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We have a new game
its called bastard, the rules are simple, you may take three items to the checkout to give the worst possible impression of yourself.
e.g

1) Ski mask
2) Veet 500ml
3) What dog magazine

or

1) Lubricant
2) Stopwatch
3) Diary of Anne Frank....

Gentlemen.....we welcome your additions
(englishwineguy, Thu 31 Jul 2014, 2:15, archived)
prick

(I helped save b3ta! mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Thu 31 Jul 2014, 2:59, archived)
wanker

(I helped save b3ta! Zuowan, Thu 31 Jul 2014, 3:12, archived)
nonce

(I helped save b3ta! PooPants, Thu 31 Jul 2014, 3:50, archived)
you fucking cunt

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 31 Jul 2014, 6:18, archived)
baseball bat
swarfega
your mum
(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Thu 31 Jul 2014, 8:08, archived)
This went well.

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 31 Jul 2014, 9:05, archived)
haha lovely

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 31 Jul 2014, 9:10, archived)
bit sexist

(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Thu 31 Jul 2014, 9:24, archived)
Alright spastics how's it going? Anyone fingered a mod yet?
Alt: probably because I am a fucking idiot.
Alt alt: get fucked.
Alt alt alt: has the newsletter been killed yet?
Alt alt alt alt: off to lindos on Monday.
(I helped save b3ta! spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 21:10, archived)
piss off and enjoy your holiday you fucking idiot

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 21:11, archived)
kind and wise words from the massive bearded internet bully

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 21:21, archived)
i am all of those things and more

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 21:57, archived)
There's a good Southsea?

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 30 Jul 2014, 21:45, archived)
there are some nice pubs, a couple of decent restaurants, bits of the seafront are lovely
and ME, i'm good southsea
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 21:56, archived)
Then bad Southsea is my final answer.

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 30 Jul 2014, 22:10, archived)
I'm willing to bet that this is what we call a 'Mortal Wombat Holiday' or, in common parlance..
…'internet vacation'.
(I helped save b3ta! Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Thu 31 Jul 2014, 0:06, archived)
u ok babe?

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 21:13, archived)
I'm watching Sharknado
lol
(I helped save b3ta! djrich - Live from Houghton Regis got this thing for Clémence Poésy, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 21:27, archived)
Richard

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 21:36, archived)
McBeef?

(I helped save b3ta! spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 21:49, archived)
get fucked you black bastard

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 21:51, archived)
Bit harsh

(I helped save b3ta! spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 22:20, archived)
Edgy.

(I helped save b3ta! Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Thu 31 Jul 2014, 0:09, archived)
Big D

(I helped save b3ta! djrich - Live from Houghton Regis got this thing for Clémence Poésy, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 22:05, archived)
alright

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 22:18, archived)
Hey sorry no more free wi fi.
Get fucked
(I helped save b3ta! spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 22:23, archived)
fuck off, nonce

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 22:37, archived)
all good

(I helped save b3ta! djrich - Live from Houghton Regis got this thing for Clémence Poésy, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 22:30, archived)
^upset nonce^

(Plague Hedgehog 'posting crap', Wed 30 Jul 2014, 23:08, archived)
GeordieJay paedophiled a blind autistic kid

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 19:34, archived)
ok

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 19:38, archived)
It's this kind of witty banter that keeps you "Top of the Game" on here...

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 19:43, archived)
it could be worse, I could be a fat, bald, HIV+ northener wearing a vest and with a job as a 'team leader' in a ppi call centre

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 19:46, archived)
worse is subjective and also and abstract

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 19:47, archived)
hey, "watch' your mouth

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 19:48, archived)
srs is this what b3ta has become, qftw nobs trying to troll me, God speed

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 19:59, archived)
Bad times Mongy. when can we expect a 'live from the lake'?

(I helped save b3ta! Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:50, archived)
Good to have aspirations

(I helped save b3ta! Michael Ellis contributes nothing, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 19:50, archived)
He seems to be the best here Jaysum.

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 19:53, archived)
You're a stupid prick.

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 30 Jul 2014, 19:48, archived)
did you end up doing your sparky ticket?

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:13, archived)
Yeah mate,
Working as a PAT monkey for a big outfit for a bit now, doing proper sparky work when they need an extra hand to gain some experience. It's not ideal, but I knew I couldn't just bust on to site with a couple of c and guild tickets and start throwing cables around.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:16, archived)
go into building maintenance, it'll pay better than pat testing

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:19, archived)
I'll have a look,
I'm not doing too bad, as the by the test bonus can be pretty good if you don't spend your day smoking and drinking coffee. But thanks for the tip. I'm on the look to get out of this.

Are you up the juicer yet?
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:23, archived)
windy!
long time no see
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:34, archived)
Alright macho man manolith
How's the world turning on the south coast?
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:39, archived)
it's spinning like a good'n
bloody warm, mind

how're YOU?
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:45, archived)
Smashing thanks.
New job, 3rd dog, got engaged.


Although I'm stuck in Newport working this week and I'll be honest, it's not a happening town.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:51, archived)
congrats, congrats, congrats
don't they have boozers in newport?
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 21:11, archived)
I'm in one. It's a bit like Southsea.

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 30 Jul 2014, 21:17, archived)
good southsea or bad southsea?

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 21:18, archived)
Dozer is even more unpopular than Emvee.

(I helped save b3ta! Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:33, archived)
Don't be daft.
Although, I'm fairly sure they're both nullo
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:40, archived)
alright, WP

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:58, archived)
Alright shambles
How's it?
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 30 Jul 2014, 21:04, archived)
ace
I've just been to the seaside and the new au pair has arrived so I can hit the juicer without worrying about parenting and ting.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 21:22, archived)
Top work.

