
I'll get you one
and a strawberry milkshake
(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:55, archived)
oh yes please
can I still have the hash brown and an orange juice please? I don't like their coffee lol
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:55, archived)
I can't go now, soz

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:58, archived)
that's cool

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 9:00, archived)
I could try again about 11ish if that helps?

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 9:00, archived)
bit close to lunch innit
nah, it's ok. Maybe next time. Thanks tho
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 9:01, archived)

www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Sausage+Egg+McMuffin
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 9:07, archived)
Blocked, thank goodness

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 9:10, archived)

i.imgur.com/tahSLQU.png
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 9:26, archived)
That
seems unlikely
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 9:29, archived)
Approximately 87% of entries on urbandictionary are obviously fictitious 'sex' acts that no-one has ever done in real life
and have probably been invented by a spotty, sniggering 13-year-old virgin.
(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 10:50, archived)
sick

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 9:13, archived)
Yes, that sounds like a real thing that people would do for fun.

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 9:30, archived)
I got one of those by mistake, the other day (I ordered bacon, but couldn't be bothered querying it).
It was revolting. And don't get me started on their "pancake syrup".
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 9:21, archived)
It's the only thing in McDonalds I like
We're like the Montagues & the Capulets :(
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 9:29, archived)
Very true.
If your son comes anywhere near my daughter, I will end you both.

McDonald's food is tolerable, at best, but when it comes down to a choice between there and Subway for breakfast, I worry that my life has taken a wrong turn.
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 9:33, archived)
No one should be forced to make that choice

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 9:36, archived)
I think I've convinced the kids that hightailing it up the road to the nearest Premier Inn is a better choice.
Unlimited cereal, muffins, croissants, etc, and a fry up - cheap breakfast win.
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 9:41, archived)
sup

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:55, archived)
I just had to google "how to sign a christmas card"

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 8:59, archived)
with faeces!

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 9:00, archived)
+ Judy in disguise

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 11 Dec 2015, 9:30, archived)
Its like Kyle hysteria has returned

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 21:06, archived)
I'd forgotten about that magnolia bellend
thanks mongy
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 21:06, archived)
He did the stuff other people had done before, like a repeat, great forum

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 21:09, archived)
sometimes I think you're a washed-up old has-been
and then you go and drag out a name like emo wannabe journalist Karl Hysteria and a glint of the old trollmaster shines through.

You fucking cunt.
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 21:11, archived)
I think you are probably right on all, but I enjoy b3ta, males me laugh, we've all been here ages for the lols

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 21:14, archived)
smashing forum, great times

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 21:16, archived)
hahahaha yeah

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 21:18, archived)
Your missus will start to balloon now, final month she'll get huge, give it a month of breast feeding and you will see the best here tits will ever be, get a pic, hth

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 21:17, archived)
Forum posters say this place was bettersay before , short memories I sau

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 21:07, archived)
I was bad with a keybored, I'm shitter with my phone, I let it ale it's own mind up, soz

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 21:11, archived)
an hero

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 21:43, archived)
Itv 4

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 22:35, archived)
I really don't want this to become a thing so could somebody push all this shit down the board pls

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 21:05, archived)
hey it's Thursday

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 20:52, archived)
cheer up, it's christmas

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 19:58, archived)
I can't believe they deleted your gif from qftw
that should have won
(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 20:02, archived)
the one that won was the one that should've won

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 20:07, archived)
someone has the job of deleting all the best posts at the end of every qftw
I bet it's manolith, that's why he hasn't quite found the time to give me my old account back
(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 20:09, archived)
He did have time. He's given it to me. I just need to find a nice festive occasion to use it.

(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 20:10, archived)
this is precisely the kind of shameful treatment I have come to expect from b3ta

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 20:12, archived)
It's all in-jokes and bullying now

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 20:13, archived)
manolith touched a dog on the bumhole

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 20:15, archived)
have you tried asking him nicely

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 20:13, archived)
that's not really my style is it

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 20:16, archived)
The fat one at works favourite Christmas song is that one with the bloke from the Poges.

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Dec 2015, 20:04, archived)
I coulda been someone

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 20:10, archived)
Is his drinking anthem "Tubthumping" by Cumbawumba, by any chance?

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 20:25, archived)
I don't like to speak to him if I can help it.
If he ever mentions it, I'll let you know.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Dec 2015, 20:29, archived)
Cheers

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 20:40, archived)
Cheers

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 20:42, archived)
office twat deliberately blasted out a Michael Buble playlist of christmas hits to wind me up.

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 20:07, archived)
I've never heard Michael Buble but in my head he's exactly the same as Michael Bolton

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 20:09, archived)
Imagine frank sinatra put through the wash cycle so much that he's gone all faded and developed those little bobbles that over-washed fabrics developed
THAT'S why he's called Buble.
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 20:13, archived)
someone told me I had to listen to "Joe" "Bonamassa" last week
I did, he was shit
(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 20:17, archived)
also, Adele is fat

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 20:19, archived)
hey, how do I write a function that returns an analog pin?

