Fuck it, how do you conform to your regional stereotype/
Im from Yorkshire, now live in the NW, and pretty much comply with both. Yorkshire Pud, and Black Pud, fucking ace.
This is a food thread btw, if you want an alt, then suggest one, and you'll be rated out of 10. Prize for the best one.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Fri 10 Aug 2012, 16:11, 143 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

What's the worst thing you've ever got away with at work?
Alt: I'm not a fan of doughnuts, but if you had to have one what type would you choose?

Altalt: When was the last time you went 'commando'?
( Reginald Donkeyfuck, Fri 10 Aug 2012, 14:35, 143 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

"ted"
i'm going to see "ted" and then have dinner tonight. it's the film by the "family guy" dudes. can films of tv shows ever work? i am thinking "the simpsons" says probably not.

alt: what inanimate object would you want to come to life? what could it tell us if it did?

altalt: lunch, of course??
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 10 Aug 2012, 12:27, 210 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Fucking hell I'll do it then
Weekend plans everyone?

I'm dirt poor for the rest of the month, top money saving tips please.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 10 Aug 2012, 11:07, 90 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Good morning all
So it's a sunny day, it's a friday, I have already recieved a text from a member of staff saying that they will not be in today & would I kindly look after X-Y & Z for them, I know it's an excuse to have an early weekend, so excuses you have used, what, where, why and how?
www.guardian.co.uk/uk/2012/aug/09/couple-falsely-claim-child-missing

Alt:Say something nice, I dare you.
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 10 Aug 2012, 7:15, 170 replies, latest was 7 years ago)

There are some right fucking mentalists on BBC2.
Tune in, or watch in catch up.

Who is the weirdest person you've ever worked with/known?

Alt: Pub Trivia.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 9 Aug 2012, 21:50, 71 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

evening evening evening!
Persieds at the weekend. What will you wish on a shooting star? Don't care whether you believe in it or not, everyone wishes for something.
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 9 Aug 2012, 18:58, 81 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

it's like a dodo on here today
what substance could you never give up?

alt: if you were going to get (another) tattoo, what would you get??

altalt: who is the biggest cunt you've ever met?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 9 Aug 2012, 16:31, 37 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Now there's a mod about
we should have a whinge thread.

What's wrong with b3ta?

Offtopic bugs I've noticed: Popular page goes screwy every few days, and if you edit a thread the reply counter removes all sub replies.

Not that I care that much mind.
Edit: FUCK YEAH BOXING GOLD (also proving the reply bug)
(PsychoChomp, Thu 9 Aug 2012, 16:20, 21 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Best/Worst things about summer
What were your summer holidays like as a child? Good or bad? What about now? Are you a summer or a winter person?

Alt:
Silliest thing you've done this week
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 9 Aug 2012, 14:50, 132 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Er, stuff
What's best for lunch? Last night leftovers or something shop-bought?

Alt: Which sequel-less film do you think is most in in need of a sequel?

Altalt: Have you/will you ever stop masturbating?
(Captain Give-A-Fuck #internetpals4eva, Thu 9 Aug 2012, 13:09, 131 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Lets all fix the popular page by being all VERY WITTY.
Choose your own subject.
(PsychoChomp, Thu 9 Aug 2012, 12:29, 140 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

So it turns out those kittehs aren't so fluffy after all...
www.theregister.co.uk/2012/08/09/kittycam_discovers_killer_cats/

Have you ever had a pet that turned out to be a killer/wolf in sheep's clothing/utter bastard?

alt: have you ever met anyone who you thought was cute but then turned out to be a killer/utter bastard?

altalt: lunch
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 9 Aug 2012, 11:15, 92 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

I swear to God, when I leave this place I am going to punch somebody.
He's one of those passive-aggressive pricks that is all nice to you to your face and then talks about you behind your back. My only comfort is that everybody around here knows he's likes this and dislikes him intensely for it.

Is there anybody at your job that your fists itch around?

Alt: Or make it happy! Is there anybody at your work that you'd really miss if you left?
( Kroney, Thu 9 Aug 2012, 11:13, 26 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

alright fluffers and queers?
Monty challenged me to start a thread less bent than Bobby's atrocity exhibition down there.

So, turquoise. This season's colour or what?

Alt- who would you rather go boozing with, Piers Morgan or Robert Kilroy-Silk?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 9 Aug 2012, 11:12, 3 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Which Olympians do you fancy? Must say that Trott girl is cute but Dampney, the beach volleyball girl is FIT.
Alt: what can monty do in the future to avoid such schoolboy errors as losing ones wallet?

Alt x2 why has dozer gone all bent?
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 9 Aug 2012, 9:59, 161 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

I lost my wallet last night whilst running for a bus.
This is a major, major disaster for me and I am most upset about it.