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 30 Jul 2014, 21:45, archived)
dude ... harsh

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:59, archived)
Evening.
What the fuck are you doing?
(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 18:46, archived)
Vodka, lime and tonic (as jeeves got tonic instead of soda), sitting in the sun writing away

(bumless The man with the hole in the middle, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 18:55, archived)
sitting in the beer garden of the juicer

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 18:55, archived)
I like a beer garden.
I might go to a beer garden. And not a poxy barrel-yard-turned-smoking-area either.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 19:31, archived)
Grass and things helps. And not astroturf.

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 19:38, archived)
drinking bleach

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 19:04, archived)
do not induce vomiting

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 19:11, archived)
I have never had much idea and as time passes I have ever less of an idea

(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 19:10, archived)
I found as you get older you care less, it evens out

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 19:12, archived)
how long to I have to wait for the care less bit mongy, ballpark will do

(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 19:12, archived)
11

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 19:17, archived)
\o/
hello grrrmachine
(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 19:18, archived)
hello whoever you are

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:30, archived)
:'-(

(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 21:48, archived)
Watching the last drops of moisture trickle out of my skin as I wither into a husk of my former self

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 19:17, archived)
I'm still working, nearly done now though.
THANKS FOR ASKING!!!

Might do a bit chicken stew later
(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 19:26, archived)
Yeah nice one
Fuck this weather, and fuck you. Alright? Alright.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 15:58, archived)
alt: alright.

(I helped save b3ta! MONO!, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 15:59, archived)
Alt?

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 16:10, archived)
ctrl?

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 16:35, archived)
Carol Thatcher's Rancid Labia?

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 16:52, archived)
no thanks, i'm having my tea soon

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 16:57, archived)
alright

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 16:03, archived)
sweet as

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 16:10, archived)
What's wrong with your weather?

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 16:29, archived)
Too hot
It doesn't need to be this hot
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 16:49, archived)
we'll be moaning in a couple month when it's too cold.
Goldilocks cunts.
(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 16:51, archived)
I won't
I much prefer the cold. Easier to get warm in winter than getting cool in summer.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 16:54, archived)
^ this.
Got up to 37 degrees in this office last summer. Good for growing chillies, though.
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Wed 30 Jul 2014, 17:20, archived)
Im watching you. If you moan ONCE about cold weather, I will END YOU.

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 17:22, archived)
nice here
I'm going to run out of rainwater for the veg in a day or two
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 16:36, archived)
If only there were another way of sourcing water

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 16:49, archived)
wha?

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 16:50, archived)
It's easy, listen
You know those bags of ice you can buy in Morrisons? Buy loads of those, put them in a bath and wait until they melt. EASY.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 16:53, archived)
wha?

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 18:06, archived)
I'm having to water everything twice a day in the greenhouse.
The rainwater ran out six weeks ago.
Terrible times. I'll have to start using piss.
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Wed 30 Jul 2014, 18:38, archived)
terrible gardening indignity
You need more water storage. Or better ventilation
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 19:32, archived)
Doors and windows open in the greenhouse.
Just need another tank. We're only here for a couple of months, though, so I'm not buying another tank for some other fucker to have when we've gone.
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Boris "...a desperate Buzzfeed imitation...", Wed 30 Jul 2014, 20:42, archived)
it's a bit warm, innit. fuck YOU though
alright
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 16:36, archived)
Dan, eat your snickers

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 16:50, archived)
why?

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 16:56, archived)
Because you turn into a right diva when you're hungry

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 16:59, archived)
har har har

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 17:10, archived)
corrupted by power

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 16:51, archived)
minimal power corrupts minimally

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 16:56, archived)
Afternoon all

(bumless The man with the hole in the middle, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 16:42, archived)

fternoon all +lt: MONO'S BUMHOLE
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 16:51, archived)
I just noticed that you can misspell Christopher Lee's character in Star Wars as 'Darth Tryanus', which I'm sure you'll agree is quite funny.

(I helped save b3ta! brb pussy in bio, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 17:34, archived)
alright
I'm enjoying the cool actually
(I helped save b3ta! Major Turd for tonight only, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 18:41, archived)
So we are all going to die from ebola.
Shall we start the B3ta enclave in the woods somewhere? Doveston can be mayor
(bumless The man with the hole in the middle, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 13:16, archived)
JMG is lifelong mayor of /talktown.

(I helped save b3ta! Zuowan, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 13:18, archived)
No.

(Lister of Smeg No talking. No smoking. Follow the orange line, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 14:03, archived)
^^^^

(I helped save b3ta! Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 14:35, archived)
*PISTOLS*

(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Wed 30 Jul 2014, 14:54, archived)
No and no
Next
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 13:19, archived)
remember 2unlimited?
i had their album on cassette
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 13:34, archived)
I do
That came out around the time I left school, imagine that!
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 13:43, archived)
i simply can't
however, try this for size. they are currently on tour!
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 13:48, archived)
Not a musical tour, obviously
Selling time shares or something, right?
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 13:52, archived)
no
www.2unlimitedlive.com/tour
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 13:58, archived)
well I've just 'liked' them on the Facebooks.

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 14:17, archived)
Im intrigued as to what the 'cobra method' involves
as I don't see how dancing around the place spitting everywhere is going to solve anything
(I helped save b3ta! Glovington, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 13:24, archived)
Unless you live in some third-world country, with poor healthcare facilities, and a limited understanding of infection control,
you're not going to die from Ebola.
If I were to be facing the prospect of living out the apocalypse in a survivalist enclave, I think I'd rather risk it with zombies, rather than throw my lot in with this sorry crowd.
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 13:30, archived)
would we be separated into tribes?
/talk, /board, /links, etc
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 13:32, archived)
I want to live alone in a cave, please
That's generally....nothing to do with b3ta
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 13:44, archived)
do you have a cave in mind or are you just thinking aloud?