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 20:21, archived)
pass a number in, read that pin number, return the value

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 20:23, archived)
yeah, I just need a syntax example
cos I need to use int instead of void, and return's got to be in there too somewhere.
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 20:27, archived)

int pinValue (pinNumber) {
return analogRead(pinNumber);
}

Serial.print (pinValue(7); //returns value on pin 7
(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 20:27, archived)
make sure you put it outside of loop() and setup()

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 20:28, archived)
thanks Frank, you're the BEST

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 20:34, archived)
cheers AEthelfrith of Bernicia, you're the best
I've got a state machine and I want to reuse a few of the states but with different input/output pins, so saying "if the prevState was x then use this motor and that sensor, but if it's y then do that". It's almost like a choose your own fucking adventure book.
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 20:37, archived)
there comes a time when you've got to look at adding extra circuitry to the Arduino
multiplexers, optoisolators and so forth

just a thought
(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 20:41, archived)
yeah, but this is only ten motors and seven sensors, it's no biggie
I'm basically trying to max out the pins before I step into that sort of territory. Gonna use a couple of the interrupts this time too
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 20:43, archived)
Trend 963

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 20:50, archived)
963L or 963S though?

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 20:51, archived)
lolLol Lol Lol Lol Lol

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 20:54, archived)
I thought I'd already posted in this thread

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 20:22, archived)
yeah well

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 20:24, archived)
thought wrong then didn't you

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 20:27, archived)
hey it's ok, I'm back now

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:12, archived)
you were away?

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:14, archived)
cool spuds

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:17, archived)
I'm fairly confident today will be the day manolith gives me my old account back

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:18, archived)
maybe if you took him off ignore

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:19, archived)
you're rather jumping to conclusions there m8, just saying

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:22, archived)
you're right, you will never get that account back

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:26, archived)
I reckon Modolith should bring it back and give it to somebody else instead.

(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 18:05, archived)
well this is bound to upset somebody

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:18, archived)
I hardly think that's likely, I'm the number 1 poster round here I'll have you know

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:18, archived)
I find all of this terribly upsetting

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:19, archived)
don't worry, I'm going out again in a bit
I only stopped by to say I was back
(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:21, archived)
oh

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:22, archived)
I NO RITE

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:23, archived)
GOOD
don't let the door hit your arse on the way out
(Baggenfrock get fucked, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:23, archived)
I'm almost certain that he won't
I mean...I think it would be harder to make that happen, wouldn't it?
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:25, archived)
not with that attitude

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:27, archived)
I do quit to easily, I won't lie

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:32, archived)
sweet

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:25, archived)
might do a face swap and post it on /board

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:26, archived)
who would you swap faces with?

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:27, archived)
not sure
any suggestions?
(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:29, archived)
Floella Benjamin

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:31, archived)
Incidentally, I saw her not very long ago
and she doesn't look a day older than when she was on tv when I was a kid. She's certainly ageing better than I am.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:32, archived)
she married a honkie

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:33, archived)
Floella did?
Well there you go
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:33, archived)
But my wife married a cracker, and she's ageing horribly

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:35, archived)
crackers are quite dry and require some form of moisture

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:39, archived)
Her husband doesn't look dissimilar to TH

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:47, archived)
Oh, the similarities are staggering

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:51, archived)
I've got a song for you for my way home.
interior crocodile Alligator
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:57, archived)
I have no idea what any of that was about
Am I old?
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 17:12, archived)
I dunno either.
Home now though.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Dec 2015, 17:13, archived)
Have a good one
regretting saying that we could go into town :(
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 17:14, archived)
i once saw a prossie that looked like her

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:38, archived)
That's a vaguely appealing prospect.
I'd stick it in her round window, if you know what I mean.

Hold on, do you spend a lot of time in the company of ladies of ill repute?
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:42, archived)
nah, i was in that london and went to a corner shop at about 2am
as i was walking towards her, i thought 'that lady looks like nineties celebrity floella benjamin' and then she asked if i was looking for a good time.
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:50, archived)
Haha
Did she ask you to pick a window?
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:51, archived)
no, i was completely taken aback by the question and sort of blurted out 'oh, no thanks. sorry!'

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:55, archived)
Hmm...not a very colourful ending to the story
Feel free to use my ending in future.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:56, archived)
phwoar!

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 17:22, archived)
I once saw one who looked like Hamble

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:50, archived)
as in -le-rice?

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:55, archived)
she was a big girl
She didn't have so much an arse, as a town hall
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 17:03, archived)

i.imgur.com/aikciAe.gifv
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:29, archived)
He's got it all figured out

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:33, archived)
I like an Eagles track that isn't Hotel California
Is there anything you like that isn't the famous version? Like a Michael Cain film that isn't The Italian Job? or pornography that doesn't feature double penetration?
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:38, archived)
meet the feebles
early peter jackson film
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:40, archived)
I didn't manage to finish that
but his one about the mother that gets bitten by a monkey is one of the few 80s horror movies that's still watchable.
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:45, archived)
ah, the sumatran rat monkey
that's braindead or, outside the uk, dead/alive
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:49, archived)
"I kick arse for the Lord" is one of the finest lines in 20th century cinema.

(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:55, archived)
yes. yes it is.
pity my video doesn't work any more :/
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:56, archived)
I've been a bit argumentative with TH and I just want to apologise.
My favourite Burzum album isn't filosofem.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:41, archived)
is it Det som engang var?

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:44, archived)
Yes

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:46, archived)
commonness
with two Ns
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:49, archived)
Thanks m8

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:56, archived)
That was the first one I heard
so I have fond memories of it.
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:51, archived)
but the actual track "Det Som" on Hvis Lysett Tar Oss is better

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:59, archived)
The 1995 burzum/aske compilation is a good one too.

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Dec 2015, 15:00, archived)
No need, dear boy, no need

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 15:49, archived)
I hate the fuckin' Eagles man

(Baggenfrock get fucked, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:41, archived)
they* are not too fond of you either
*and everyone else on the planet
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:44, archived)
merry fucking christmas to you too

(Baggenfrock get fucked, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:47, archived)
The Ipcress File is a good fillum.