What was your last screw-up, was it your fault and do you deserve sympathy or derision?

Alt: What was the last thing you did of which you are extremely proud?

'LOL my mum!!!!!!' to spare you geniuses the bother.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 9 Aug 2012, 8:09, 211 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Let me tell you that I saw a small child wearing a Roxy Music t shirt today.
Is this a well deserved nod towards the innovative brilliance of Manzanera, MacKay, Eno and Ferry or some other misguided fashion statement?

Alternatively, entertain me because I just come here sometimes but I'm very (special) needy.
( The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Wed 8 Aug 2012, 18:47, 212 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Ok, so you fatties struggled with yesterday's suggestion of fasting for a couple of days a week.
There are various campaigns out there encouraging people to go vegetarian for one day a week*.
Could any of you militant omnivores cope without consuming flesh for a day, or longer?
What would you eat?

Alt: What is it that you find so attractive about my mum? She really isn't interested in sleeping with any of you. The woman is nearly 70 for Christ's sake.

*Not from me, I don't care what you eat.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 8 Aug 2012, 15:37, 175 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

What do you suggest for the Paralympics?
Tasteless suggestions please. I suggested dwarf throwing, semi -seriously, you'd have thought I'd shit in a font the looks i got.
Alt, still on a sporting theme, did you enjoy games/gym/sport at school? Politicos are whining on about it suddenly being important again, because we've won some medals. Agree or disagree?
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Wed 8 Aug 2012, 13:43, 129 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

calm it, lads. I ain't banned
They'd never ban me
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Wed 8 Aug 2012, 13:40, 8 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

i'm in an uproariously good mood
i am leaving this job in 5 hours and will be going to festival tomorrow, and the weather looks GREAT.
reckon you can sink my fragile hopes of joy with your withering invective?

alt q: what Food do you take to festivals? i tend to favour stuff you can kneel on while rummaging frantically for something in your tent, and can stay out in the warm for a while without becoming inedible- ie granola traybakes, oranges, jerky,flapjack, and meal-in-a-tin shakes.

alt alt: best uk festival you've been to and why?
(UppityDamnPrimate LET'S OPEN THIS F*CKING PIT UP, Wed 8 Aug 2012, 11:56, 202 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

NO SELL OUT
If your teenage self met the ‘you’ of today, would they recognise themselves, or would they think you were a sell-out wanker? I’ve never been a political type and was hugely relieved aged about 15 to realise that I could be a massive caner without having to pretend to be a mung-bean munching lesbian rights protester type. Reading about the 70s, it’s hilarious - so many times people say they had to pretend to subscribe to ‘right on’ ideals in a desperate attempt to get sex. My brother and I were deadly serious about our lifestyle choices and our later lives have suffered to an extent – we are still flying the flag when so many of our compadres are in denial about their young ways.

Perhaps you are *still* a delusional idealist, like my otherwise splendid campaign manager Al? It seems to me that a couple of decades of real life outside the student bar does for most people’s hippyish tendencies.

Whaddyareckon?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 8 Aug 2012, 10:31, 144 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Declarations of love
Someone sent me a gaz at 2am this morning telling me they love me. Ahhh.

When did someone surprise you by telling you they loved you?

Alt: can you remember the first someone (other than family) told you they loved you? Did you reciprocate or tell them to fuck off?

Altalt: ever been in a situation of unrequited love?

Altaltalt: cunt off you fucking spastic window licking pissface.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 8 Aug 2012, 7:48, 217 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Hercules seems to be responding to the antibiotics.
More news as it happens.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 8 Aug 2012, 7:06, 7 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Chris Hoy is the same age as me
he has 6 gold olympic medals, i have bacon and spinach pasta.

evening shift, assemble!
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 7 Aug 2012, 18:11, 73 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Breaking news:
you are gay. Shocking eh?

I think I'm going to do your mum up the arse tonight.

I bet you'd love it if I did.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 7 Aug 2012, 16:02, 80 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Breaking news:
Mika, is gay. Shocking eh???

I think I'm going to get a dominoes 2 for tuesday tonight, what's the best dominoes pizza?

I bet you all love dominoes.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 7 Aug 2012, 14:43, 207 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Help me out /OT,
I'm sorting out the pub quiz for tonight, and i need 5 film quotes, from 5 different films that all have the same actor in. The quotes don't neccesarily have to be from the actor, he/she just as to appear in all 5.
This is for a pub quiz mind, so none of your obscure vampire fat porn stuff.

Alt: If you don't want to help, why not?
Altalt: When was the last time you were genuinely terrified? I had a really narrow escape in my car the other day, almost got taken out by a lorry that was being driven like a prick, had to stop and have a little wait before i got the confidence to drive on.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 7 Aug 2012, 13:06, 183 replies, latest was 12 years ago)