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 14:08, archived)
I don't mind really
As long as it's really difficult for humans to get to
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 14:09, archived)
looks like spain is your best bet
www.rusticom.co.uk/spanish_properties/inland/rural/cave_houses.html
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 14:12, archived)
Yes!
This is now my favourite website. Thank you Manolith
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 14:18, archived)
oh my god this is amazing

(bumless The man with the hole in the middle, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 14:29, archived)
I was saving for a house boat, but fuck that now

(I helped save b3ta! Glovington, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 14:30, archived)
Why don't you get a floating cave boat?
Best of ALL worlds
(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 15:20, archived)
€25,000 for a "cave in ruins"?

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 18:27, archived)
we're all more likely to die from an influenza type affair

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 13:32, archived)
an affair?
oh mr sentimentals, i mustn't!
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 13:36, archived)
you cannot resist our love
you have great influenza over me...
(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 13:38, archived)
he's caught the love bug

(I helped save b3ta! Glovington, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 13:43, archived)
Chlamydia?

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 13:52, archived)
herbie?

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 13:58, archived)
Nah, I can't be doing with you spastics dragging me down, I'm just going to live in a wooden shack on my own.

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 14:30, archived)
I'll bring the beers

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 14:33, archived)
Leave them outside and piss off back to gaytown

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 14:38, archived)
I just like the music, that's all...

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 14:42, archived)
Just kidding, you can stay, but I'm in charge of the tunes

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 14:43, archived)
see thats the community spirit i like!

(bumless The man with the hole in the middle, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 14:45, archived)
oh ok, cool.

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 14:48, archived)
STAY ABOUT FROM MY CAVE

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 14:38, archived)
I'll bring the beers

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 14:42, archived)
I don't want a cave, I want something with a door so I can ignore it when people knock

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 14:44, archived)
Oh, my cave will have a door
like this
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 14:48, archived)
great, as a dwarf i can get in, cool, cool

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 15:07, archived)
Fuck THAT noise The LOVELY Bumless.
I'm going to be on my secret Nazi moonbase with all my Penguin Legion and Team Spiders.
(I helped save b3ta! stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Wed 30 Jul 2014, 15:14, archived)
Hey stuj
You're a good guy.
I'm bored at work.
Fancy paying for me to live so I can quit?
(I helped save b3ta! MONO!, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 15:33, archived)
Sorry The LOVELY MONO!. But no.
I'm afraid you'll just have to suffer.
(I helped save b3ta! stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Wed 30 Jul 2014, 15:34, archived)
in that case, I'll have to marry you

(I helped save b3ta! MONO!, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 15:36, archived)
As long as you're willing to have your bum painted gold, be incoherent and call me Arno, sure, why not?

(I helped save b3ta! stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Wed 30 Jul 2014, 15:42, archived)
^ ^
stupid hat
(I helped save b3ta! MONO!, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 15:51, archived)
Pahahaha
The client site manager has just told me about this great delivery he recieves, from PACT coffee. He can't understand why I can't stop laughing. I KNEW he was a nonce, all the paedo jokes he tells aren't funny, just uncomfortable, and now I know the truth.
(I helped save b3ta! Glovington, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 10:33, archived)
go on then, what's so upsetting about PACT?
I realise that b3ta is seemingly sponsored by it, but what's the issue with people having coffee?
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 10:34, archived)
Each bean is forced up the bum of an non consenting child. That's what I heard.

(I helped save b3ta! brb pussy in bio, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 10:51, archived)
nuttin but the truth

(I helped save b3ta! Glovington, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 11:28, archived)
I reckon this is all just some edgy, guerrilla marketing campaign.

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 10:51, archived)
I wish them the best
everyone has to make money somehow, as much as we don't want to, the idyll would be a society without money but that's ludicrous and I hate you for even trying to imagine it, FUCK, THIS ISN'T LOGAN'S FUCKING RUN.

Speaking of Logan's Run, how great is Box the robot? Fucking well great in't he.

"Overwhelming, am I not?" - Box, Logan's Run, 1976.
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 10:55, archived)
the voice of Box was the narrator of Babe
his name is "that one you think is James Earl Jones but isn't".
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 11:42, archived)
i will think you will find that Babe was a documentary, the only reason we could hear the pig talking to the other animals was because of special recording equipment

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 11:57, archived)
^fact

(I helped save b3ta! Glovington, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 12:00, archived)
Babe pig in the city
was a poignant telling of the injustice of a minority species trying to make it in a big bad world.
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 12:01, archived)
Both Babe and Box absolutely loved
"Fish, and plankton. And sea greens, and protein from the sea."
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 12:00, archived)
I love the bit where Babe freezes the sheep and then by some not really explained phenomenon the whole farm falls down.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 12:32, archived)
I liked that Babe was able to just make said weapons appear from thin air.

(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 13:43, archived)
I heard they shot a man in Reno, just to watch him die.

(I helped save b3ta! Zuowan, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 12:49, archived)
i've thought about this.
and i've come to the conclusion that you beakering on and on bores me. hope this helps.
(I helped save b3ta! janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 11:10, archived)
that is such a shame
you can always use the ignore button, I won't mind
(I helped save b3ta! Glovington, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 11:26, archived)
also, is this grounds for our divorce, and who gets to keep two hats?
I remember it like it was yesterday
(I helped save b3ta! Glovington, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 11:37, archived)
I don't

(I helped save b3ta! MONO!, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 11:44, archived)
she's so fickle

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 11:46, archived)
I'll get over it
:(
(I helped save b3ta! Glovington, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 11:58, archived)
Woah
I have no memory of that
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 12:10, archived)
just like the geri/duggan thing for me!
i think we're slowly having our minds erased
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 12:22, archived)
You might be right
You know what I don't get? Why do the people on /links and /qotw say that they hate everything, and why does it upset them so much that other people like these things? What tv shows/movies/books do they like? I don't get it.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 12:29, archived)
I'm starting to think that this site is full of witless dullards with nothing valuable or interesting to say

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 12:39, archived)
i always thought that was the point of this place.