(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:44, archived)
I don't like the band Love, but I like the version of their song 7 and 7 Is by the Soul Benders
is that the sort of thing you mean?
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:46, archived)
Having read and understood the question
I'd say no.
(Baggenfrock get fucked, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:49, archived)
who has time to read and understand the question these days?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:50, archived)
I ran out of pine kernels and had to make pesto with sunflower seeds and it was much better.
Italians are culinary idiots.
(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:56, archived)
I seem to recall making pesto with cashews, once.
It was probably alright.
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 15:17, archived)
Monster munch and branston pickle is my favourite recipe.

(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 15:31, archived)
Where does he smear it?

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 16:10, archived)
pfffffft

(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 17:05, archived)
I like the b side of Silver Machine
7 by 7
(I helped save b3ta! fuscous, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:56, archived)
I'm trying to watch the varsity rugby in the workshop,
But the fat cunt is just banging on about when he used to play, and how hard he was, and how he broke some blokes nose. I'm trying to ignore him and just type on my phone buy he won't shut up.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Dec 2015, 15:03, archived)
break his nose

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 15:04, archived)
The world is full of fat under achievers who played school rugby and are now lifelong experts.
They are definitely worse than soccer wankers.
(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 15:05, archived)
Yeah, at least football wanders tend to wander off if you ignore them or say you dont watch it,
Rugby wankers just don't stop banging on about how they smashed up Billy from the school down the way on a run for a try.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Dec 2015, 15:07, archived)
How is your hand-eye coordination?
Lob something at their face as hard as you can. If they have genuine rugby skillz they should have no problem catching or deflecting it. If they've not they'll lose some teeth and dignity and shut up for ten minutes.
(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 15:19, archived)
never met one
maybe it's just your friends/colleages
(Baggenfrock get fucked, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 15:59, archived)
I well like grapes
I used to like all three main varieties, but the blacks and greens have not been so great in recent years. What do you well like but have varities that aren't quite as good in recent years?
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:28, archived)
breasts

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:33, archived)
oh

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:35, archived)
Near the top
www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-35059685
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:18, archived)
I don't really know what a shialabeouf is

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:30, archived)
Sworn enemy of Sunni Labeouf, ahahaha.

(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:31, archived)
Why don't you phone him and find out

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:32, archived)
the line is busy

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:34, archived)
Blatant racism.
I hope the Green Panthers come and fuck you up GOOD.
(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:38, archived)
GREEN RAGE

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:42, archived)
Fear Of A Green Planet

(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:04, archived)
Wah now. 3?

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:39, archived)
Black. Green. Gilbert.

(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:40, archived)
Piss off.

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:40, archived)
Bit rude.

(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:41, archived)
But?

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:48, archived)
Puss?

(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:52, archived)
Yeah, no one saw that

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:26, archived)

Gilbert Arse
(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:42, archived)
good heavens

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:43, archived)
Lexi belle

(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:39, archived)
Fucksake, not you as well.

(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:43, archived)
I know you're more of a Ron Jeremy fan.

(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:54, archived)
*sproing!*

(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:04, archived)
You know how some people are odd looking and then grow into their faces as they get older?
Not our Ron.
(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:07, archived)
I love that photo of him as Mario Mario.
It's just so endlessly disturbing.
(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:32, archived)
They've changed those nice stuffed little peppers I used to get from the shop up the road.

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:48, archived)
Hang on, this is brilliant. Read it.
www.independent.co.uk/arts-entertainment/music/news/that-wu-tang-clan-martin-shkreli-2m-album-deal-has-an-amazing-caveat-a6767546.html
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:52, archived)
You are sooo six hours ago.

(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:56, archived)
Wait, did someone else post this link and I missed it? If so, glasscock

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:18, archived)
Wow
I read yesterday that the people who made Die Hard were contractually obligated to offer Frank Sinatra the lead role, based on a deal he made when he was in the (sort of) prequel back in the 60's.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:58, archived)
What was the sort of prequel? And surely if it was made first it's not a prequel at all.

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:20, archived)
Well of course it is
The one before the sequel is the prequel, right? In any case, it's the first story, the sequel of which Die Hard is based upon.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:30, archived)

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Detective_%281968_film%29
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:31, archived)
I think it's just the first of the series if it's done in order. I think the term prequel only applies if the earlier part of the time line is made first.
Also, you didn't actually sat what the film was that were having a semantic discussion of
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:33, archived)
chocolate
dark chocolate is great, white chocolate is nasty and milk chocolate has got far too sweet for its own good
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:57, archived)
I'd counter with
Not all dark chocolate is great, not all white chocolate is nasty and not all milk chocolate is too sweet. Other than that, I completely agree.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:59, archived)
Chocolate is for kids and blobbing birds.

(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:00, archived)
Come on, that's Frank talking, not you

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:02, archived)
I prefer cheese.
Chocolate is the anti-cheese.
(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:05, archived)
I prefer to live in a world where cheese and chocolate can live together on the same plate

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:09, archived)
Alright gonz.

(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:10, archived)
Cheese and chocolate is actually pretty common

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:13, archived)
Prove it

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:21, archived)
Well I can't, can I
But I have seen, and eaten cheese & chocolate several times
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:23, archived)
Just because it's pretty common in your world, doesn't make it pretty common everywhere.
The world doesn't begin and end in pompey m8
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:26, archived)
Well how would I know that?

