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This is a question I'm Sorry I've Written A Joke

Challenge: write a joke. As simple joke with a setup and a punchline.

RULES OF ENGAGEMENT

* No isms - keep this light
* Non jokes will be deleted and users temp banned
* No nicked jokes - write one!

So join in and write a bad joke and apologise for it.

Read Latest | Highest Voted

(, Wed 8 Aug 2018, 9:00)
Pages: Latest, 11, 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1

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What sort of spicy chicken betrays you to the Empire
Nando Calrissian
(, Wed 9 May 2018, 16:31, 1 reply, 6 months ago)
why did the cow cross the road?
to get to the udder side
(, Wed 9 May 2018, 16:25, 1 reply, 6 months ago)
I have a growth the exact size and shape of a Sumerian burial chamber.
It's a tomb Ur.
(, Wed 9 May 2018, 15:51, Reply)
Second in line to throne launches probe into Britain's separation from the European Union:
Brexit, pursued by an heir.
(, Wed 9 May 2018, 13:58, 2 replies, latest was 6 months ago)
A woman hears her husband is in hospital and rushes to A&E. The doctor, who is Italian, says: "I'm-a sorry. It-a seems-a your ahsband is-a turning into a tree."
She asks, "Oh my God, is he getting any better?"
Says the doctor: "No! He's-a sick-a more!"

(I swear it's funny out loud.)
(, Wed 9 May 2018, 13:46, 3 replies, latest was 6 months ago)
The world origami championship is going to be on Sky this year.
As a paper-view event.
(, Wed 9 May 2018, 12:04, Reply)
What's the difference between a 70's disco dance floor and your mum after bukkake?
One's a funky space, the other's got a spunky face.
(, Wed 9 May 2018, 10:57, Reply)
What do you say to a non-gender specific person engaged to fit carpets who needs to get a move on but has told you in passing that s/he has a degree in Spanish language
Underlay underlay
(, Wed 9 May 2018, 10:36, 1 reply, 6 months ago)
Is that Alphaville in your pocket, or are you just Big in Japants?

(, Wed 9 May 2018, 10:21, Reply)
What do you call a Star Trek villain who branches out into alternative medicine and R&B?
Chakras Khan
(, Wed 9 May 2018, 10:19, Reply)
What do you call an alien with no eyes?
Alen
(, Wed 9 May 2018, 10:18, Reply)
Why were there so many Crusades?
Because they're so Moorish.
(, Wed 9 May 2018, 9:54, 1 reply, 6 months ago)
What do King's Cross and Yorkshire weather have in common?
T'rain.
(, Wed 9 May 2018, 9:32, Reply)
What kind of cheese does Han solo hate?
Bobba Fetta
(, Wed 9 May 2018, 8:51, Reply)
Why couldn't Celine Dion afford any dolls?
Because she is porcelain (poor Celine)
(, Wed 9 May 2018, 8:50, Reply)
What did the giant with a speech impediment who wanted an internet access device implanted in his digit say
Wi Fi Fo' Fumb
(, Wed 9 May 2018, 4:21, Reply)
I have a grudging respect for people who do fly tipping.
They've got six legs, sticky feet, and they're a damned sight harder to sneak up on than cows.
(, Wed 9 May 2018, 2:40, Reply)
.
[email protected]: ~ $ ls
file.txt
[email protected]: ~ $ touch this
touch: cannot touch 'this': Permission denied
[email protected]: ~ $ sudo !!
[sudo] password for mc: **********
[email protected]: ~ $ ls
file.txt
this
(, Wed 9 May 2018, 0:27, 1 reply, 6 months ago)
I ordered a Hawaiian pizza today
There was no ham or pineapple on it and the cheese was about 1,200°C
(, Wed 9 May 2018, 0:24, Reply)
I got involved in a bust-up at a Buddhist meditation sangha
There was some serious Dharma drama.
(, Wed 9 May 2018, 0:18, 3 replies, latest was 6 months ago)
"Doctor, doctor...
The GUI on my Unix based system has crashed and it's left me with just a command line prompt. Is it serious?"

"I'm afraid it's Terminal."
(, Wed 9 May 2018, 0:17, 2 replies, latest was 6 months ago)

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