Rihanna is stupid

(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 16:05, 4 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Meeejia Thread
How's your media concumption? seen/read/heard/whatever any good books/film/telly/music that you would like to share with the rest of the class?

I fancy a mojito soooo bad right now.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 14:23, 58 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

I watched Dr Who the other day.
It was great, they said the name of the show in the show, that's great I love it when TV does that.

The new girl is attractive but annoying, who else is attractive but annoying?
(PsychoChomp, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 13:14, 78 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

i peaked too early, i should have saved my calendar phrase for a new thread
alt tracey's bum has shrunk, her play went well

altalt i'm going out for lunch soon
(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 12:06, 57 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Hospital radio is redundant?
www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-19270013
Thoughts? What do you think is redundant in our modern age? Vinyl records? Phones with cables?
Alt, I'm starting college next week, any advice for mature students? Other than the obvious "fuck off"?
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Mon 3 Sep 2012, 9:47, 141 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Alright you bunch of toilet brush-licking fetid self abusing shitcunts?
I have had to write an advert to get rid of a cat. What's the last thing you had to get rid of that you didn't really want to?

Alt: write an advert that puts a B3tan up for sale.

BTW - I couldn't give a flying turd what you got up to at the weekend, however I am sure some of you will want to bore others with details of your activities.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 3 Sep 2012, 8:07, 107 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

September Bash!
Hotels and trains all booked, just waiting on Monty to confirm the pre-bash food venue.

Evening, I'm waiting for a roast dinner to finish cooking whilst watching the remake of 'We Are The Champions - Special' on Channel 4. I'm a bit annoyed that the people in the pool haven't waiting for Ron Pickering to say 'away you go!' before they started.

Good weekend?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 2 Sep 2012, 18:19, 48 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Advert: Got to look for a new home for one of our cats.
As the baby has got older the cat has become more and more stressed, so it really isn't fair to keep the cat.

Please let me know if you know of anyone who may be interested in giving the cat a home. She's 10, long haired black female. Neutered and microchipped and has all her vaccinations.

Best suited to a house without young children, that has a garden as she spends sometime outside each day.

I will pay any vet bills for the first twelve months.

Please get in touch if you are interested or know someone who may be.

Tl;dr: pet available for experimentation and or vivisection.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Sun 2 Sep 2012, 10:32, 29 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Alright Not /talk. How are you this morning?
I've got a cold, but I got three numbers on the lottery last night, so it sort of balances.
What sort of toaster do you lot have?
What number have you got it set to?
How brown does that make the toast?
How do you make toast if you don't have a toaster?
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Sun 2 Sep 2012, 8:01, 3 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

So who's going to admit to being in on Saturday night?
I went out and did not drink so now I am home and not passed out
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 1 Sep 2012, 23:34, 10 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Morning Thread
Alright?
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 1 Sep 2012, 12:39, 5 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

EVENING THREAD
I'm having one of those weird moments where I've taken my tablets and its reacted exactly right so everything is soft and warm and like being hugged by a childhood dream and I can hear insects like you hear a field buzzing in hot countries and I got some thai food coming soon which I'm really really looking foward too and I've just seen this www.buzzfeed.com/expresident/the-cutest-things-that-ever-happened?sub=1675184_440483 and I have no socks without holes in.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 31 Aug 2012, 18:46, 26 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

2 hours and 15 mins til hometime
if you could be doing anything right now (except for anyone's mum), what would it be?

alt: this is my 3rd day with no diet coke. it's going better than i thought, in that i haven't killed anyone yet. what should you really give up?

altalt: what was the last word you said aloud? why?

altaltalt: so from tomorrow it will be a criminal offence to squat in a resi property. punishable by up to a year in prison and £5,000. thoughts?

i predict monty's: a year with a free roof over their heads and none of them will have £5 never mind £5,000, so why bother...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 31 Aug 2012, 15:16, 63 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Personal new thread for monty
I'm off to the shops to buy Rizzlas, do you want anything?

ha ha ha, it's like i'm really there with you people not on the internet in a different place. Haa, it's fun to confuse situations like that.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 31 Aug 2012, 13:50, 107 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

The Blues Song Thread
WEEEEELL I woke up this morning,
Some time around half past three
Yeeeeaaaaahhh I woke up this morning
Went straight to the lavatory
Through up half my guts,
Didn't leave the room till 4 20.

Of my bed I didn't think much,
So I typed in bee three tee.
Aaaaaa... nobody was around,
"Operating system can't be found"

Soo I went off to curries,
Couldn't decide what kind of HD
Yeeaaah went against an SSD
So got 1 terrorbity.
Realised I've lost my home directory.

I was supposed to hook up with a mate,
Was gonna go to see a film, not too late.
Buuuuut I decided Oh Woe Is Me....
And this is my sad sad story,
It started at half past three.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 31 Aug 2012, 12:51, 26 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

It's Fucking Friday!
Over the last 10 years, the world has evolved with fancy mobiles and computers, but culturally we have gone backwards... its mostly frowned on to go for a pint at lunchtime. Do you still uphold the traditional British rules of a Friday lunchtime pint then spending the afternoon opening and closing documents on your computer to appear busy cos you had 5 pints and you are too monged now to work?

Alt: Its sunny, I have golf with a mate who has flown in for the weekend, much beer, wearing sunglasses and a BBQ on Sunday with a hot tub lined up. What have you got lined up?