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:28, archived)
One could also argue that just because you haven't noticed it, doesn't mean it's not there

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:28, archived)
Of course they could, I don't know if it's common or not, but I'm not self centred enough to assume my experience of something is the definitive indicator of its commoness.
Commoninity. Commonitionism. Commonly? Fuck
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:35, archived)
commonality

(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 15:10, archived)
means something different

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 15:39, archived)
ssshhh!
i'm trying to confuse him!
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 15:42, archived)
have you tried chocolate philadelphia?
it's fucking horrible
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:21, archived)
You've already made your feelings about chocolate clear, so this comes as no surprise

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:22, archived)
would you try marmite and flumps?

(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:24, archived)
you can get marmite chocolate

(Baggenfrock get fucked, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:25, archived)
that sounds so wrong that i may have to try it

(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:27, archived)
it's not that great TBH
chocolate with salty stuff generally does work though
(Baggenfrock get fucked, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:32, archived)
i love chocolate pretzels

(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:35, archived)
Well of course I would
I'd try anything that I know isn't actually harmful. Christmas pudding and horseradish, for instance, is really nice.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:29, archived)
Mustard and ice cream isn't though

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:29, archived)
you can get wassabi kitkats in japan

(Baggenfrock get fucked, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:30, archived)
wasabi peas are nice

(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:37, archived)
i like christmas pudding
i might give that a try
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:35, archived)
white chocolate and cranberry is nice
adds a nice sharpness to it
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:20, archived)
bumholes

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:09, archived)
Which is your favourite bumhole?

(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:10, archived)

jelly.b3ta.com/talk/7872464
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:14, archived)
hopes and dreams

(Baggenfrock get fucked, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:18, archived)
downs syndrome

(Baggenfrock get fucked, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:21, archived)
eastenders

(Baggenfrock get fucked, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:22, archived)
pubs

(Baggenfrock get fucked, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:22, archived)
films

(Baggenfrock get fucked, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:23, archived)
hand jobs

(Baggenfrock get fucked, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:23, archived)
Cadbury's Roses
where have the coffee cremes gone? motherfuckers have ruined christmas.
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:26, archived)
wouldn't know m8
I get quality street from waitrose
(Baggenfrock get fucked, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 14:29, archived)
just remembered I started a thread here, was it good, did I miss much?

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:34, archived)
You were AMAZING darling.
I came so hard I thought my entire cunt was going to flop out.
(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:35, archived)
you'll probably need another operation on your wee pipe when I get done with you

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:39, archived)
Oh boy!

(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:40, archived)
I look like I'm sitting on a Portuguese Man'o'War.

(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:40, archived)
good lord

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:41, archived)
heavens to Betsy

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:42, archived)
man alive

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:44, archived)

I look like
'o'War
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:50, archived)
sacre bleu

(Baggenfrock get fucked, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:51, archived)

look
I'm sitting on a Portuguese
(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:53, archived)
that's a good one

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:00, archived)
I thought it was ok

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:38, archived)
I might make maore effort to participate in this one!

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:40, archived)
i didn't know don cheadle was maori

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:44, archived)
What?

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:45, archived)
you 'eard

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:48, archived)
forgot to do a mouseover there, fuck y'all, my head hurts today

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:45, archived)
dunno I've been busy, soz

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:38, archived)
I wish that Ronald Trump was in charge, he'd get rid of all the darkies

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:40, archived)
this fella
www.80snostalgia.com/files/fluperkins.jpg
(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:45, archived)
clearly-identifiable pieces of dismembered prostitute
/ac
(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:48, archived)
tell you who's a cunt, anyone who lives in a place that gets flooded every cunting year then whines when their house gets flooded
fucking whining flood cunts, go live up a hill you stupid cuntlicks
(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:50, archived)
it's ok all our insurance is going up to cover those wankers

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:53, archived)
fucking wankers, we should go there and just smash shit up

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:55, archived)
Wait until they've had their insurance and bought new stuff.
There's no point smashing stuff that's already fucked.
(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:58, archived)
good to see a whole 11 posts beating the end of week qftw cull

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:07, archived)
I came last
story of my life
(Baggenfrock get fucked, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:25, archived)
Death to qftw

(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:40, archived)
Nicking stubby pencils from William Hills

(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:41, archived)
they don't use pencils tho do they

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:42, archived)
I dunno. I haven't been in a betting shop since the 1990s.
They better still do stubby pens at Argos.
(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:56, archived)
They're phasing those out, in favour of tablet computers.

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:02, archived)
I'M PHASING YOUR MUM OUT IN FAVOUR OF MY FUCKING FIST, M8

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:06, archived)
so... whatever you were 'using' his mum for, you're now going to use your fist instead?
i'm not sure that's quite the retort you intended
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:13, archived)
COME ON, USE YOUR IMAGINATION M8

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:15, archived)
i am, i'm imagining her ditching you because of your unimpressive willy

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:23, archived)
NEVERTHELESS

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:26, archived)
You're right. She'll never have had less than that leaky little nubbin.

(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:39, archived)
It probably is.
He's left her as a gnarled husk.
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:15, archived)
You can still get the pencils in screwfix
I got my wallet out to pay at the till and about a dozen of them went scattering across the counter. I haven't been back since.
(Baggenfrock get fucked, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:18, archived)
sub-par tbh

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:40, archived)
at least everyone knows what day it is now

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:42, archived)
yeah but I don't know if it's ok and you're here yet

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:43, archived)
these facts are implied in the post telling you which day it is

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:45, archived)
might go to sainsbury's then

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:46, archived)
right, not Waitrose then
fucking pleb
(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:47, archived)
well no, because I'd have to go to Kenilworth to do that, whereas sainsbury's is just over there

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:49, archived)
oh man it's raining

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:49, archived)
not here it isn't

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:53, archived)
Schrödinger's weather report.