(I helped save b3ta! MONO!, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 12:55, archived)
^ cutting edge wit

(I helped save b3ta! Glovington, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 13:13, archived)
pricks

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 9:52, archived)
Pricks and Prones May Break My Bones
But Words Will Never Jon Pertwee
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 9:55, archived)
It's a bit chilly in here.
/ac
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 10:01, archived)
wankers

(I helped save b3ta! Glovington, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 10:03, archived)

★★CLICK★THE★↑↓LIKE★WORD↑↓★★★★★★★★
░█░░░█░█░▄▀░█▀▀░░░░▀█▀░█░█░█░▄▀▀░
░█░░░█░█▀░░░█▀░░▄▄░░█░░█▀█░█░░▀▄
░█▄▄░█░█░▀▄░█▄▄░░░░░█░░█░█░█░▄▄▀░
★★CLICK★THE★↑↓LIKE★WORD↑↓★★★★★★★★
(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 10:05, archived)
Either my phone mucks up the spacing on all attempts at ASCII art,
or you're a fucking idiot.
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 10:14, archived)
Both.

(I helped save b3ta! MONO!, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 10:15, archived)
your phone hates you

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 10:26, archived)
Hey, my phone is like Roger Murtagh.
It's permanently 2 days from retirement and, though it may find me exasperating, it's actually very fond of me.
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 10:49, archived)
morning

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 8:06, archived)
Sup

(I helped save b3ta! MONO!, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 8:17, archived)
yo

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 8:28, archived)
word up g

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 8:20, archived)
sup

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 8:28, archived)
yo

(I helped save b3ta! Michael Ellis contributes nothing, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 8:24, archived)
word up g

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 8:29, archived)
'sup Bae

(I helped save b3ta! Michael Ellis contributes nothing, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 8:32, archived)
a fine observation shambles

(I helped save b3ta! Glovington, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 8:35, archived)
morning

(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 8:35, archived)
you knows it

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 8:37, archived)
safe as fuck

(I helped save b3ta! Glovington, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 8:43, archived)
your mother has a penis

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 9:20, archived)
19, 9 , 19, 9 ,1983

(I helped save b3ta! Glovington, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 9:26, archived)
Hello.
I watched 21 Jump Street, last night, which appeared to be the hilarious tale of two closeted homosexuals attempting to commit statutory rape.
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 8:39, archived)
That does sound pretty hilarious

(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 8:41, archived)
I hope one was chubby and they other muscular as if
one was to receive and another to give it.
(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 8:48, archived)
I think its sylvester stallone and danny devito

(I helped save b3ta! Glovington, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 8:52, archived)
Channing Tatum is sooooo dreamy,
if your fantasy is for a dead-eyed man-child with a stupid name.
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 9:31, archived)
How?

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 9:05, archived)
god done it

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 9:07, archived)
Which one?
Fingers crossed that it was the giant dung beetle.
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 9:18, archived)
that would explain a lot

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 9:20, archived)
TAKE THAT, SCIENCE!

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 9:35, archived)
nah

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 9:36, archived)
oh, ok

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 9:47, archived)
do you do?

(I helped save b3ta! MONO!, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 9:20, archived)
what you do to me?

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 9:20, archived)
I wish I knew?

(I helped save b3ta! MONO!, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 9:23, archived)
hope this finds you well?

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 9:34, archived)
go fuck yoursen

(I helped save b3ta! MONO!, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 9:37, archived)
can do!

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 9:40, archived)
most notably

(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 9:21, archived)
bit chilly today, stupid sunshine

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 9:24, archived)
This office has it's windows shut,
it should have them open.
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 9:26, archived)
open one them
i bet in 40 mins you'll receive a group email telling employees not to open the window because they have air con installed and it will render it useless.

They will not blame you directly because the person sending the email can't be arsed to walk over to you.
(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 9:33, archived)
we don't have AC, so it's ok.

(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 9:48, archived)
baked.

(bumless The man with the hole in the middle, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 23:55, archived)
edit: goodnight
ps the first rule of bag club is you don't talk about bag club
(bumless The man with the hole in the middle, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 23:56, archived)
best Bouise song ever

(Plague Hedgehog 'posting crap', Tue 29 Jul 2014, 23:56, archived)
phone hacking
www.b3ta.com/board/11092108
(herman:D, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 0:00, archived)
That's /board in 2014, ladies and gentlemen!
Give it a big hand.
(Plague Hedgehog 'posting crap', Wed 30 Jul 2014, 0:03, archived)
;D
www.b3ta.com/board/11092113
(herman:D, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 0:11, archived)
wanker

(I helped save b3ta! Michael Ellis contributes nothing, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 8:24, archived)
this is why we dont have nice things to play with

(I helped save b3ta! PooPants, Wed 30 Jul 2014, 0:55, archived)
but my mum has just lesbo'd with your mum and they're both a bit tired so.....maybe tomorrow?

(I helped save b3ta! PooPants, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 23:31, archived)
I'm glad that prick Spanishfly has fucked off for a while

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 18:47, archived)
I'm glad he's dead.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 18:51, archived)
future plane shooting down?

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 18:52, archived)
Is it because he's a fucking idiot?

(I helped save b3ta! Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 18:59, archived)
That last thread had nothing going for it at all.
This one isn't much better.

Let's all hope for a really good next thread.
(I helped save b3ta! brb pussy in bio, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 19:05, archived)
Hopefully he will be going to a place where Ebola is about to go viral.