Alt Alt: have you got your lucky boxers/gstring on for your Friday night out?
( b3tz, Fri 31 Aug 2012, 11:36, 52 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Breaking the law, breaking the law.
Ever been taken to court? Ever taken anyone to court?

Ever represented yourself? I shall be doing this fairly soon and am already pooing my pantaloons at the mere thought of it.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 31 Aug 2012, 9:51, 120 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

I am fed up to the back teeth of these repulsive cybernetic sport-flids already.
They way they parade those hideous flipper-feet things around is revolting. Why don't they have the common decency to at least try to hide their missing limbs/spazzy faces etc? In the good old days disableds were hidden away in shame like that boy in the Secret Garden. If I looked like some freakish kangaroo-man I'd stay at home so I didn't scare children and turn the stomachs of normals.

The Jamaicans have it right. Disabled reggae band Israel Vibration (they were quite good actually) used to struggle to get live bookings because their fellow Rasta bredrins believed them to be unlucky as they were cursed by God. Lol.

What're you up to this weekend?

Alt: Did you catch Tom Holland's superb documentary on Islam the other day (Channel 4)? It was absolutely fascinating, I thought. You should try to catch it if you have the chance.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 31 Aug 2012, 8:21, 121 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

why are old people so....ugh
They argue about everything because they think they're right, JUST BECAUSE YOU'RE OLD DOESN'T MEAN YOU KNOW EVERYTHING, BITCH.
Tell us of your old people.

Alt: supernatural things, believe in ghosts?

Altalt: songs that make you instantly happy
( Lisette von Falcon, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 20:07, 33 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

alright

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 18:53, 11 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Is there a store bought 'triple sandwich' that doesn't have a foul weak link?
The chicken triple I just got from Asda has a chicken and stuffing one that is utter shitballs.

Alt: You're the happiest type of hap-hap-happy buddy you've ever been....what is the song that'll turn that mood around and slap its cock around your face?

Altalt: What's the worst thing you've put in yourself?
( Reginald Donkeyfuck, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 16:07, 71 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

What can you hear right now?
I can hear a lot of eighties music that I'm listening to on purpose.

Alt: How many people have you spotted today that you'd like teh sexy tiems with?

Altalt: Do you prefer Opal Fruits, Chewits or Fruitellas? I like Strawberry Fruitellas myself.
(Captain Give-A-Fuck #internetpals4eva, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 14:40, 126 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Lunch?
Alt: go fuck yourself.
(MAX Degrees Bring your Own Balaclava, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 13:11, 77 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Just read this on the BBC
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-19396204

Tell us your tales of procrastination.
We still have xmas lights on our garage from four xmases ago. They won't work any more, since we cut the cable because it was getting in our way.

Alt: Whatever.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 30 Aug 2012, 11:21, 53 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

That thread is crap.
Alright you bunch of bastards?

What's the best newspaper? What magazines do you read?

Alt: best roast meat? What do you accompany it with? I am looking forward to lots of delicious autumn food, particularly game.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 10:08, 117 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

gid moaning
This week has seen me introduce a mate to the joys of the first Handsome Boy Modeling School album. It was a fixture of my stoner peak and still stands up well today.

My mate is Monty's age and is as curmudgeonly and protective of Detroit techno and 303 acid as Boyce is about garage punk and old skool hip hop.

When did you last introduce a curmudgeon to something simultaneously old and new?

ps he also quite liked Godspeed You Black Emperor!
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 8:47, 105 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Morning, my nig-nogs.
How's it going today? At least it's Thursday already. Payday for me tomorrow. Good news as I've lived on less than a quid (and the charity of others) for three days.

Are you good with money? Do you have 'savings'? Or are you (like all the best people) a profligate imbecile, like the dissolute son of a C18th nobleman gambling away the family estate in the clubs of Mayfair?

You can't take it with you, I always say. You can't take it with you and you can't give it to your own family because NICK CLEGG AND HIS CRONIES steal half of it and spend it on disabled ramps for blacks in Burnley or some shit. Yes, I am still going on about that.

EDIT: Channel 5, 8pm tonight: thank me tomorrow
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 30 Aug 2012, 8:45, 20 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

evening, evening crew
the most interesting thing about my day today was that the wire has been poking up from my bra, possibly for quite a lot of the day without me noticing :(

what the hell is wrong with you?
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 29 Aug 2012, 17:55, 80 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Olympics, Paralympics and...
We are only addressing a minority with these games targeting two sections of society, we need to be more inclusive and to this end I propose we have the Chavlympics.

This would address the needs of the underachieving class of scratters who populate a fair percentage of most countries (at least in the first world).

What events would they have for the Chavlympics? E.g. 100Meh you have to be carrying a small child, a large open can of cider, be smoking a joint and be showing 4 inches of underwear in your daft jeans. You can't drop anything on the way or you lose your benefits for 6 months.

Alt: What would you win a gold medal for (apart from trolling)?

Alt Alt: with all the life size laminated cutouts of athletes in the supporting stores, which OTer would you like a laminated life size cut out of and why?
( b3tz, Wed 29 Aug 2012, 15:28, 95 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Something less serious
Who would win in a fight - Solomon Grundy or Michael Finnegan? Explain your answer. Use diagrams where necessary.

Alt: Suggest your own gladiatorial match-up.

Altalt: I'm hungry. I get the feeling this should prompt a question but I can't quite put my finger on it.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 29 Aug 2012, 11:50, 130 replies, latest was 12 years ago)