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:03, archived)
i was in a waitrose this morning
just doing a bit of sightseeing
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:51, archived)
haha, "Kenilworth", like that's even a thing

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:51, archived)
wouldn't it be really funny if there was a surveyor there that specialised in valuing animal accomodation business premises

(Baggenfrock get fucked, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:57, archived)
hey it's Thursday

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 11:12, archived)
what's your fucking point?

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 11:13, archived)
added thursday to the list.

(I helped save b3ta! Zuowan, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 11:16, archived)

he's making a list, he's checking it twice, he's going to spell out what's shiter than shite, grrrmachine is going to frown!
(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 11:26, archived)
He's happier when you're sleeping, he hates when you're awake
Does it matter who's been bad or good? "who cares, for fuck's sake?"
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 11:29, archived)
oh hahahaha

(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 11:34, archived)

I like this though
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 11:30, archived)
copyright blockage...fml

(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 11:34, archived)
damn those 'suits' at Viacom
damn them to hell
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:12, archived)
and people think we thursday around

(I helped save b3ta! Zuowan, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 11:14, archived)

b3ta.com/talk/7867464
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 11:17, archived)
WOOHOO WEEKEND

(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 11:23, archived)

WEEKEND, BOOOOYYYS, I'M OVER HE-ERE!
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 11:25, archived)
haha
oh dear. I'm slightly ashamed that I laughed at that.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 11:27, archived)
clickin dis

(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 11:27, archived)
Bloody part-timers.

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 11:30, archived)
I might buy some loafers so that I can loaf more inefficiently.

(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 11:31, archived)
What the fuck are loafers anyway?

(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 11:32, archived)
old man slip-ons ... that's disappointing

(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 11:33, archived)
Were you hoping for shoes made of bread, or something?

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 11:40, archived)
I dunno what I was expecting.
Something a lush would wear with his silk smoking jacket in the 1930s maybe.
(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 11:48, archived)
Pipe and slippers is the way to go.
Optional robe.

I used to think that Hugh Hefner was the coolest man on earth.
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 11:58, archived)
I'd just like to say that I knew that was what that was going to be before I looked at it

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:19, archived)
and I'D just like to say, what do you want, a fucking medal?

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:21, archived)
well yeah, a bit of recognition wouldn't go amiss

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:32, archived)

www.yarnharlot.ca/blog/medal-web-large.jpg
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:47, archived)
I shall wear it with pride

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:33, archived)
I just want to tell you both, good luck, we're all counting on you

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:23, archived)
I watched that film on mushrooms once and it was even funnier
although the woman in it was a bit scarier
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:33, archived)
The love interest?
Yeah, she's in an advanced state of Skeletorism
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:41, archived)
probably still would mind

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:42, archived)
Isn't she Ted Danson's missus?

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:59, archived)
Nah, you're thinking of Mary Steenburgen

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:16, archived)

b3ta.com/talk/7872413
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 13:35, archived)
used to?

(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:17, archived)
Yeah.
Teenage me would be so disappointed.
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:45, archived)

2.design-milk.com/images/2009/11/bread-shoes-2.jpg
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 11:40, archived)
Woah!
My mind, it is blown.
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 11:41, archived)
That's how they make artisan sourdough.

(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 11:48, archived)
you'd know

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 11:54, archived)
I know. That's why I said it.

(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:20, archived)
you're missing the best part
no MONO!
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 11:54, archived)
You know, someone, I forget who, said "My god, I wish MONO was dead. I really fucking hate him"
and I said to them NO, I said, THAT IS NOT THE ATTITUDE TO HAVE I said.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:09, archived)
hey, i'm happy for him to remain alive
i'd just prefer he did it somewhere with no internet
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:17, archived)
I always say "live and let live"
Well I don't always say it. I've thought it before though.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:20, archived)
Or water.

(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:21, archived)
I love a Thursday

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:12, archived)
Well you know what they say
Thursday is Friday's Friday!™
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:21, archived)
^has a case of the thursdays

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:32, archived)
Fucksake

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:32, archived)
The internet should be culled.

(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:33, archived)
Didn't you hear? Donald Trump's already got Bill Gates on the case.

(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 12:52, archived)
morning

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 7:24, archived)
titties

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 7:27, archived)
titties rise, early in de mornin

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 7:33, archived)
It's Friday! Hooray!

(I helped save b3ta! mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 7:29, archived)
mictoboy, I hate to be the bearer of bad news
but your parents are dead
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 7:54, archived)

morning
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Dec 2015, 7:43, archived)
he'll get fired for that
he's not wearing a tie
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 7:54, archived)
It's facism gone mad

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Dec 2015, 8:01, archived)

good morning
(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:03, archived)

goat massage
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:07, archived)

i.imgur.com/g4cJUmM.gif
(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:28, archived)
wanker

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 8:13, archived)
tosser

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 8:25, archived)
Good morning colleagues

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 8:21, archived)
good morning T. Hats

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 8:28, archived)
i see you as more of a casual acquaintance, tbh

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 9:58, archived)
this is probably why you weren't at the colleagues party round at TH's last night

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:00, archived)
He's made his bed, he can jolly well lie in it

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:13, archived)
oh
I didn't realise it was that sort of party
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:18, archived)
At my place
EVERY party is that sort of party
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:24, archived)
No wonder I never get an invite.

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:25, archived)
I assumed you wouldn't want to come!

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:26, archived)
Good call.