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 19:14, archived)
poor sods, first ebola and now that fucking idiot is about to show up

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 19:16, archived)
it's the kids I feel sorry for

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 19:43, archived)
<s>sorry for</s>

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 19:51, archived)
I hope he drowns.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 21:26, archived)
I bet he stuck some peanuts up his bum on the flight

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 22:18, archived)
poor snoopy

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 22:48, archived)
I just found out that someone I know is a sex pest.
Loads of people had been saying for years that he was a sex pest, and now it turns out that he is a sex pest.

Imagine if that sort of thing happened on the internet.
(Plague Hedgehog 'posting crap', Tue 29 Jul 2014, 22:53, archived)
in what way is he a sex pest?

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 23:07, archived)
He routinely cultivated inappropriate relationships
with impressionable young people he had influence over.

Basically, exactly like SpanishFly but marginally less creepy.
(Plague Hedgehog 'posting crap', Tue 29 Jul 2014, 23:49, archived)
Alright
I am drinking lager in the VIP lounge of Manchester airport. Not really but I am drinking beer at the airport I am not that much of a cunt to use the VIP lounge
(I helped save b3ta! spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 17:01, archived)
bit late for a beer at an airport, you should be on shots by this point, them the rules of airport bars

(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 17:04, archived)
Why are you at an airport? Are you going somewhere?

(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 17:05, archived)
Thailand

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 17:13, archived)
yeah because the £17.99 to use the lounge which includes a meal and free drinks is for cunts, you're a fucking idiot

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 17:19, archived)
Probably because you're a fucking idiot.

(I helped save b3ta! MONO!, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 17:19, archived)
You are supposed to be taking the mushrooms now
they'll kick in as you take off, what happened to that much better and more entertaining plan?
(I helped save b3ta! Glovington, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 17:36, archived)
My mate once munched a pile of mushrooms en route to a party here
and then topped them off with a couple of pills. He did this while driving a car because he was "running a bit late" and is a fucking idiot. Then he got stuck in traffic. We had to send a taxi to the roundabout where the M1 and A14 meet to pick the dozy cunt up. In retrospect, we should just have left him to wander into traffic.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 17:39, archived)
Sorry to hear they wouldn't let you in the VIP lounge, it's pretty nice in there

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 17:43, archived)
he was probably put off by the fact they don't allow children in them

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 17:48, archived)
These sound like the acts of a stupid fucking idiot

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 17:54, archived)
Buy a pint and drink it near the VIP area
Hey Presto! You get to schmooze with the rich and famous without the cost.
(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 18:08, archived)
See you guys. Boarding now

(I helped save b3ta! spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 18:30, archived)
Fucking idiot

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 23:59, archived)
Hi honey! I'm home!

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 16:27, archived)
*drops monocle*

(I helped save b3ta! MONO!, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 16:28, archived)
*plays penis keepie uppie with it*

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 16:29, archived)
quite the spectacle

(I helped save b3ta! Glovington, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 16:30, archived)
*canned laughter*

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 16:30, archived)
For a while I was deeply in love with this breadstick
but then it fractured, split, went a bit stale. Now I can't even use it to dip into sauces and extricate the sauces seperately.

I HAVE A SOGGY TIP BREADSTICK.
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 16:32, archived)
The world is treating you ba-a-a-a-ad, misery!

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 16:53, archived)
Sorrow seems to be the hardest world.

(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 17:01, archived)
Possibly the ejected diamond core of a gas giant following some sort of planetary collision?

(I helped save b3ta! brb pussy in bio, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 17:57, archived)
Shambo
alright
(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 17:06, archived)
I don't love your any more,
so I'm taking the kids and moving back in with my mother.
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 17:31, archived)
Fat chance.
Your mother is running away to Rio with me.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 17:36, archived)
alright
Alt: Alright?
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 14:59, archived)
alright two hats

(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:00, archived)
alright captain crackerjack

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:05, archived)
none of your business, nosey parker!
alt: alright
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:06, archived)
bit racist

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:11, archived)
typical honky

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:14, archived)
HONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONK
HONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONK
HONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONK
HONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONK
HONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONK
HONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONK
HONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONK
HONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONKHONK
(I helped save b3ta! MONO!, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:17, archived)
goose quest, goose quest. where will it, take me next? HONK

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:20, archived)
Honk

(I helped save b3ta! MONO!, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:52, archived)
heeey

(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 17:02, archived)
That's OUR word
cracker
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:26, archived)
you can't, like, OWN a word, man

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:35, archived)
^WRONG

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:39, archived)
you'd own the word 'bumhead'
because you are one!
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:45, archived)
Be that as it may
Think of the royalties!
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:46, archived)
OK, I'm thinking of the royalties
What next?
(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:54, archived)
think of the children

(I helped save b3ta! MONO!, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:56, archived)
think of a number

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 16:00, archived)
80

(I helped save b3ta! Glovington, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 16:02, archived)
Now double it

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 16:03, archived)
10

(I helped save b3ta! MONO!, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 16:07, archived)
I'm still thinking of the children
Those poor, fingered children. Also: dogs
(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 16:07, archived)
dog fingering children?
a new generation of modlings
(I helped save b3ta! Glovington, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 16:08, archived)
Dog-fingering Children Of The Corn

(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 16:09, archived)
+ 2: The Klumps

(I helped save b3ta! MONO!, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 16:11, archived)
Get this: Eddie Murphy plays all the children, the sheriff, the local hooker AND the dog that gets fingered telepathically by fifty kids
I smell an Oscar
(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 16:14, archived)
yer

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:06, archived)
yeah yeah yeah sweet sweet

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:14, archived)
no

(I helped save b3ta! MONO!, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:11, archived)
Oh no!

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:12, archived)
I could really do a shit right now.

(I helped save b3ta! MONO!, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:16, archived)
Way ahead of you there, buddy

(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:27, archived)
I'm not *three* bad lol

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:15, archived)
I don't get it

(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:15, archived)
probably because you're a fucking idiot

(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:18, archived)
Haha
You know me, like a dog's back leg...up and down!
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:25, archived)
Beats being...
....half left!!!
(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:27, archived)
Oh, heavens!

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:32, archived)
yeah
alt: ha, yes!
(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:17, archived)
Swell!

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:26, archived)
bit personal isn't it

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:32, archived)
Not as personal as something I just thought of

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:36, archived)
Was it a robotic anus?

(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:39, archived)
Nope
You'll never guess it. Not in a million years.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:45, archived)
is it that picture of you in the bath?
again
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:47, archived)
I just want to be painted like your french girls :(

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:52, archived)
you've got to stop sending it to people, you know that

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 16:11, archived)
I'm proud of my body, thank you very much
It deserves to be shown
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 16:14, archived)
there's a 'hot' 'new' 'app' doing the rounds at the mo called 'french girls'
people submit a selfie then others get the chance to draw it. it's produced some pretty funny stuff: frenchgirlsapp.tumblr.com/
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 16:20, archived)
Is it a robotic vagina?

(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:52, archived)
It's not robotic

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:53, archived)
is it a bionic vagina?

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:59, archived)
Domine, labia mea aperies

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 16:02, archived)
is it a septic vagina?

(I helped save b3ta! Glovington, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 16:02, archived)
is it a foetid vagina?

(I helped save b3ta! MONO!, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 16:07, archived)
...and I'm done

(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 16:08, archived)
yeah, and what?

(I helped save b3ta! Glovington, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:42, archived)
Just asking
You know, being polite and that
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:46, archived)
oh, ok
thanks babez.x
(I helped save b3ta! Glovington, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:59, archived)
Lunch thread
Is this still done? I'm having mackerel fillets. Possibly in the garden.
(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:08, archived)
a terrible lunch of leftover festival food for me

(I helped save b3ta! Glovington, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:11, archived)
Tell me more
What does festival food consist of?
(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:17, archived)
pricks

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:21, archived)
a tin of pear halves, an instant porridge pot, 8 boxes of raisins, and a bag of crushed crisps

(I helped save b3ta! Glovington, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:23, archived)
That really is terrible
Like someone from a council estate might eat for lunch.

I saw a heavily pregnant woman devour an entire multipack of Toffee Crisps on the train yesterday. When she got off she asked her gentleman friend if they had 'all the kids' with them.

/snobbery
(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:33, archived)
I know its awful, but to be honest, my walnut sized stomach will probably only take a couple of boxes of raisins anyway

(I helped save b3ta! Glovington, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:36, archived)
you should of said something, in my experience questioning a heavily pregnant womens chocolate intake can lead to a lively discussion

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:45, archived)
I was a northerner on a train pulling into Reading and already felt like I was on for a beating if I opened my mouth

(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:48, archived)
something cheap from the spar

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:13, archived)
From their hot counter?
I always think of that as being a breeding ground for the most horrendous types of germs
(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:17, archived)
nah, probably just a ginsters or something

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:21, archived)
wouldn't do that, my friend bit into a gingsters once and it was full of pubes
he sent it back and they repayed him with a box of gingsters pasties, as if he'd ever eat another one.
(I helped save b3ta! Glovington, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:25, archived)
When you say full of pubes do you mean it had pubes in it or that the filling was entirely pubes like a dirty cushion?

(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:34, archived)
I mean approximately a quarter of it was full of pubes
the first bite. I think a disgruntled employee must have thought it was funny to have a trim and shove the offcuts in there.
(I helped save b3ta! Glovington, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:37, archived)
That is fairly funny, as long as it happens to someone else

(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:45, archived)
agreed

(I helped save b3ta! Glovington, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:47, archived)
Do you reckon they were front pubes or back pubes?

(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:53, archived)
front for sure, no winnits or nout

(I helped save b3ta! Glovington, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 13:03, archived)
Bonus

(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 13:10, archived)
Maybe it was meant to be full of pubes
Did he read the packet before he bought it?
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:42, archived)
may contain traces of nuts

(I helped save b3ta! Glovington, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:48, archived)
Jolly good show.

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:53, archived)
What, YOUR MUM?
lol
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:43, archived)
hey, now
was that really necessary?
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 13:24, archived)
Depends
Is a chair 'necessary'? Are clothes 'necessary'?
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 13:30, archived)
if not for them, I'd be naked on the floor right now

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 13:32, archived)
Which would be fine, right? Wouldn't kill you, would it?
BAN CHAIRS AND CLOTHES!
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 13:34, archived)
i'll get carpet burn :(

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 13:43, archived)
ban carpet

(I helped save b3ta! Glovington, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 13:50, archived)
ban everything until we're all just floating naked in a vacuum

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 13:53, archived)
*votes*

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 14:06, archived)
if we ban everything we will have to ban floating and vacuums too, which would leave us with dirty carpets,
but seeing as they're banned too it should be ok, ban everything with the exception of nothing, we can just have nothing.
(I helped save b3ta! Glovington, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 14:07, archived)
A carpet ban?

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 14:03, archived)
yes, no pets to be allowed in cars any more, if people can't be bothered to walk them places, they shouldnt own them

(I helped save b3ta! Glovington, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 14:05, archived)
Hey manolith, how come rob's personal website is for online reputation consultants? Does he seriously expect people to take reputation advice from a ginger kid-fingerer?
www.b3ta.com/features/faq/#who
(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 14:34, archived)
how the fuck should i know?