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:36, archived)
^fond wellwisher

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:13, archived)
let's burn this bitch down

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 8:25, archived)
your mum can't be cremated, because it's essentially a chip pan fire

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 8:29, archived)
oh, ok

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 8:30, archived)
I'm afraid I can't accept that it's morning until I've seen your certificate from the Institute of Chartered Morningologists.

(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 8:58, archived)

rni
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 9:01, archived)
You know, I was thinking that just as I typed it.
Surely anyone who's spent as long here as we have is an Emeritus Professor of Mongology by default?
(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 9:50, archived)
I just monged all over your mum.

(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 9:56, archived)

o u
www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=munging
(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:03, archived)
This is why I dress up in zombie makeup and hang around in graves.

(blah di blah di blah blah, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:08, archived)
That, and the pigheaded refusal to accept that you are a middle-aged man with a wife and two children
and no longer a lolwaki teenage goth.
(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 11:33, archived)
I wasn't ready for it

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 9:02, archived)
it doesn't look like i lost any petrol over night, might have to take it to my mates ramp and have a proper look

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 9:13, archived)
try parking it with one set of wheels on the curb
ideally the wheels on the opposite side of the filler. Brim the tank for best results.
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 9:18, archived)
ta, i'm sure my mate andy will fix it, he's got his own garage, tho he really only does gearboxes for customers

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 9:31, archived)
working on fuel tanks is a cunt of a job, especially on RWD motors
so you'd better hope it's just a bit of perished rubber
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 9:40, archived)
Oh, hi.
Sorry I'm late.
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 9:33, archived)
Ems
I'm going into town for late night shopping tonight. Part of me thinks I may try to kill someone, another part of me is trying to focus on getting some sort of hot snack while I'm there. What are your thoughts?
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 9:34, archived)
late night shopping? like people used to do before there was an internet?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 9:37, archived)
I know, I know
Literally everything else we've bought was bought online, but there are some things you need to see in the flesh, as it were.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 9:43, archived)
yeah, especially if there's only a head shot taken from a particular angle

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 9:46, archived)
^tggi

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 9:47, archived)
Are you going with a list of items to buy, or a list of people to buy for?
The former will allow you to get it all done in an efficient manner, and treat yourself to a hot snack when you're done, the latter will inevitably lead to a strong desire to hack to death one, or more, of your fellow shoppers.

Good luck!
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 9:38, archived)
I only really have a couple of bits to get, and I know where to get them
The boys have never been before, so it's more for them really. If there's nothing in the paper tomorrow about a massacre in Commercial Road, you can assume it was a success.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 9:42, archived)
I'm sure you can get through this with booze

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 9:47, archived)
I don't think that's a sensible idea
perhaps I'll have that as a treat when we get back.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 9:48, archived)
ok but bear in mind that it's not just other people that you are going to have to tolerate, but also your own children
stay safe out there x
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 9:54, archived)
I know they all say this, but my kids are reasonably well behaved
But your kind words will resonate with me as I'm trying to push past some fat cunt with a double pushchair
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:14, archived)
You can get quite a lot of shopping into a double buggy.
Dominates the car boot, though. Swings and roundabouts, I suppose.
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:24, archived)
It's not the pushchair
it's more the attitude of some people who own them. They stand in the middle of the school gates so no one can get past, then tut when you ask them to move. God, people with children are fucking dreadful.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:27, archived)
Compulsory sterilisation, that's what's needed.

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:38, archived)
+ if you wanna be a record breakeeerrrrrr!

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:43, archived)
You're taking the kids?
I look forward to their shell-shocked expressions in tomorrow's newspapers.
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 9:53, archived)
"Daddy will be...going away for a while"

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:15, archived)
what, down commercial road?
rather you than me, m8t
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 9:55, archived)
yer

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:12, archived)
good pre-noon

(I helped save b3ta! Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 9:37, archived)
alright woodkovsky

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 9:41, archived)
so you tolerate me?

(I helped save b3ta! Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 9:45, archived)
why wouldn't I?

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:09, archived)
alright Woodkovsky

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 9:46, archived)
alright Woodkovsky

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 9:47, archived)
See? We're WAY more inclusive and friendly than those /links cunts

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 9:48, archived)
I've just opened a Christmas card from a colleague and it has '25th December' printed on the front of it
quite a useful reminder if you're not good with remembering dates, I suppose
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 9:53, archived)
That'd be a rubbish advent calendar.

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 9:56, archived)
it's for all those non-christians we've got now
maybe they thought you were muslamic
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:00, archived)
can a man not commit acts of terrorism without being branded a muslim?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:01, archived)
The IRA really need a concentrated marketing effort

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:33, archived)
sure is. and i'm at the optician
i'm mad, me!
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 9:56, archived)
Pretend to be at the dentist's.
Y'know, as if you couldn't see properly and wandered into the wrong premises. It'll probably be hilarious.
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:00, archived)
haha! what are you like?!

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:01, archived)
*spins bowtie*

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:10, archived)
Short sighted man walks up to the counter and says "cod and chips please"
The man behind the counter says "I'm sorry sir, but this is a library". The man says "Oh sorry...*whispers* cod and chips please".

There.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:24, archived)
popular page

(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:34, archived)
^

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:36, archived)
I'm not sure I see what you're getting at.

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:02, archived)
perhaps you need to go to the optician as well

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:08, archived)
*something about Windy having problems with his looks*

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:29, archived)
I don't bother with opticians
I mean, is there really anything worth seeing these days?
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:15, archived)
it's all just repeats of stuff you've seen before anyway

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:19, archived)
and you can't hear all the words

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:24, archived)
there's nary a tune you can whistle along to
and these new fangled £1 notes don't feel like real money used to
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:29, archived)
I've never used centimetres and I never will
I pay 30 bob, not 1 pound fifty, and if they don't like it they can bloody well sod off. And that's swearing.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:33, archived)
commercial road is not going to know what hit it

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:36, archived)
LOOK OUT CONSUMERS

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:36, archived)
I'm having rather a long one.