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 14:41, archived)
You're a mod, you should know stuff like that

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 14:45, archived)
what did piers morgan have for breakfast?
you're a cunt, you should know stuff like that
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:05, archived)
I had a cheap tescos energy drink and a spoon of peanut butter

(bumless The man with the hole in the middle, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:32, archived)
Are you in training? For a marathon?

(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:34, archived)
marathon wank possibly

(bumless The man with the hole in the middle, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:41, archived)
when do you start your new promising career?

(I helped save b3ta! Glovington, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:42, archived)
Just finishing all the paper work up, hopefully end of this week or beginning or next.

(bumless The man with the hole in the middle, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 13:52, archived)
how much paperwork is really involved in fluffing though?

(I helped save b3ta! Glovington, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 14:10, archived)
About three sheets of double-ply first thing in the morning, petering out to half a sheet last thing at night

(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 14:41, archived)
I'm well hungry, so I've eaten loads

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:41, archived)
Loads of what? I don't just want quantities, I want details of foodstuffs

(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:45, archived)
3 x egg & cress sandwiches
Loads of strawberries, grapes and blueberries.
1 x Pink Lady apple
1 x packet of salt & shake
1 x toffee crisp
2 x fresh cream doughnut things
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:48, archived)
Ooh, I've just found a pear

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:51, archived)
Fucking hell, how can you eat that much? Do you shit like an elephant?
At least you're getting your five a day in amongst all that gluttony
(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:53, archived)
The simple fact is this; people don't know how to eat
I eat properly.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:53, archived)
And while I don't shit over-frequently
When I do, I make it count, god damn it.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:54, archived)
That genuinely made me do a lol

(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:54, archived)
You should see me at the all-you-can-eat chinese place
It's quite the spectacle
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:56, archived)
"No, it's eat as much you like. There's no competitive element implied."
"At £3.99 I think I know who's winning."
(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:59, archived)
hey, let's go to an all you can eat chinese place

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 13:30, archived)
Water Margin's lunchtime offer is very competitive

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 13:31, archived)
Is that the one in Derby?
I can't imagine there's more than one Chinese restaurant called The Water Margin
(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 13:40, archived)
It's on the Derby/Portsmouth border

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 13:41, archived)
do they do the full range at lunchtime though, that's the question

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 13:42, archived)
No, they don't
But there's still plenty to choose from.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 14:03, archived)
well they can GET FUCKED then
nah, not really. let's get some chinese
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 14:04, archived)
Yay!
You should see little Lou eat in there. Holy shit...it's unreal.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 14:08, archived)
wait, are we talking about lou from neighbours or captain lou albano?

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 14:42, archived)
the latter
Swing your arms from side to side
it's time to go do the Mario!
Take one step, and then you know
Do the Mario, Here we go again!
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 14:46, archived)
lyrical GOLD

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 15:05, archived)
*places bread carefully in individual palms*
*stamps heavily on a mixture of crisps, cheese and onions with erratic leg jivery*
*rotates arm catching some pieces of the food kicked up by aforementioned legjivery*

ENVOLVE ENVOLVE ENVOLVE!
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:43, archived)
Now THIS is a lunch

(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:45, archived)
Crisp sandwiches are ok with me.

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:48, archived)
YES!

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 14:04, archived)
Pastrami sandwich, basics yogurt, pop chips.
As thrilling as ever. I also had a pre-lunch biscuit.
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 12:59, archived)
Pastrami is definitely something I can get behind

(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 13:01, archived)
I'm still hungry.
Might buy some peanuts, or something.
Everyone loves a food thread.
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 13:18, archived)
I love peanuts

(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 13:40, archived)
I ended up with coated peanuts, which are ok, I suppose.
Slightly regretting not just buying the massive bag of salted ones, though.
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 14:15, archived)
Caveat emptor
I always regret the coated ones
(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 14:42, archived)
I'm going to beat up the other kids in my office and steal their money and eat like a king at lunch

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 13:11, archived)
What, at a massive table with an ermine cloak around your shoulders, a crown on your head and a sceptre in your hand?

(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 13:14, archived)
why not

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 13:15, archived)
sweet

(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 13:16, archived)


or this?
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 13:37, archived)
walkers are doing their annual zany public-suggestion flavours
yesterday i had pulled pork which just tasted like watered-down barbecue sauce
today i had steak fajita, they were alright but not as nice as regular beef crisps, ergo pointless
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 13:29, archived)
It's difficult coming up with a genuinely original variety
that isn't just stupid or disgusting. I think all the proper flavours have been done.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 13:35, archived)
Agreed
Also crisps should be crisp flavours. If I want pulled pork I'll eat pulled pork.
(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 13:39, archived)
Do you they do something with chorizo?
Chorizo crisps would be alright
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 13:43, archived)
Tesco do one but it just tastes of crisps

(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 13:52, archived)
Crisp flavour
Now why hasn't anyone thought of that?
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 14:09, archived)
Some kind of cunt who thinks that 'Restaurant' is a good name for a restaurant will probably invent it

(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 14:47, archived)
this year's token 'animal' flavour is ranch raccoon

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 13:42, archived)
Of course it is
Drax and Onion
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 14:05, archived)
Cheese & Ronan for me, please.

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 14:23, archived)
I liked it when they did footballer flavoured crisps, like salt and linekar and cheese and owen and david's semen

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 14:13, archived)
Now, one of those isn't real, is it

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 14:17, archived)
morning
Alt: alright
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 6:50, archived)
that dirty vet in the Dream Theater shirt lives down the road from me.
fortunately i sold my dog to Rob for fingering.
(I helped save b3ta! janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 7:11, archived)
Rick Witter lives just up the road from me.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 7:12, archived)
off of shed 7?

(I helped save b3ta! janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 7:14, archived)
the very same

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 7:48, archived)
and by that i mean that the dog was for fingering.
not that fingering was payment for the dog.
(I helped save b3ta! janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 7:15, archived)
These dogs were made for fingering
and that's just what they'll do!
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 10:45, archived)
What's the largest dog that you reckon someone could put one finger in its bumhole and one in its mouth and then touch their fingers together?

(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 10:52, archived)
Are we trying to keep the dog alive, or is it ok if it dies?

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 11:01, archived)
I don't care, I'm a man of science

(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 11:02, archived)
Ok, then I'm going with beagle

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 11:47, archived)
*makes notes in notebook* Beagle, thanks

(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 11:48, archived)

b3ta.com/talk/5822600
(I helped save b3ta! Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 9:21, archived)
Fortunate for you or the dog?
Either way it's getting its bumhole filled
(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 10:50, archived)
Morning dozer
Busy morning for me just before I head off to the airport
(I helped save b3ta! spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 8:19, archived)
Why, are you off somewhere?

(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 10:49, archived)
fucking idiot convention, probably

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 10:51, archived)
Probably because he's a fucking idiot?
Alright manolith
(I helped save b3ta! CaptainCrackerjack live trout, slow motion, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 11:01, archived)
alright ccj

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 11:08, archived)
wanker

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 8:23, archived)
fuck off dozers

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 8:39, archived)
morning

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 8:34, archived)
no, just having a shit!

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 8:40, archived)
haha! like the joke!

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 8:43, archived)
it's really rather laugh out loud

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 8:47, archived)
I once read about a man who rolled on the floor and then actually laughed his own bottom off

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 8:55, archived)
that was me

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 8:57, archived)
I thought you were a girl?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 8:58, archived)
how vaguely ironic

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 9:04, archived)
sort of like having lots of a particular utensil, but actually needing a slightly different one

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 9:15, archived)
precisely

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 9:16, archived)
isn't it

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 9:23, archived)
i'm going to make a cup of tea and have a think about it

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 9:39, archived)
do you want to borrow a knife?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 9:48, archived)
i see what you've done there
/ac
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 10:09, archived)
Alright
Alt: morning
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 8:34, archived)
The man with the double headwear!

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 8:41, archived)
Multi-millinery!
*double doffs*
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 8:44, archived)
Dovingston D

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 8:40, archived)
Drimbo

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 8:41, archived)
mornright

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 8:51, archived)
BUM!
haha, bum
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 9:49, archived)

www.crapgraffiti.com/wp-1364185719.jpg
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 9:57, archived)
good point

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 10:09, archived)
Is it, though?

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 9:07, archived)
morning is an abstract concept

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 9:15, archived)
Abstraction might be an abstract concept,
but I don't feel qualified to judge.
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 9:17, archived)
It's a good day for a shit

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 9:16, archived)
Listen to your heart scouse

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 9:21, archived)
my heart says yes
but my rectum says maybe :(
(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 9:27, archived)
let it come, don't push too hard

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 9:31, archived)
I hope it goes
boom boody-boom boody-boom boody-boom
Boody-boom boody-boom boody-boom-boom-boo
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 9:31, archived)
I'll compile a comprehensive audio report later

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 9:34, archived)
*comedy racist accent*

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 9:34, archived)
Sofia Loren was only pretending to be Italian?

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 9:48, archived)
She was a fucking liar, through and through

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 9:53, archived)
As we say in my home country,
birdie num num.
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 10:12, archived)
^ apathetic Klingon

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 9:24, archived)
I think I'd be upset if I had to share my morning commute with a dozen herons.

(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 10:24, archived)
so would your pots and pans

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 10:33, archived)
I think it would be worse if I had to share a bus with a few Dale Winton and Gino D'acampo clones

(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 10:40, archived)

worse
sexy
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 10:46, archived)
+ Louis Spence

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 11:49, archived)
i would also be upset if you had to do that

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 10:46, archived)
Morning dozer

(I helped save b3ta! Major Turd for tonight only, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 10:46, archived)
morning

(I helped save b3ta! mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Mon 28 Jul 2014, 23:01, archived)
Alright.

(I helped save b3ta! Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Mon 28 Jul 2014, 23:07, archived)
not bad, you?

(I helped save b3ta! mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Mon 28 Jul 2014, 23:09, archived)
Yer.

(I helped save b3ta! Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Mon 28 Jul 2014, 23:10, archived)
JMG.

(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 28 Jul 2014, 23:13, archived)
JMG!
no fat chicks
(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Mon 28 Jul 2014, 23:18, archived)
No fat chicks indeed.
Let's be tight on this rule.
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 28 Jul 2014, 23:19, archived)
Let's remind ourselves of the time when the sex offenders on here were spread evenly across the site...
..and not just QFTW and /board.

b3ta.com/talk/6942247
(I helped save b3ta! Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 0:16, archived)
The internet just got considerably slimmer and less sweaty.

(I helped save b3ta! Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Mon 28 Jul 2014, 23:29, archived)
Thankfully Diabetes has taken hold of what I've been too busy to do round here.

(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 28 Jul 2014, 23:32, archived)
they are all on fatbook posting pictures of their dinners :(

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Mon 28 Jul 2014, 23:36, archived)
Gonz should write them a diet plan.
They'd all shit themselves thin.
(I helped save b3ta! Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Mon 28 Jul 2014, 23:46, archived)
alright amorous badger

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 28 Jul 2014, 23:11, archived)

b3ta.com/talk/7751326
(I helped save b3ta! Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Mon 28 Jul 2014, 23:29, archived)
alright

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 28 Jul 2014, 23:11, archived)
prick

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Mon 28 Jul 2014, 23:18, archived)
I like the cut of your jib.

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 28 Jul 2014, 23:28, archived)
I quite need a poo

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword w⚓, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 1:49, archived)
popular page this ^

(I helped save b3ta! brb pussy in bio, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 2:58, archived)

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