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 10:45, archived)
Poss nonce interest?
Thought this might ring a few bells from an enjoyable /board-/talk spat a little while back. Paging brian clugh - clogh - ugh, Shambles

www.facebook.com/AndrewHickinbottomArt/?fref=nf
(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 22:36, archived)
what was the spat?

(I helped save b3ta! mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 22:50, archived)
Accusations of softcore nonce-grot.
Defence along the lines of "She's clearly an adult woman, look at those tits!"
Explanation that "Putting big tits on a cartoon clearly representing a prepubescent girl doesn't make her an 'adult woman', it just makes her a prepubescent girl with big tits. You creepy weirdo."
(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 22:55, archived)
/board will put tits on anything though.

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 23:10, archived)
Cartoon child porn is OK though.
/ac
(blah di blah di blah blah, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 23:05, archived)
fucking hell, he's still relentlessly spamming the same few 'characters' as he was 2 years ago on here

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 5:12, archived)

oh lol
(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 5:25, archived)
Haha, well said, BD.

(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 7:48, archived)
"103,519 people like this"
:/
(I helped save b3ta! Zuowan, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 9:21, archived)
Makes you weep for humanity, dunnit.

(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Thu 10 Dec 2015, 9:51, archived)
Christmas cards
Do you send them? What's the point?
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 21:03, archived)

www.metal-archives.com/images/2/7/8/7/27876_label.jpg
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 21:09, archived)

i.imgur.com/exLxdRJ.jpg
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 9 Dec 2015, 21:10, archived)
I don't know why but an actual lol
maybe it's the scale
(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 21:12, archived)
Print it out for your Christmas cards

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 9 Dec 2015, 21:21, archived)
the pupils are the wrong shape

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 21:08, archived)
...said the headmaster at the newly reopened chernobyl high school

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 21:56, archived)
Oh, so you want an evening thread, but you don't want to post in an evening thread.

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 9 Dec 2015, 21:08, archived)
you added an exclamation mark
it confused me
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 21:10, archived)
Sorry

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 9 Dec 2015, 21:10, archived)
i've got no one to send them to
so whats the point
(Baggenfrock get fucked, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 21:09, archived)
waitwaitwait I KNEW this felt familiar
b3ta.com/talk/7789062#post7789074
we should all just kill ourselves right this minute now
(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 21:11, archived)
it's been a year and it still doesn't make any sense
and now my wife's not talking to me because I don't want to send christmas cards to my parents.
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 21:13, archived)
poor thing, it's probably dawning on her that it might take after you

(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 21:15, archived)
she reached that crushing realisation about four seconds after the pregnancy test turned blue

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 21:18, archived)
if the line turns blue it means it has too many chromosomes
soz.
(Baggenfrock get fucked, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 22:04, archived)
OK. Goodbye Vlad

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 9 Dec 2015, 21:15, archived)
Happy Christmas Grrry!
You must now pass this festive message on to 10 more people or your christmas dinner will be burnt.
(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 21:58, archived)
Milky's gone
Don't want to lose postie too.
(I helped save b3ta! CharlesDexterWard no rush eh, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 22:21, archived)
Evening!
i.imgur.com/S60Yt0u.gifv
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 9 Dec 2015, 20:25, archived)

i.imgur.com/TX0s7cg.jpg
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 9 Dec 2015, 20:31, archived)

i.imgur.com/wwDbhVn.gifv
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 9 Dec 2015, 20:32, archived)
WILDCARD
i.imgur.com/E4lL5Rh.gif
(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 20:33, archived)
You've been in my garden again
haven't you
(I helped save b3ta! CharlesDexterWard no rush eh, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 20:41, archived)
I just can't tell you how much putting 'goats on trampolines' into the search engine of your choice will cheer you up

(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 20:43, archived)

goats do stunts
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 9 Dec 2015, 20:45, archived)
For this I am grateful.

(I helped save b3ta! CharlesDexterWard no rush eh, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 20:45, archived)
Whatever you do, don't say "OK Google" and then "goats at sea" if you have Safesearch off.
Found this out the hard way. :(
(I helped save b3ta! Mr. Tea dole-nonce-amuser extraordinaire, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 22:38, archived)
FUCK A GOAT

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 20:39, archived)
You lost the last of the wild horses, you dink!

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 20:43, archived)
Yeah OK then, just pushing that down the forum

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 18:54, archived)
I don't really have any plans for this thread

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 18:56, archived)
Prolly turn out alright tho

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 18:56, archived)
We'll see I suppose

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 18:56, archived)
Or not

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 18:57, archived)
Not bothered

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 18:57, archived)
it's already one of the best threads of the day

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 19:01, archived)
I peak early evening

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 19:01, archived)
Through your windows...lols

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 19:03, archived)
it is now

(Baggenfrock get fucked, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 19:04, archived)
Its a great forum

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 19:01, archived)
<

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 19:02, archived)
dunno what that is, soz

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 19:02, archived)
a headless duck

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 19:06, archived)
~ <O

(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 19:21, archived)
~>O

(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 19:21, archived)
<O

(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 19:22, archived)

*burp*
(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 19:22, archived)

b3ta.com/talk/7621710
(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 19:24, archived)
it's all in SQUACKL

(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 19:28, archived)
that's fun to say
SQUACKLE!
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 20:13, archived)
I make that noise all the time
And it does NOT smell good :(
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 20:17, archived)
Gonna get some jelly fish.

(blah di blah di blah blah, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 19:06, archived)
We did this before on the forum, you can probably search for my views and I provided links, hth

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 19:08, archived)
GET THIS ONE
cryptomundo.com/wp-content/uploads/12_05_06_b_diver_jellyfish.jpg
(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 19:30, archived)
mmmm
nice mantle
(I helped save b3ta! CharlesDexterWard no rush eh, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 19:35, archived)
Think my petrol tank is leaking, so thats not probably good

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 19:42, archived)
what car?
might just be the o-ring around the fuel pump or a perished hose, hth
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 19:52, archived)
I don't buy what car? soz... lol

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 19:55, archived)
fucking hell mongy

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 19:57, archived)
Get off your high horse punboy

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 20:00, archived)
don't let's fight at this special time of year

(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 20:08, archived)
"don't lets"? What are you, a Jane Austin character?

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 20:09, archived)
^most satisfactory

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 20:12, archived)
Northanger Abbey
page 117, line 9.
(I helped save b3ta! CharlesDexterWard no rush eh, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 20:13, archived)
grrrmachine I am going to let this pass this time, I am putting it down to your baby hormones
however the top two google suggestions are don't let's go down to the dogs tonight, and don't let's be beastly to the germans
(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 20:18, archived)

Don't let's be beastly to the Germans,
For you can't deprive a gangster of his gun!
Though they've been a little naughty
To the Czechs and Poles and Dutch,
I don't suppose those countries
Really minded very much
(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 20:22, archived)
bring back Noel for christmas

(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 20:24, archived)
his best performance was taking a shit in The Italian Job

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 20:39, archived)
don't let's start with how you hate everything ever again

(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 20:44, archived)
I'm saying I like The Italian Job vladimir
don't drag this down into your own pit of negativity
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 20:52, archived)
you stay right away from my pit

(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 20:56, archived)
^ a mystery unravelling

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 21:11, archived)
Don't think Morton-Thiokol do car stuff.

(I helped save b3ta! CharlesDexterWard no rush eh, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 20:02, archived)
They make most of the world's airbags.

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 20:10, archived)
The rest is accounted for by your mum.

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 20:11, archived)
Most of that is probably true.

(I helped save b3ta! CharlesDexterWard no rush eh, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 20:14, archived)
I'm not in favour of this misogynistic objectification of Lucy Worsley

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 18:36, archived)
remaz abdelgader y/n

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 18:38, archived)
both pipes

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 18:43, archived)
she does like a good meerschaum

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 18:46, archived)
Muslims only have one pipe. They're like lizards.

(blah di blah di blah blah, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 18:52, archived)
what, royal?

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 19:02, archived)
Yeah. They wear the big beards and veils to hide their receding chins.

(blah di blah di blah blah, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 19:06, archived)
what awful hair

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 18:52, archived)
dozer can't help it
he lives in a bin
(blah di blah di blah blah, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 18:54, archived)
he is rather grouchy

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 19:01, archived)
Just so you know
I won't be in tomorrow

Cheers
(I helped save b3ta! MONO!, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 16:21, archived)
I can't believe frank is such a twat to do that right then and there
he could've warned us or discussed it before hand
(I helped save b3ta! MONO!, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 16:21, archived)
my question still stands, your answer could determine what I write in my next fan mail to her

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 16:22, archived)
why would you be a fan of hers?

(I helped save b3ta! MONO!, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 16:23, archived)
just go along with it, it'll get funnier if you pretend you believe me, trust me with this

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 16:25, archived)
oh yeah her, ok great
yeah I reckon she doesn't
(I helped save b3ta! MONO!, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 16:27, archived)
soz, got bored of that

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 16:42, archived)
why won't you be in tomorrow, what will you be doing?

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 16:47, archived)
She strikes me as an adventurous type.
After a couple of bottles of wine, she'd be up for anything.
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 16:36, archived)
the dirty cow

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 16:43, archived)
I fear this furrow has been deeply and meaningfully ploughed.

(I helped save b3ta! CharlesDexterWard no rush eh, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 16:49, archived)
I bet she does plops in the shape of a doughnut
a watery foul-smelling doughnut that stains the porcelain on the way to the seaside
(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 16:55, archived)
That's a terrible slur on Lucy's character.

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 16:55, archived)
Not really
Just on her admirers
(I helped save b3ta! CharlesDexterWard no rush eh, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 17:13, archived)
Or even better
Just on her admirers'
(I helped save b3ta! CharlesDexterWard no rush eh, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 17:14, archived)
Cant believe I missed fish chat

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 17:49, archived)
I quite fancy getting a big tank of jelly fish.

(blah di blah di blah blah, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 18:02, archived)
They are shit and rubbish

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 18:07, archived)
I didn't know you were so kinky

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 18:34, archived)

getting a big tank of
(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 18:46, archived)
Cheers

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 18:14, archived)
fish eh? crazy shit there. crazy, crazy shit
do you reckon Lucy Worsley likes it up the trumper?
(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 16:20, archived)
shit post anyway

(I helped save b3ta! MONO!, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 16:22, archived)
that should be the motto of b3ta
/ac
(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 16:26, archived)
I don't listen to Marillion, soz.

(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick &#8207;, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 16:28, archived)
which bit's the trumper?

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 16:42, archived)
where the trumps come out

(AEthelfrith of Bernicia, Wed 9 Dec 2015, 16:44, archived)

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